Over the weekend, while I was spending time in my hammock and the Evil Twin pushed Sissy in her swing, I heard an unusual scritching sound.
I turned in the direction of the noise, and saw two squirrels - one chasing the other around a tree trunk.
I looked over at the Evil Twin and said, "I think those two squirrels are getting ready to be involved in some afternoon delight."
Then, I started thinking (bad!).
If a female squirrel is just hanging around, minding her own business and a male squirrel happens along, he can just have his filthy way with her.
The indignity of the animal world! Squirrel rape!
Man, that sucks. And, to think, no celebrity backs the cause of trying to prevent this from happening!
What a bunch of savages (and I mean the animals and the celebrities).
But, ya know? I have never seen squirrels involved in any hanky panky.
You'd think, after all this time on the planet, I would have witnessed that. No. I think the only thing I've actually seen is dogs doing their thang. Dogs are apparently very horny critters.
And that's why Ice Cube once said, "Men are like dogs. They just want to smell it and knock it." (I spoke to the Evil Twin and he said it was Ice T who made that statement - like I said, I get my Ice's mixed up sometimes... but whoever said it knew what they were talking about).
He's smarter than he looks.
This update was brought to you courtesy of horny squirrels. Have a nice day!