Tuesday, January 31, 2012

The Piss Poor Tooth Fairy

Right before her bedtime last night, Sissy agreed to let me numb her gums and let Daddy try to pull this raggedy old tooth that had been hanging by a thread for several weeks now.

This is the first tooth she has lost and she was very excited about a visit from the Tooth Fairy.

I wrapped it up in tissue paper, then put it in a little baggie so it wouldn't get lost under her pillow.

The Evil Twin has been working from home in the evenings lately and stays up pretty late. I left him in charge of the Tooth Fairying and went on to bed.

When I woke up this morning, I wondered if he had completed his mission. He FORGOT! Oh, it's only her first lost tooth and all...

She was still in bed, so he went in and of course she woke up as he was rifling around under her pillow. He said, "I just came in to check if the Tooth Fairy came to get your tooth." While he was saying that, he slipped the tooth into his robe pocket with one hand and slid the dollar under with the other hand.

She said, "There's money under here!" A whole dollar - let me tell you something - getting visits from the Tooth Fairy is not a "get rich quick" scheme around here.

She had to come and show me immediately. She was beaming.

So, even though the Evil Twin completely botched his job, he had a Hail Mary save with a little "slight of hand".

All's well that ends well, I suppose!

Her other tooth beside the first lost one is also getting pretty wiggly, so maybe the Evil Twin will remember that buck from now on! :-)


Friday, January 27, 2012

Some Days Are Tough...

But, I enjoy being a mom. When Buddy and Sissy are in school, it's both relaxing and challenging.

This is Buddy's last year of Middle School. He'll be moving on to the High School next Fall. Sissy will still be at the grade school, but in first grade. Kindergarten is typically not that demanding, but she still has homework.

I think next year will be a lot more demanding for both of them. I'm g. Ilad to say that neither of them are slackers and I had their IQs tested recently. Let's just say that I will NOT take the test myself because I'm sure my score would be much lower than either of theirs.

Anyhoot, when they're in school, I'm free to flit about the house - laundry, dishes, whatever I slacked on over the weekend AND I can shamelessly make up lyrics to existing songs to entertain both myself and the cat. I'm sure I enjoy it more than Bella, but it makes my day more interesting.

If it's just me here, the TV is never on. The only sounds I hear are the fridge making ice and Apple and Lovey (the parakeets) singing or arguing with each other. It's a very Zen existence.

Don't get me wrong - there is always something to do around here. But, it makes my heart all happy knowing that I can get around to it "eventually."

Speaking of "doing", I have several things to do before I pick Sissy up from school. I hope my hooligans have a great day and an even better weekend!


Thursday, January 26, 2012

Long Week

Well, the Evil Twin is back at work today. He took his pain meds with him in case he has another "episode". He will see our primary care physician next week to get an ultrasound of the kidney in question.

Lucky me, I get to see our primary care physician today for a follow up appointment.

I thought things were bad when Buddy was just a wee baby. He came home from the NICU weighing 3lbs, 12oz. He was almost 7 weeks old at that time. He had at least 2, if not 3, doctor/therapy appointments a week.

It was at this time I started with my anxiety issues. We lived in a different county - a little farther out than this county and all the appointments were in THIS county, so I'd have to get on the interstate and drive a while. (I-64 is also known as "If you make it to your destination alive, you're a lucky SOB".)

I would get so worked up about having my tiny baby in the car on the interstate I consider a death trap, I just lost it one day. Anti-anxiety meds to the rescue - and to this very day - almost 14 years later.

So, today, I get to see the doc, find out how high my blood pressure is (from driving on wet roads) and lord knows what else. I'm so tired, I think I could sleep for a day or two.

If I'm getting a shower today before my appointment, I have to sign off here. I hope all my hooligans have a good Thursday (It's not FRIDAY, yet???).


Tuesday, January 24, 2012

A Weekend Wild Ride

Buddy's birthday was Saturday. He had chosen Quaker Steak n Lube as his birthday meal destination.

He decided on the Steak and loaded fries, as opposed to the 6lb. Burger challenge. My rail thin child cleaned his plate (as usual).

As soon as we walked in, I let everyone know it was his birthday. The Evil Twin questioned my sanity...I even showed my newest tattoo (with the kids' birthdays and initials - I mean, who would fake a permanent mark like that?) I told the Evil Twin, "If it's your birthday, at many restaurants, you get something special FOR FREE." It was worth the effort for me.

Buddy was presented with a warm hot fudge covered brownie with ice cream at the end of the meal. He said it was amazing, but couldn't finish it (??? WTF That kid has a hollow leg), so he shared it with Sissy.

Everyone enjoyed the food. ETW even had a ginormous and tasty margarita! Yum!

On Sunday, we woke up and the Evil Twin was in a foul mood (not surprising, that's his normal MO for any day). He decided around noonish it was shower time. I heard the water come on, then I heard the water go off and also heard an anguished scream from the bathroom.

I thought maybe he slipped, so I went back to check on him and saw him limping across the hall to our bedroom. He was holding his back on the right side and could not stand upright. I was able to coerce him to flop up onto the bed where I could dress him and then called 911.

They took him to the ER where the docs suspected a kidney stone, but couldn't find anything other than a mass on the right kidney. They weren't sure if it was solid or fluid filled, but did say it wasn't "suspicious" looking.

I spent hours on the phone with the ER, and his family. I know that most hospitals don't allow anyone under 14 further than the lobby, so I just waited to hear from him.

They had given him some pain relief med in his IV and sent him out the door several hours later with 4 prescriptions. He feels somewhat better - still a bit sore, but the ER doctor told him to stay home for at least 3 days. He'll need to see our regular doc for an ultrasound of the kidney and then it will be determined if it needs to be drained, biopsied or surgically removed.

I already have plans for every day this week, so it should be interesting, to say the least.

I have a metric boatload of work for just today, so I'm going to blow this popsicle stand.

Hope all my hooligans have a great Tuesday!


Saturday, January 21, 2012

I Kinda Knew

14 years ago, I woke up this morning - at 28 weeks pregnant - and felt that something just wasn't quite right. I tried to shrug it off.

The Evil Twin and I got ready for work and stopped by my parents' house for breakfast. My mom noticed I was unusually reserved. I'm shy by nature, but if I've known you long enough and feel comfortable, I can be quite genial.

There are other times I am quiet because that's my mood. And, there are times I am quiet because I am preoccupied by something weighing on my mind.

January 21, 1998 I was quiet because I felt "off."

We had so many problems getting pregnant, losing several along the way and then once we knew we had a keeper, I had too much amniotic fluid. I was monitored closely.

At 18 weeks, the results from my AFP (alpha fetal protein) test came back high for neural tube defects (spina bifida, anencephaly, etc.) Some of these birth defects are not compatible with life, so we were terrified. How could I get to 18 weeks - clearly showing a massive baby bump - and the baby might not live after delivery? Why was this happening?

The next morning, we went to a Level 2 ultrasound. The baby had all necessary parts and nothing was amiss. We also found out we'd be having a boy!

We had no clue he'd be born 10 weeks later, at only 28 weeks. He was 2lbs, 5oz. He was not delivered (by emergency c-section) with a cry or even a good color. He received an APGAR score of ONE. A zero is for the stillborn babies.

The Evil Twin witnessed the whole ordeal, since it was such an emergency, there was no time to place a drape in front of me.

I can't even remember how many people were in the room, but he was pulled out - someone shouted "It's a boy!" I said weakly, "I know."

I didn't see him or anything for hours after that. (We couldn't hold him for nine long days while he was on the vent). He was rushed to NICU, put on a ventilator and attached to more tubes and wires I've ever seen on a person that size. Heck, I had never even seen a person that size.

Ironically, he was born on the anniversary of Roe v. Wade. Many states allow abortions even at 28 weeks (or later). And, there my son was, fighting for life. So very much wanted.

He was about 4 days old in this picture and that is me, changing his itty bitty diaper.

For being born so early and so sick, the only trauma he really experienced from his early arrival was developing ROP (retinopathy of prematurity), which is a very common eye condition with the preemies. He has worn glasses since he was 18 mos. old. He had laser eye surgery in early April - before his due date, even - at 4lbs, 4oz.

It was a tough year for all of us, but I thank God every day he is healthy, has a great sense of humor and really makes my life interesting!

Have a great Saturday, hooligans!


PS. I keep this poem close to me at all times. I post it every year, so I figure it's a tradition at this point:

Jefferey's Poem
By Garrison Keillor

When I first saw you, kid, you were tiny and thin,
And slimy and red and your head was mushed in,
I says to your mother, "He looks kind of sloppy,
And two pounds four ounces ain't big for a crappie."

But something about you, the look in your eyes,
Said you fully intended to grow to full size,
They slapped your backside and you let out a cry,
And I said, "We will keep him, at least we shall try."

Some babies are born in nine months, by the clock,
Some babies are born, and they sit up and talk,
Some babies are born, and no doctor is there.
Some babies are born, on a wing and a prayer.

Poor little fetus, as big as your hand,
Poor little fish thrown up on dry land,
Who came in April, though he had till July,
Too small to live and too precious to die.

They shipped you downstairs to the big Neonatal
Intensive Care Unit's computerized cradle
And attached you to wires and stuck you with tubes
Monitored closely by digital cubes.

And thanks to the latest neonatal therapeusis
And regular basting with greases from gooses
And hot chicken soup intravenously fed
You did not fade away, you grew up instead.

We'll always remember those months that you spent
With tubes in your head in the oxygen tent
And the mask on your face with the wires attached,
Sweet little boy who was only half-hatched.

I'm sure you'll grow up to mature and extend,
To six feet six inches and become a tight end,
But I'll always remember each doctor and nurse in
The NICU who helped make you a person,
The kid who crash landed, who was carried away,
Who survived it, this bundle we bring home today.

Friday, January 20, 2012

A Weird Winter

Typically, I get sick once or twice a year. Sinus/respiratory type thing. After suffering for a week or so, I end up at my doctor's office and walking out with a script for a Z-pack.

But, this winter has been different. Either there is something really wrong with me or I keep getting the same/similar cootie bugs. Today, my stomach has been all hinky and I got next to no sleep last night. I was so tired this morning, I was actually afraid to drive Sissy to school, thinking I may start sawing logs at the wheel, so I convinced her that her cough sounded bad and we should both have a day of rest.

Plus, Whooping Cough is going around here...she has had her immunizations, but no need taking chances, huh?

I'm thinking it might be that I have one in Kindergarten this year. We all know how those small fry are just little germ wagons.

Neither of mine ever had an ear infection until they were 4 and in preschool. They have had one each. (knock on wood I'm not jinxing myself here).

Granted, they didn't go to daycare, but I didn't keep them home constantly either. They both had their fair share of dirty toys in their filthy mitts and if I didn't watch close enough, said filthy toy would go straight into their mouth.

Buddy even tried to eat a ladybug once. And, he ate a kibble of cat food, too.

Around here, the old saying is, "You're not a well rounded child until you've eaten a peck of dirt."

Even Sissy is familiar with the "5-second rule", but ONLY AT HOME. If a grape falls off the lunch tray at school....Oh well, that grape is destined for the trash can or perhaps squashed under someone's shoe. Go ask for an extra grape if you're that hungry!

On top of feeling like crud off and on for the last month or so, my lips are so chapped they feel like onion paper and I think I'm getting a bladder infection (I'm a professional when it comes to the UTI, so I know it from a mile away).

Tomorrow is Buddy's birthday - and as usual, I will haul out my yearly story of his early arrival. He will be 14...I'm not old enough to be his mom, in my opinion. He wants to go to Quaker Steak & Lube and is considering trying the 6lb burger challenge. That thing is more than 3.5 times his own birth weight, but my son can put the food away these days.

We like to tease him about it being our own personal episodes of "Buddy Vs. Food". If Adam Richman ever needs a partner in crime, I've got one for him.

Happy Friday, hooligans! I'll see y'all in the morning! (or whenever the hell I feel like it...that's just how I roll.)


Thursday, January 19, 2012

I Need A Miracle

To get all the crap done around here that I would like to do. Perhaps I can catch up a bit this weekend.

It's looking like "Wordless Thursday" around these here parts.

Oh, I have some interesting chores and errands for later....those usually pan out to be awesome blog fodder. Because, really? Humanity? It's scary and full of the whole "What Not To Wear" vibe.

Thank goodness I travel with my whole video team (ME).

Some things are not worth my time, but if I had seen this, you KNOW I would have to document it.

Hope you hooligans have a great Thursday!

Love ya,

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Have You Seen My Energy?

If so, I really need it back. I don't know if it's the gloomy weather or one (or more) of my meds messing with me, but I don't care for it. I gave up caffeine a long while back, so I know it's not that.

It's almost like I should be a bear and hibernate for a few months. Maybe I'm just getting old? Maybe I need more B12 in my diet? Ugh!

It feels like I'm at a stalemate with myself.

I think, perhaps, it's just January. Every January brings anxiety. But, once I get past Buddy's birthday and start working on the taxes, I usually perk right on up....I like new money in the bank (that the government stole from my hard working husband and has been earning interest on it all year.)

I HAVE been enjoying my Kindle Fire and have found sources for free or really cheap deals on downloads. Unfortunately, I'm so behind on other things, I haven't had a chance to read what I've downloaded.

Besides, Sissy likes to appropriate it for herself and play games, watch YouTube, or read the books I've downloaded for her. Then, she hands it back when the battery is on its' last leg and picks up her DS or DSi for more entertainment. Whatever happened to just being a couch tater? I AM getting old!

Have a great Wednesday, hooligans. I know it's supposed to be a "black out" day for blogs, and while I do care about censorship very much (more than the average person, really), I don't much care to follow the crowd. Plus, I haven't written anything for days (i.e. NO ENERGY).

Love ya,

Friday, January 13, 2012

The Round Up

The kids are off school today for some sort of teacher educational day. It's a good thing, too - we got a brief dusting of snow overnight, so the County would have cancelled school anyway.

Since I knew there was no school, Buddy had a friend stay overnight. It's almost 4 P and I've just now seen them emerge from his room to get snacks and drinks. Those two always stay up super late. No surprise, really. We are night owls, his mom is a night owl, my biological mom and sister are night owls...We come by it honestly.

It's freezing and I haven't even had a shower yet. I think I'll send Buddy downstairs to fetch the mail (he has to earn his keep somehow). I would send Sissy, but the way the Evil Twin mounted the box under the carport, even I - at nearly 5 foot 9 - have to stand on my toes to see what is in the box. (For more info, re-read the always entertaining My Bad Side)

It's supposed to snow a bit more over the weekend, so I guess we'll be house bound. The Evil Twin did not order firewood this year...I hope it's not too late, because the possibility of losing electricity is always on the horizon in weather like this. One might think the electric company would make allowances for snowfall under an inch and no ice, but, they don't.

Anyone interested in buying this house (5BR, 2.5 BA, 2700 sq ft.) so we can move South, feel free to email me. $250K and it's yours! :-)

Enjoy your weekend, hooligans.


Thursday, January 12, 2012

SO Tired

I don't know what my deal is lately. I go to bed at a reasonable hour (usually around 11 pm or even a little earlier) and I wake at 6:30A. On weekends, I might be able to snag an extra half hour or so - depending on when Sissy decides to wake up.

The thing is: I started taking my crazy pill (Zoloft) in the mornings, along with my baby aspirin and Ativan. I used to take it at night because that and the high blood pressure med made me sleepy. But...I generally forget to take either of them.

I suppose I just need to sit them on the coffee table where I can see them in the evenings.

If I don't sit things where I can see them, I usually forget to take care of "whatever". If it's written on my "to do" list, the chances of it happening are much greater.

It's hard to get motivated to do much if I'm yawning all day. And, trust me, it's not because I'm sitting around watching TV (I don't do daytime TV) or constantly on the computer (although I do check certain things a few times a day).

I don't drink coffee - at least not often, maybe once every 6 months or so - and it really doesn't do anything for me. I don't drink sodas, so my days are devoid of caffeine at all. I have a phobia about liquid calories....that's a whole 'nother story, though.

It may also be the dreary weather here in paradise (<- sarcasm). I suppose I should wrap this up and get some things accomplished. I hope all my hooligans are having a better day than me. :-) Love,

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Our "Favorite" Activity

As some know, I make a weekly trip to the Mart of Wal. I don't enjoy it, but .... one stop shopping and low prices lure me back time and time again.

Plus, we really do like the Great Value (the Mart's generic equivalent to foods and Equate is the generic equivalent to pharmacy/health/beauty items). The food is superior to the brand names and I like the Equate Dandruff Shampoo as well as Head n' Shoulders, and I save a few bucks along the way. (Yes, I have a dry scalp - I'm not perfect, ya know?)

Anypoodle, I keep a "master list" of items needed in a little notebook and add to it as necessary. Sometimes, the Evil Twin needs things for his home office or things like razor blades, etc. and so, he'll jot those down on a different sheet of paper.

I then add that list to the "master list" and we're good to go.

As I transferred his items to my main list, I really didn't pay much attention. There were only four things on his list and they were the last four things added.

When we got to the store, I propped my little notebook up so I can see it and make sure everything is in the cart. When I scanned through it towards the end, I noticed that "Calgon" was on there. Since it was in the same location on the list of the things the Evil Twin needed, I asked, "Why is Calgon on the list?" (I knew I didn't put it there.)

He said, "Because we're almost out."

Me: "Of Calgon?? Do you mean Cascade?"

Him: "Yes, the dishwasher detergent, not 'Calgon, take me away.'"

I know I've done ridiculous things as well. One time, I needed Lysol spray. I had written down "Lysenol". At least Calgon is a real product. LOL.

So, I got my overpriced Cascade - the Cascade Complete - with enzyme action. It really is the best on the market, and all was right at Casa Evil Twin.

Have a great Wednesday, my hooligans!


Monday, January 9, 2012

A Good Idea or Poor Judgment?

I may have mentioned this before - or maybe it was on Facebook - I'm old and get confused often, but anyhoot, about a week or so before Christmas the Evil Twin told me that he wanted to get me a Kindle, but he wanted me to choose the one I liked best.

So, I did some research (I LOVE research!)(no, I really honestly do.) and decided on the Kindle Fire.

I had to wait until Christmas morning to open it and amidst the chaos and holiday mayhem, I didn't really get a chance to play around or use it much.

However, since the kids have been back in school and the Evil Twin is back at work, I have been a downloadin' fool.

All the classic books, most of which I've read, are free. But, I downloaded a few of those I really loved anyway. It'll be nice to have them on hand.

It's been such a long time since I've had good opportunities to read a book uninterrupted, so this is just amazing for me. I can also watch movies, download music and I'm not sure what else. I'm wondering if it can clean my kitchen. :-)

Anypoodle, I love to read and having several books at my disposal at all times is wonderful.

At first, I was a little worried it wouldn't be the same as a REAL honest-to-goodness-turn-the-pages BOOK. But, it's actually quite enjoyable and the fact that it's portable makes it even more appealing.

In the past, if I knew I'd be waiting for something (a kid, a tire change, a doctor), I might have thrown a magazine in my purse...IF I even thought about it. Now, I just fling "The Bookie" in my bag and I'm good to go.

But, the Evil Twin may have had a lapse in judgment because I love searching around for new books or movies, and then enjoying them in my "not so free time". Ooops.

So, if you come to my house and you see a dust bunny or two, blame the Kindle. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!! :-)

Happy Monday, hooligans!


Thursday, January 5, 2012

The Yearly PSA from the ETW

I think I bitch about this situation at least once a year and it's time to do so again.

Cookies. Girl Scout Cookies. They go on sale at some point in January. Now, I realize those Samoas are probably cooked in Satan's own oven (they're really good).

But, at $3.50 a box (that's the last price I've heard) and there are about 15 cookies to a box, it seems a little steep. That's not the end of it. The sweet little scouts bust their fannies to sell these things for cheap prizes and the troop receives -- get this -- .40 cents per box sold.

Okay, so that means the council makes $3.10 off the backs of children trying to win cheap prizes.

If you only do me one solid for the 2012 year, and you see a table set up or have a girl scout come to your door, ask for her troop number. Then, write a check to the troop. Instead of .40 cents, the troop will get the whole $5, $10, whatever you can afford for their activities. You don't need those overpriced cookies and all those calories anyway, right?

If you really MUST have a box of thin mints or samoas, buy them from a girl who is not in a troop. Some areas don't have enough girls interested to form a troop, so they're on their own. Guess how much they get for a box of cookies? A big, fat goose egg. Or, go directly to the council and purchase a box there.

Buying a box from a troop just means you're giving to the corporate greed - an executive director needs a new car, taking clients out for lunch is expensive, "Hey, let's all get new computers!". The waste never ends.

Don't get me wrong. I think the scouting experience has much to offer to all children, but IF I let my children participate, they would not be doing the fundraisers. (I think the boy scouts sell popcorn ? - and I'm not sure about their money division or sales protocol, so I can't speak on that.)

Furthermore, I don't care if they freeze well, you still don't need those calories, my hooligans. Have a lovely Thursday!


Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Random Thoughts

I like to multi-task. When I'm drying my hair, I'm also doing my make up. Except this morning.

We had snow and icy roads today, so school was cancelled. That meant I didn't need to leave the house and decided to forgo the make up ritual.

Well, I can't just be drying my hair, so I looked around and saw a basket of socks that needed matched and folded. Matching was pretty easy. Folding pairs together required a little more manual dexterity, but at least my hair was dry and socks were folded.

The hardest part was putting the socks in the drawer as I was limited to the length of the dryer cord to move around.

That got me to thinking about the hair dryer my mom had when I was a little shitball. You'd probably have to be my age or older to remember these models.

This one is really similar to the one my mom had:

Not really the ideal device to multi-task. But, then I thought... Someone should invent just the cap deal that delivers hot air, so you're free to walk around and do other things. I figure when the hair is to the damp-dry stage, you could move on to the regular dryer and a brush for styling!

I should totally patent this!

I hope my hooligans are having a very happy New Year and an awesome Tuesday.