Monday, October 31, 2011

18 And Life To Go

I had to borrow a little song title from the band Skid Row. Now, the actual song and this post have almost nothing to do with each other, except the number 18.

Yesterday, October 30th, the Evil Twin and I reached our 18th year of marriage.

We didn't do anything spectacular. He went and grabbed some sandwiches and then we all laid around in food comas and watched some football. Not very exciting, but as I explained to the kids: October 30th, 1993 was the highlight year. It's just downhill from there. LOL.I keed, I keed.

We've had our share of good moments and bad, but I think that's typical.

I may not act like it all the time, but I'm glad we got married. Without him, we wouldn't have our two beautiful children and I wouldn't laugh nearly as often (he's a hoot).

He has clean nails and no body odor, and he's tidy around the house - i.e. he doesn't leave stuff laying around for me to pick up and deal with.

So, all in all, I think it's a good union.

Now, we made it to 18 years and just have life to go. :-)

Happy Monday, hooligans - and Happy Halloween!


Friday, October 28, 2011

I'm So Glad it's Friday!

This has been a long and busy week. It was "Spirit Week" at Buddy's school, which means each class gets points for sporting the attire of the day - like yesterday was Mis-Match day. The kids wear things that don't match and get a point.

At Sissy's school, they had a "field trip" earlier in the week. It was a Bus Safety lesson, even though not all the children take the bus. It was an opportunity for them all to get on the bus, tool around the block and learn some safety rules about riding the scary fun bus.

At the beginning of the year, she had asked me if the bus had seat belts or booster seats. I said, "No." and she said, "Then I don't want to ride it." Fine by me. Then, last week she states that she DOES want to ride the bus. It's an option. I'll think about it.

Then, today, Sissy's school has a Halloween party. I sent her costume (Spider Countess). And, it's also popcorn day, show n tell day and something else I've already forgotten.

A day or so ago, a few forms came home for both kids (not the same forms). I did Buddy's because they were due today - Thanks for the extra "heads up" kid! (he handed them to me last night).

I think the school people are trying to kill me (LOL). It's no wonder I have 4 notebooks and two calendars full of information. I'm lucky if I remember to look down and see if I have shoes on when I leave the house! ;-)

Well, I'm outta here for a fantastic afternoon of errands. I hope all my hooligans have a wonderful and relaxing weekend.


Thursday, October 27, 2011

Who Knew?

When I had lunch with my friend the other day, she mentioned that her sons - one is a grade behind Buddy and the other is already in High School - came home starving and said that the lunch offerings were a bit on the puny side.

Now, we all know that growing boys can eat and eat and eat. In fact, they all possess at least one hollow leg.

When Buddy got home that day, I asked him about the lunch servings and he said that not only were they light on the food, but often, the food was barely edible.

They do have a salad bar in addition to the hot lunch offering, which is nice. But, get this: The students are separated by gender for lunch and the girls get to go first (makes sense - Ladies First), but by the time the boys arrive for lunch, the salad bar is picked over and there isn't much left. Can they not restock the salad bar area when things are running low or is the economy worse than I know?

All I know is I pay a hefty lunch bill for both children at the end of the month. So, I asked Buddy, "Would you prefer if I prepare a cold lunch for you every day, so you have enough food?" and he said, "NO! There is only one dorky kid who brings a cold lunch every day and no one wants to be like that."

Apparently, it is "uncool" if you bring a lunch. However, things are A-OK if you get a hot lunch and even if it's really horrible, you gain "street cred" points. (even if you pick at the nasty lunch and basically almost starve to death during the day).

I took a lunch EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. of my school career until 10th grade and we could go off campus and buy other things. My poor mom said she got so sick and tired of smelling peanut butter, she never wanted it again. And that was it for me: peanut butter sandwich, no jelly. Items I agreed to add were either apple slices or Fritos. From 1st to 9th, that was MY daily meal. In fact, I don't recall ever having lunch at the school cafeteria - just the smell of the place made me queasy.

Thank goodness, Buddy is a kid who still enjoys having a decent breakfast. I know he's not going off to school completely without any nutrition. Unfortunately, I'm old school and give my kids things like Cocoa Puffs (actually, the generic equivalent). Whatever. I grew up on boxed cereal and/or grits and I turned out...

OK? I guess? I graduated from High School and College. My Dad paid for my education, but he didn't facilitate in any way the outcome of said education. In other words, I didn't get a "pass". I did all the school work myself. And, back then, I lived on potato chips and beer (I was a vegetarian).

But, it breaks my heart that my son has to have such pathetic portions and choices for lunch. That kid could eat a side of beef by himself. Let's face it: Any 13 year old who loves squid/calamari and will order it any time he has a chance is not really your average 13 year old. LOL.

Happy Thursday, hooligans! It's all yucky and grey and rainy here, so I'mma zone out for a few. See ya tomorrow!


Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Again? Really?

Yesterday I had lunch with a friend who I've known since Buddy was in preschool. Her boys went to the same school. Unfortunately, she is battling breast cancer and has already had a mastectomy and is on her 2nd round of chemo, but she is the most gracious, vibrant sick person I've ever known. If you want to shout out a prayer or good thought for AW, I think that would be awesome!

Anyway, after our terrific lunch, I had to head up to the Mart for some groceries and a prescription. So, I tool around to the pharmacy first thing (if I don't, I will forget and check out without it). So, we all know how this usually goes for me.

I'm standing at the sign that says I'm next. Patiently waiting for a clerk to come to the front and assist me. I'm next, right? Hohoho.

No. This woman walks up on my left(outside the queue area), and asks, "Are you waiting on your prescription?" I said, "Yes." and she proceeds to pull her cart right up to the counter IN FRONT OF ME. I'm thinking "Holy shit! I think the Universe wants to drive me mad."

Still, I stood quietly and let Granny Clueless get her angina medicine or whatever. Maybe she was in a real hurry for her asshole cream, because it was itching real bad. I don't know....

I must have a sign on my forehead that says, "Doormat".

So, if you need a prescription real quick, wait 'til I'm in line. It's your lucky day!


Friday, October 21, 2011

I Love A Bargain!

OK, so yesterday, I mentioned the LivingSocial deal I saw in my email for a super eye exam/glasses place (same place I got my lovely glasses, that I do love). They weren't cheap, but you get what you pay for in most cases.

The Evil Twin didn't need the deal, my next appointment is in February, but I can't even remember the last time Buddy had his eyes checked. Since he was born early, he did develop Retinopathy of Prematurity and had laser surgery on both eyes - he was home from the hospital, but still only weighed 4lbs, 4oz. The surgery went well.

At 18 months, we learned that he would need glasses. We've been dealing with his vision his whole life.

This deal was too good to pass up - $75 and the LivingSocial deal offered an extra $189 for the full package.

The lady who helped us find frames selected several. One frame, Buddy really liked and they were being discontinued. Regular price: over $300.00. Our price, even with the lenses: FREE. Of course, I added polybicarbonite lenses with the Transitions and Sharpview. That put us a little over our free limit, but then I remembered I had a $50 credit at that store for my glasses being not on time as promised.

I used that credit and the total balance, from $428.00 came to $88.00. (don't get all flustered at the original price - Buddy has a very unusual prescription and often the lenses are several times the price of the frames).

They even tightened up his current pair, so they wouldn't slide down his nose all the time! Now, that is service!

The new pair he chose are so light-weight, it's like picking up a feather. Plus, they are gorgeous and they really fit his face just perfect.

The sales girl tried to get him to try on a pair with thicker frames...LOL. He said, "I'm not even trying those on." We both laughed at the BC glasses (birth control glasses - so fugly, no one would want to date you).

We will definitely be back to Ramsey Eye Care and I think we'll have to get Daddy to switch too. They are just too wonderful!

Have a wonderful Friday, my sweet hooligans and enjoy your weekend!


Thursday, October 20, 2011

Who Told Winter It Was Welcome?

Yesterday, it rained like a monsoon and was also kinda chilly. Today, the temps have dropped into the mid/upper 40s and that makes ETW want to cry.

Here I am, this poor child from the deep South. (Okay, we weren't poor, but most Southerners kinda have the same mindset). I almost never wore shoes if I wasn't going anywhere or had school, etc.

I still rarely wear shoes, even outdoors. But, when the weather cools down enough, I reluctantly pull out socks and my "winter" pair of shoes. I only have one pair - Land's End Hand sewn mocs (which they don't make anymore)and I've had them for about 10 years? Maybe longer? I think tennis shoes are horrific and I'm not too keen on other cold weather shoes.

Yesterday, despite the monsoon, I wore my Mickey Mouse Croc-Flops (like flip flops, only with Mickey Mouse heads on the front - bought at Disney World). There was a load of standing water, so I could feel the water swishing under my feet. It made me laugh.

I think when the weather gets crappy and I can still have a smile on my face, it's all good. But, today, I had to wear my cold weather shoes. A Southern girl can't take it when the temperature is below 50. That's just not even right!

Unfortunately, I still have to make one more trip out and about this afternoon. The Evil Twin will be picking up Sissy from school, while I take Buddy to a much needed appointment at the eye doctor. I got this amazing deal from And, it's the same place I went to get my "I'm blind and can't read up close" glasses. They're awesome and the deal is even more awesome!

Y'all should check it out and see what great deals are available in your area. This is the first deal I've purchased, so I'll let you know how it goes!

Until then, sweet hooligans, enjoy your Thursday - even if it is rainy and cold and not suitable sandal wearing weather.


Wednesday, October 19, 2011

The Pharmacy

Need I say more? Why, yes. Yes, I do.

I had to stop by our friendly neighborhood Kroger to pick up two prescriptions I needed.

I stood at the sign indicating where patrons should wait until the party in front of you is finished with their transaction.

Finally, it was my turn.

As I approached the counter, so did a guy who might have died in 1974 and no one informed him yet. That, or he was due to be reincarnated as a parrot because that's how close he was to perching on my shoulder.

I kept giving the clerk the hairy eyeball and then moving my eyes to the right (where Mr. No Clue stood breathing down my neck).

She really wasn't getting the hint, so I raised my voice and said, "Boy, howdy! I'm glad my medicine came in. Now, maybe I won't have another occurrence of my herpes."

At that point, she seemed to "get it" and asked the dude to step back a bit.

The most absurd thing is that he only had a refill to drop off - which is a window around the corner from the pick up area.

There are TWO signs posted about patient privacy. One is about 4 feet from the counter. The other is directly ON the counter in front of the register.

Oh well, I got rid of my little shadow and all was right with the world. Until next time.....

Happy hump day, hooligans.


Monday, October 17, 2011

Casa Evil Twin

It was a pretty exciting weekend around here - by our standards, anyway.

On Friday evening, the Evil Twin's younger sister (by 2 yrs) turned 50 and her BFF for life threw a surprise birthday party for her at a local restaurant. It was loads of fun and we were able to catch up with so many people we don't see that often. Even the Evil Twin's younger brother (by 4 years), his wife and their daughters - our two very lovely nieces were there. They live a few states away, so it's always a pleasure to spend time with them.

Buddy is a year younger than the oldest niece and Sissy is a year younger than the younger niece. The kids had fun running around the restaurant together. This restaurant has an outside deck on the river, so I allowed some running around - normally, they sit in their seats for the entire meal. It was more of a beachy/party feel, so I wasn't too strict. :-)

On Saturday, the family came by our house and hung out for a few hours. That was nice.

Sunday, we decided a trip to the Target was in order. Buddy needed new tennis shoes (in a serious way) and Sissy needed a few new pairs of jeans that weren't high waters.

The previous week, when I picked up Sissy from school, her teacher told me that she had been called into a meeting with the 5th grade teachers. She was asked to read them a book (a cold read - not one she had seen before), and she only stumbled over one word. The next day, I asked her teacher what prompted this and she said, "Oh, we just wanted to show her off." LOL. That girl loves to read (she's 5). I think she's well on her way to being tested reading at the college level by 2nd grade, just like her Momma.

I'm not sorry I let her eat 2 Moon Pies for breakfast this morning. That chocolate coating probably has milk in it, right? :::shrugs::: The way I see it is: If they're eating - anything - it's better than nothing.

When I was a youngster, and a very picky eater, my pediatrician told my mom, "She will not starve to death. If her body craves it, then let her have it." He was a wise man. And, also from the deep South where we like to eat any number of odd things.

Well, hooligans, this is my motto for Monday:


Friday, October 14, 2011

A Gnauisance

Every year, around this time, we are plagued with gnats or fruit flies or something really bothersome. I guess with the cooler weather, they want to find a warmer place to try to get lodged in my eyeballs. Or up my nose. Or be consumed in a glass of wine when I'm not paying attention - hey, it's protein, right?

I cleverly set up my little "wine traps" when I see more than one in an area. Like me, they can't seem to pass up a little sip o' the hooch and then....BLAMMO. They're drowned. If ya gotta go, that's a pretty good way to check out.

After all, don't they only have a life cycle of just a few weeks anyway? Just long enough to get nasty with each other, then spawn other little gnats to make my life a living hell.

They seem to be particularly interested in me. Seriously, I feel like Pig Pen from the Peanuts comic/cartoon. And I shower daily your majesty (any guesses what movie that line comes from?).

I guess it could be worse. Yuckier critters than gnats. In our old house, every Fall brought the plague of lady bugs. Our sliding glass door looked like the fly room in Amityville Horror. I sucked up those stinky, rag tag intruders with my vacuum, then immediately threw the bag out.

It probably doesn't help our cause in that Buddy leaves a number of soda cans lining the dresser in his room. The trash can is RIGHT NEXT to the dresser, so we have not been able to determine where the disconnect is between placing the cans out in the open or placing the cans in the trash receptacle.

My kids are smart ones, but I wonder sometimes. Gnats and fruit flies love sticky, sweet syrupy type meals. It's safe to assume those flying little bastards will be willing to cut a bitch just to be the first to get inside those cans.

I'll keep setting out my little wine traps. Lord, I hate that I have to share my meager wine stash with bugs, but it has to be done. Maybe by November, we'll be a gnat free zone.

Have a happy Friday, hooligans! Enjoy your weekend. :-)


Thursday, October 13, 2011

Missing: My Motivation. Have You Seen It?

I don't know when I saw it last or even the location where it might have gone missing.

It seems like everything and nothing are going on at the same time. Know what I mean?

I just need to find my balance in life again. And, I'm working on it. I tend to be a bit on the borderline anemic. It's been that way as long as I can remember. With both pregnancies, I was told to take iron supplements. With Buddy, I bought the supplements and he was born the next day, so I didn't even get a chance to get started on that.

With Sissy, I took a prenatal vitamin, an iron supplement, folic acid supplement (I can't even remember how much, but it was several times the average need..."Advanced Maternal Age" and all that good stuff, ya know.), progesterone, 2 injections a day of a blood thinner and a baby aspirin.

While I do not enjoy being a walking pharmacy, I did whatever I could to get her to full term. [For those of you not aware, Buddy was born at 28 weeks - 2lbs, 5oz - due to a semi-rare blood clotting disorder that was not diagnosed until after his birth]. Besides being a snotty sullen teenager - normal - he did not suffer any long term ill effects of his early arrival.

Maybe I need to get back on those iron pills. Who knows? I have a doctor's appointment next week, so perhaps I will find out more. There will be blood work involved and a gallbladder and liver ultrasound. Good times. Good times.

I really don't care what they do or what I have to do. Getting a bit of energy back would be really nice! Dontcha think? I'm old enough to be a granny, but seriously! I shouldn't be acting like one! LOL.

Well, my house needs my sorry lackadaisical ass attention for some cleaning, so I will bid you happy Thursday, my hooligans - hope your day is more productive than mine! :-)


Wednesday, October 12, 2011

2 Day Vacation of Sorts

The kids were out of school for Columbus Day on Monday and then, they were also off Tuesday for.... I don't know. Teacher planning day? I'm really not sure. I just go with what the calendar says.

I'm a flaky mom, at best. I do try, but I'm so tired all the time. Often, things will get put on the bottom o' the list.

I have a love/hate relationship with school. I like it because I can get things accomplished during the day. I hate it because I have to get up early and get the small fry ready for school. Buddy does most of his own stuff, except I do get him cereal in the morning because it's faster if I do it. Sissy is much more labor intensive and mostly not very cooperative. That's when I start to lose my mind.

Luckily, I can get her ready in time and myself semi-ready in time to make it there before the tardy bell. (All my life, I have hated being late for hasn't changed since I've gotten older).

Speaking of being older, last night I was sitting in the lobby area waiting for Sissy to complete her dance class. I started to chat with the mom next to me and I asked what her daughter's name was. She told me and then followed up with, "It's from the XXXX song. My mom named her." I said, "Oh, yes, I am a child of the 70s. I love that song. I was born in 1968."

And then....she said it: "So was my mom!" Seriously?

Suddenly, I felt much older than my (very few) 43 years. PLUS, her daughter is a year older than mine. OUCH.

Despite the age difference, we had a lovely conversation and even exchanged numbers, with the hopes we could get the girls together for a playdate. Neither of us live in neighborhoods where small children are common, so it makes sense to set up a weekend day where they can play - either indoors or out.

It was nice having a few days "off" my regular routine, but I am exceedingly tired today. And, I'll be thrown off my schedule for a while. But, it's one day closer to the weekend. Yay!

I hope all you hooligans have a lovely Wednesday and I'll C U 2morrow! (hee hee).


Friday, October 7, 2011

Reading is FUNdamental

Both of our children have been read to since they were tiny babies. We practiced ABCs with them both early on as well.

I am not the best parent in the world. I plopped both of them in front of the TV when they were small. However, I DID try to find the most educational shows. If I couldn't find anything educational at the time, I didn't feel like Spongebob would send them to therapy later on. I'm not a censor and the way I see it is: It's okay to mix in some fun with some learning. It can't always be reading, math, science, etc. Children also need to sharpen their sense of humor.

That will get them a lot further in life on a social level than memorizing the entire string of Pi.

As a child, I was Contessa Nerdleroy, but I also had parents who let me stay up late on Saturdays and watch Saturday Night Live (in the early 70s, when it was actually good). And, my mom never went thru a grocery check out line without buying me the newest issue of MAD magazine. ("Only 50 cents!"). Heh.

It's really no surprise to us that both children have been accomplished readers early. But Sissy, she really blows us away.

Naturally, the second child gets the shaft when it comes to attention, so I've done the bare minimum to try to keep her at or above her age level in learning and developmental behaviors.

She is 5. She can read things that she has A) Never seen before. B) Never been read to her by an adult and C). Mastered words that she has never been coached on by us or her teachers.

I'm not trying to be braggy, but it does make my heart feel good when my kids do well with whatever happens to catch their interest. That's what it's all about: Do what you love and love what you do.

If you have an extra moment and are so inclined to check it out, our own Jeff Kay from the West Virginia Surf Report offered me an opportunity to guest post on his site this week (today, in fact), since he is on vacation. I was nervous as hell, but I managed to plop out something resembling a post (nothing WVSR worthy, but I tried).

I'm so glad it's Friday, hooligans. Aren't you? I hope y'all have a wonderful weekend and I'll see ya soon!


Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Life: She is Complicated, My Friend

Why is it that life can never be just "it is what it is" all the time. It seems like I have the most unpredictable things pop up. And, I love the predictable.

This year has been very difficult for me. I haven't had to shuttle a child to school in the morning for over 3 years. Now, I have to take Sissy in, because her school starts an hour later than Buddy's school. The Evil Twin drops him off and then continues to drive to his office.

So, I valiantly face and fight the morning cluster of the DOZ (the "drop off zone"). It's a madhouse.

Yesterday, we were all off for the "special election" for Governor, and then today, we're right back in the thick of things with the madhouse adventures.

I received a call from my sister-in-law this morning (she's married to the Evil Twin's younger brother) to let me know that our mother-in-law is in the hospital. My SIL didn't have many details, but I could narrow down the most likely hospitals to just 2. My second call (hospital #2) was the one.

The initial thought is that she has diverticulitis and may need colon surgery. Apparently, she has been there since Monday. Check it out: this is WEDNESDAY. The only reason my SIL and her husband found out was because my SIL had sent her an email and hadn't had a reply.

Do you think that MILs husband could have called any of us? I stay home, my SIL is at home and the Evil Twin's sister is also at home. There is no excuse for not trying to contact even one of the three siblings. Smooth move, Ex-Lax. We won't forget this.

I have to go and plan out the rest of my day. I hope all my hooligans have a happy Hump Day!


Monday, October 3, 2011

Weekends Go By Too Fast!

Luckily, we do have an odd "Special Election" day tomorrow, so all state employees are off and the kids are out of school (the polls are set up in the public schools).

Of course, the Evil Twin and I will be getting out to vote - as we always do. We also always see the same familiar faces helping out for our district, so that's kinda fun.

This past weekend, we had many errands to run. So, Saturday was the day of choice (out of necessity, not out of really wanting to go out.)

First, the children both had their hair cut. Buddy looked like a hot mess. His hair was all over the place and unmanageable. Then, we have Sissy. Her hair had gotten so long, it was a chore to wash it and dry it, plus it was always full of tangles. Getting ready for school - even with the detangle spray was a chore and full of "Owwws" and much whining.

Both of them had excellent cuts and I'm really happy about the results.

Then, we had to run to the Deep Homo (Home Depot) to purchase things needed around the house - it's always something.

Next up, the Mart. Not my usual mart. Noooo. The one I hate. And, it was the first of the month, which means "food stamp city".

Don't get me wrong, I don't judge anyone or any family who needs assistance, but it makes for a rather crowded day and the check out lines were just crazy. Really, I had not had a chance to get out earlier in the week and it came down to crunch time.

We finished up in a mere 3 and a half hours overall and I'll take that as a win!

How was your weekend? Did it fly by likes ours? I hope all of my hooligans have a happy Monday - I know that's asking a lot, but just try, OK?