Friday, February 26, 2010

Friday Secrets

Lots of secrets this week! And there is a special little treat at the end. But, read the secrets first. No cheating. :-)

1. I have watched some porno in my days.  And I have wanted to make home made movies with my wife.  Finally, I got a small video camera with a hard  drive and I asked if I could make a movie of her, to my surprise she said yes!  Now I can watch me and her doing things I use to see in the movies.  Its great!  She is wonderful and will do anything for the camera for me.  Plus, thanks to ETW, I also take pictures.  Mainly of her cleavage and boobs.  Home made porno and cleavage picture taking...what a great hobbies!

2. I think semen smells like mushrooms :-P

3. I would really like to have a sexual encounter with a hot stranger.  I'd like to just come across the kind of guy that you feel instant animal attraction to and for us to just do it, in a dressing room or somewhere like that. No talking about it, no introductions.  Just hot, raw sex.  And then goodbye. 

4. O the love of my life. Thank you for the great pictures for my birthday. You are the best and I can't wait until we are together and under one roof. I love you.

5. Mrs. D from 3 Men and a Lady makes me horny! I'm bad but I can't help it.

6. It's not that scandalous, but I hate tipping.  Call me cheap, but I wish things just cost what they cost.  I hate feeling sucked up to for a good tip.  I always feel like I didn't leave enough or I feel ripped off because I left too much. 

7. I work in a professional office.  When I am sure nobody can see, I will sometimes unzip my pants and expose myself.  It isn't my intent to flash people, but I enjoy knowing later when I walk into that office or meeting room with colleagues, that as we speak of professional things, my dick has been exposed there.

Pretty immature for a guy approaching 50; I know.


Happy Belated Birthday, Al!

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Confession Time

I cheated. On my Lenten sacrifice of giving up bread and all baked goods.

Buddy has a friend at school and their family just lives up the hill and a street over from us.

I got a phone call from his mom on Wednesday afternoon and she said she wouldn't be able to make it to pick up D and asked if I wouldn't mind. Of course, I didn't mind. She said I could take him to my house and she'd pick him up here (she didn't want to put me out), but I assured her that they're only a half mile from us and I didn't mind taking him to his house.

So, I took him to his house and his mom popped her head out the front door and said not to leave just yet. She came out of the house with a bag. A bag that contained TWO different types of bread, just fresh out of the oven. D and his family moved here from Turkey 10 years ago, and I don't know what these breads are called, but I felt it would be rude to not enjoy a gift.

One of the breads had spinach, onions, caraway seeds and a hint of curry. SO blasted good.

The other bread was round like a pizza and fluffy inside, with a nice chewy texture outside and also delicious.

I didn't go overboard. I had one piece of each and let the rest of the family go to town with them.

I talked to Buddy about it. He said, "You're kinda in a tough spot." I said, "Yes, but I'm not going to hurt anyone's feelings by turning down their generous gift."

I explained to him that people from different countries have different mores and cultural norms than we do. Something we think is completely innocuous could really offend someone who has lived in a different country since they were born.

Plus, that bread smelled great and I happen to love Middle Eastern cuisine. Not to mention that I tend to be borderline anemic, and spinach is a very iron rich food. (rationalizing, here, folks!). :-)

I do feel a tiny bit guilty - I made it thru Lent a few years ago with no slip ups when I gave up bread that year.

Also, I wanted to clear up things about the blog roll yesterday. If I "follow" your blog, it will pop up on my side bar when you update your blog. So, Slyde, you are totally on there.

And, as always, it's not too late for Friday Secrets. I have a few already. Plus there will be a special surprise with the secrets tomorrow. You'll just have to wait and see... Mwahahahaha!!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

My Lazy Is Getting Worse

Some of you may or may not have noticed that I changed my blog roll to the "real time" version that updates as people I follow post new entries.

I had to have a little (lot) of help from my friends - namely one super sweet 3 Men and A Lady! Seriously, check her out. She's sweet, funny, beautiful, the whole package.

Anypoodle, she helped me locate the correct way to do a "real time" blog roll. My old list contained many blogs that I no longer followed or who no longer had a blog at all.

I knew a regular clean up would be hours of my time. I need those hours to read all the blogs I love! I mean, come on, people! Just because I'm a stay at home mom doesn't mean I have endless "free time". In fact, I have less "free time" than most people.

So, I went to this format so that my faves would pop up as posted. I encourage you to check out anyone on my site. I'm all about quality, ya know? (Well, most of the time. Sometimes, I'm just about the juvenile humor of bodily functions, so read at your own risk! LOL). Let's face it, we can all use a laugh every now and again.

Perhaps someday, if I find the time, I will go back to the original format and actually update current blog faves, since some I like don't post very often, but I hate for them to be left out.

Come by often, check them all out! You won't be sorry! :-)

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Bizarro

In our old neighborhood, we would get a little local paper each week. I would always at least flip through it to see what was going on in the community.

Sometimes, I would find really unusual entries.

Such as this one:

 

You can click to make it bigger if you have trouble reading them. I can't remember if they were both in the same paper or on consecutive weeks. 

Now, I understand this family is hurting. They lost a loved one in a very violent manner, but does the public in general need to know the gritty details? 

Am I the only one who finds these "In memory" pieces to be odd? 

But, I do like the "greasy bellied" part. I think that's a nice touch. 

I'm outta here. I picked up my van yesterday afternoon and I think I'll actually get out of the house later on! 



Monday, February 22, 2010

Never a Dull Moment

It's always something around here! On Thursday, I got in my van to pick Buddy up from school. And the key wouldn't turn AT ALL. I tried everything I could think of to get the ignition to turn over and nothing worked. I called the Evil Twin to pick up Buddy and I called AAA to take a look at my van.

They ended up towing it (dragging it onto the lift, because I couldn't move it out of Park and the front tires wouldn't move).

I was hopeful that I would get it back on Friday. The ignition thingy needs to be replaced. I got a call late on Friday saying they had the part, but weren't able to get to it, so they'd call on Monday when it was ready. At least I'll get it back at some point today.

Buddy walked home on Friday after school. It's only .7 of a mile and many kids on our street walk home. I guess he'll be hoofing it today, unless I get my van back sooner.

It stinks not having a vehicle, but we had the Evil Twin's Buick. He calls it his PawPaw car. It's a 2003 with about 29K miles on it. We inherited it after my mom passed away. It's nice, fully loaded. My dad was an old dude who loved his Buicks.

The Evil Twin took me grocery shopping on Saturday, so we're good for the week. Although it does seem strange to not be gearing up for a grocery run on Monday.

And, in other news, we had Pepper Steak in the crock pot yesterday. I will leave you with the recipe and then I'll put it on my recipe blog later. (I think I'm about a week behind on updating that). I still feel under the weather, tired, blah. My right lung hurts like someone is jabbing me with an ice pick every time I inhale. I *always* end up with pleurisy when the congestion moves to my chest.

Pepper Steak
1 1/2 to 2 lbs. beef round steak
2 tbsp cooking oil
1/4 cup soy sauce
1 cup chopped onion
1 garlic clove, minced
1 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp pepper
1/4 tsp. ground ginger
1 can (16 oz) tomatoes with liquid, cut up
2 large green peppers, cut into strips
1/2 cold water
1 tbsp cornstarch.

Cut beef into 3 in. x 1 in. strips, brown in oil in skillet. Transfer to slow cooker. Combine the next 7 ingredients, pour over beef. Cover and cook on low for 5 to 6 hours or until meat is tender. Add tomatoes and green pepper - cook on low for 1 hour longer. Combine the cold water and cornstarch to make a paste, stir into slow cooker and cook on high until thickened. Serve over noodles or rice.

This one has a few more steps than usual, but it is NOT hard by any stretch. This is my  mom's recipe and I follow it to the letter and serve it with rice. As you can tell, it's been loved on a lot! I think I need to transfer it to a card. I remember writing this down while on the phone with mom, so it's messy, but I can read it.

I'm working on a way to do her Swiss Steak recipe in the crock pot. That's the Evil Twin's favorite. Buddy pronounced the pepper steak to be his all time favorite crock pot recipe yet! High praise coming from a 12 year old!

Friday, February 19, 2010

Friday Secrets

The ladies are stepping up to the plate this week. Every one I received is from a female (at least that's how I read it).

Without further ado, I bring your Friday Secrets:

1. When I was 18 I had a secret affair with a man in his 40s.  I started it.  He was successful and handsome and I was bored with boys my age.  We secretly carried this affair on for 9 months.  We saw each other nearly every day and no one ever found out except a couple of my close friends and one of his.  I loved that he was in awe of me and he loved feeling young and desirable again.  I also learned a lot, if you know what I mean.  Towards the end I began to get bored and broke it off without explanation.  His heart was broken a little.  We see each other in passing here and there and I pretend we don't know each other.  My husband would die if he knew.  I'm not sure he'd think the same of me ever again. 


2. For the first time in my married life, I am seriously considering cheating on my spouse with a friend.  I don't know if the opportunity will ever present itself, but if it does I won't say no.  I am so bored and feel so unloved that I don't think I will feel guilty about it at all. 

3. At my wedding, I had the biggest sense of dread in my chest.  Walking down the aisle, I felt like I was marching towards my death.  Although I knew we had to do it, I knew I was sealing my fate in that I would never truly be happy.  And so far, I have been correct.  Happiness in my relationship is always just out of my grasp. I think he feels the same.

4. I cheated on my husband when we were dating several times.  One of the times, I went home with this one guy who I'd always had a major attraction to. We had a fun night.  I gave him a killer bj and even swallowed and enjoyed it (not normally something I am into).   Guess who I don't swallow for?  My husband.  Ha ha.  And years later this guy is now his boss.  My husband has no idea it ever happened.  I smile when I think about it.

For the record, I didn't submit a secret, so none are mine. :-)

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Sucker!

Ok, I have a degree in Advertising and I don't get sucked in very often (unless it involves Wendy's! LOL)to commercials on TV. I don't watch much TV myself, but it's always on. Someone is always watching something on the BATV (big ass TV).

So it's there and of course, I can hear it.

Damn that perky Jamie Lee Curtis and her talk about bowel regularity!

I personally don't have any problems in that arena, but I've been brainwashed by the "Activia Challenge" commercials! Eff a duck chuck! And, I've been feeling a bit bloated lately, I'm not sure why. It's probably this weather - I'm feeling blah andd not moving around as much as I should.

I had been doing the Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred workout. Everything was going along swimmingly until I somehow jacked up both my ankles and my left knee, so I've been waiting for those to feel normal again before I start that back. My left ankle will never feel "normal" after I took a tumble down the stairs at our old house 8 years ago and sprained it severely. The doc in a box told me I would have been better off with a clean break and now I know why. It hurts almost all the time. Or feels stiff most of the time. Simply excellent!

I bought a four pack of the yogurts at the store and had my first one this morning. I bought the strawberry. It's quite tasty.

And, it's also good for my modified meal schedule for the next 40ish days. I gave up bread and all baked goods for Lent (doesn't include pasta, rice or corn tortillas), so I'm in need of items to eat that aren't bread or baked goods or pastries. I'm really not much of a breakfast person anyway, but the yogurt gives me an alternative for a snack or even lunch on Friday.

I'm Catholic and during Lent, Fridays are a day of fast and abstinence. That means, we're allowed 2 small meals during the day, no snacking and no meat. What this means for me personally is that I can't even have a grilled cheese sandwich or a veggie sub on Fridays.

I did this same thing a few years ago. I ate salads, mac n cheese, and attended the Fish Frys that the Knights of Columbus host at my parish church (that's dinner). I'll get shrimp, green beans, baked potato, skip the roll, cole slaw and I generally always bring my own bottle of water or get sweet tea there to wash it all down.

Last time I did this, Buddy was in preschool. I am 5 foot 9. My weight dwindled to 110 lbs. (I was 108 when I got married, so that number is not startling to me). But, it was to others, apparently. When Buddy's preschool teacher begged me to eat a sandwich about a week before Easter, I knew I looked emaciated, but I refused.

So, let's see how the "Activia Challenge" and lack of bread goes for me. :-) Currently, I weigh 128. We could have a lotto on what I'll weigh come Easter. Keep in mind I won't be giving up ALL carbs. Care to guess? Or tell me I'm nuts? Feel free!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Speechless Wednesday

I'm sorry I don't have much for you today.

I found out this morning that a friend from college passed away on Sunday. She was 41. She lived a couple doors down from my roommate and I when we lived in Twin Towers at Marshall University.

The three of us, sometimes with her roommate, too, would run around and get into trouble. She was so sweet. I hadn't heard from her since college, but she often popped into my mind.

I had asked another mutual friend about her a few years ago and knew that she was living about 2 hours away, but still in WV. She had a husband, son and daughter.

She was teeny-tiny petite, but had a laugh that was as big as all outdoors. And, she said the funniest things all the time.



Some of the best memories I have of college include her.

Her parents still live in the same town she grew up and that is where I live now. There will be a celebration of her life at our parish church this evening. But, her memorial service and burial will be in the area where she has been living for many years.

At this point, they think she may have had a heart attack, but she's in autopsy. It might have been an aneurysm. Who knows? But 41? Really? And this is a sweet little gal who was physically fit...I guess we never know when it'll be our time.

Even though I hadn't been in touch with her for years, she frequently popped into my head - remembering some crazy thing we had done together or just hanging out in the dorms.

I've been reeling since I heard the news. Sorry this entry isn't funny or interesting, but it's what's on my mind and probably what will be on my mind all day.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

My Talented Readers

I have some very creative and talented stalkers readers (or at least they have a basic understanding of photoshop - LOL). No, seriously. I was sent another remake of my hausfrau image.

Ready?


Don't I look nice in lingerie?

I must have on a strapless bra here otherwise the top of the nightie would be hovering somewhere around my waist line.

What can I say? Gravity sucks! Or not, if you think like the Evil Twin and love the heavy hangers. I'm so glad I could help him out with that particular prophetic fulfillment.

You know, that's when you wish or will something to happen for so long and it finally DOES happen? I think that's the case here. Well, either that or having two kids - pumping breast milk around the clock for the first one and actually nursing the second one (aka "The Boobie Bandit" - she'd latch on any time she caught sight of a nipple). And they kept getting bigger and heavier.

Anyway, this image was sent with a regular email, but I'll keep it to myself unless the creator wants to out him or herself. Additionally, if anyone else wants to try on their mad photoshop skillz - feel free, but definitely send me a copy! I'm such a shameless hussy, I will post it here - it'll be like being an exhibitionist without really being an exhibitionist. Right?

Today is ANOTHER snow day - no school. The Evil Twin did go in to work. He has been digging the snow blower he inherited from my Dad. It has certainly come in handy this winter. He can clear our driveway and throw salt in about 10 minutes.

I'm off to get my day underway, or at least as much as I can with both children at home today. :-)

Happy Mardi Gras! or Fat Tuesday, if you prefer.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Title

Bah! I couldn't come up with a title. We did not have crock pot Sunday because it was Valentine's Day. We thought we needed something more specialer for such a special day (even though we are as far from the romantic types you'll ever know). We went to a Mexican restaurant and then went by the Mart of Wal, because apparently, Sunday was the only day it hasn't snowed in a while.

In fact, I don't think it's ever going to stop snowing completely. The school kids had to go in today to make up for the snow days they've had. I'm glad I didn't make our vacation reservations until August because the kids may be making up days until then!

Lately, the snow showers have been just enough to be irritating and unpredictable. If I read the weather forecast, they always make it sound like it's going to be worse than it turns out, so I worry about getting out.

Like I said, irritating! Stuck inside all day with the cartoon channels on. If I hear the Kidz Bop commercial one more time, I may just snap.

It was a nice weekend though. I managed to get our taxes finished and filed (woohoo!), and I've been gathering the needed materials to enroll Sissy in preschool for the Fall of 2010. Once she is in school, the TV will never be on during the day and all the golden silence will be mine again!

All that golden silence in which I can enjoy scrubbing the house from top to bottom. Speaking of that, the Evil Twin is off today for Presidents' Day, so I'll actually be able to throw in a load of laundry without my little shadow trailing me constantly!

Friday, February 12, 2010

Friday Secrets

Here are the Friday Secrets for the week of February 12th:

1. I'm an opiate addict. No one knows this except for my dealers.

2. I leave work twice a day to smoke weed on the clock.

3. I've cheated on everyone I ever dated.

4 I hate children.

5 Once committed armed robbery and got away with it.

6. I told my girlfriend that my sister practiced fellatio on me when we were teenagers and now she is freaked out and won't talk to me. I was 15 and my sister was 17 when this occurred. I know people find this wrong, but I think I came out okay. I only wish my girlfriend would talk to me again.

I received a secret a while back where the sender wrote a PS. "Don't Judge". I'm here to say that I don't. I hope my readers don't either. If you have advice, feel free to share it.

I collect these secrets and post them, so perhaps if someone out there reading has the same secret, they'll know they aren't alone.

Happy Friday, kids! :-)

Thursday, February 11, 2010

A Request Fulfilled

Last Friday, I had a secret/confession asking:

3. I was looking at the cartoon header of your blog. I don't know if this is a confession or a request, but could the Evil Twin create a version where you are only wearing the apron and nothing else. Needless to say, the pencil, duster and spoon have to stay, and naturally, the apron could be a little lower cut.

Well, the Evil Twin didn't jump right on it and I didn't press him - he could totally pull it off, but I figured last weeks real picture kinda covered the bases.

The next day I received this email from a reader:



I couldn't help but laugh and be flattered all at the same time. Notice I'm holding a dildo and drinking Merlot this time around.

I found the condoms to be a bit superfluous because Casa Evil Twin has never, ever housed a condom. Ever. But, still a funny touch!

I have no idea who this "secret friend" is (which is how he/she signed off).

I think my favorite touch is the butterfly tattoo above my right breast. The only tats I sport are on my left thigh.

Now, exactly how much awesome is in this remake? TONS, that's how much.

I replied to the email to ask permission to post it here and since it was a fake email, the artist in question took a while to get back to me, but gave me their permission, so..... VOILA! I give you the Horny Hausfrau!

Don't forget about the Friday Secrets tomorrow. I have a handful or so already, but you still have time to submit something, if you'd like.

Also, thanks for all the thoughtful advice for XXXX yesterday. All the responses gave me some things to think about, too. (seeing different sides to the issue). So, Thanks!

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Advice Needed

I have some readers who never comment and just send email and a few who comment infrequently, but mostly email. That is fine with me. I like getting email (and comments - comment whore, remember??)

Anyhoodle, I received this email recently from one of my readers asking for advice. He said that I could share it with my response and perhaps get some different perspectives from my dear readers, too.

His letter:

Dear Evil Twins Wife (in the tune of Dear Abby),

There are two women in my life right now that I feel really strongly about and am fairly certain I am in love with. One is a co-worker. We have a kind of a "special" thing going. I stop by her office and we chat, we flirt, we share stories. She spills her heart out and I listen. We meet in the hall way and exchange cute smiles, a nod and a wink at times. She's single, sweet, and lovely.

The other woman I know via a mutual interest. We exchange emails. She recently had me over for dinner (with other friends), but she's shy and a strong personality. We have feelings, I can tell just by the way she looks at me, the fact that she emails me personal stuff where calls me a special friend. We have coffee from time to time. We sometimes spend hours emailing back and forth. She's single, sweet and lovely.

I am equally fascinated and intrigued with both women.

Now for the hairy part. I'm in a committed relationship and they both know it. But I love hanging out with my co-working buddy and my mutual interest buddy. These women energize me and get my juices running again. My heart skips a beat when I hear from them.

What is going on? Why do I have these feelings? What should I do?

Thanks,
XXXX in the Midwest

And my response:

Dear XXXX in the Midwest,

In my opinion, if you've been in a long term committed relationship for a while, everyone likes to feel attractive and wanted. And having that might be a harmless flirting relationship with a friend, co-worker, email buddy, etc. It's a real ego boost, plus when those "first love" feelings fade, some of us want to feel those "butterflies" again.

That being said, I think that if you want to STAY with your long term commitment, then be very careful of crossing the line with your two lovely friends. FRIENDS. Not booty calls or anything like that. Men and women can maintain a platonic relationship (IMO).
ETW

This is just from my point of view. The Evil Twin and I don't have any problems with harmless flirting. We know we're like barnacles to each other - neither of us is going any place. We're stuck on for life. After all, I don't think we'd ever find any one else who would put up with us! LOL.

So, anyone have other advice for my friend XXXX here? Am I way off base? Don't be shy! Leave it in the comments section.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

I Be Illin'!

I woke up yesterday morning and my throat was on FIRE! It hurt like a mofo and my sinuses were all backed up. I used some throat spray and took some medicine.

Then, I forced myself to get to the grocery. I'm glad I did because the snow dumped down on us in a sneaky fashion overnight. School is canceled, so Buddy is home. There is no way I would be getting out in this mess today.

The Evil Twin didn't have a choice. He is working on a very important project at work and it needs to be finalized today.

I woke up this morning still feeling craptastic, but at least my throat isn't trying to spontaneously combust. I took my temperature: 100.2, so not too bad. It's probably just the creeping crud and not the flu (thank goodness!).

I feel like this:



I will get out of my robe at some point today, but really, who knows? I'm not a morning person on my best of days. Plus, I woke up at 3 am - I had to use the restroom and when I got back in bed, I wasn't able to fall back to sleep, so I tossed and turned until Sissy woke up.

I tried to keep her in bed with me, but she wasn't really having any of that. So, I thought "Whisky Tango Foxtrot???" and lugged my sorry sick ass out of bed.

I think I'll get in the shower just so I don't have to hear the kids' fussing around for a bit. I've raided the medicine chest and picked my assorted poisons today, so maybe I'll be so out of it, I won't notice the screaming, crying and fighting (or maybe I'll be the one screaming, crying and fighting....) You just never know!

Monday, February 8, 2010

The Crock Rocks

We've really been enjoying Crock Pot Sundays around here.

Yesterday, I made Beef Tips and noodles and here's the recipe:

1/2 cup flour
1 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon pepper
4 lbs beef sirloin tips, cubed
1/2 cup chopped green onions
1/2 lb mushrooms, sliced
1 can (10.5 oz size) condensed beef broth
1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
2 teaspoons tomato paste or ketchup
1/4 cup dry red wine or water
3 tablespoons flour
Buttered noodles

Combine the first three ingredients and toss with beef cubes to coat thoroughly. Place in crock pot and add green onions and mushrooms.

Combine beef broth, Worcestershire sauce and tomato paste or ketchup. Pour over beef and vegetables and stir well. Cover and cook on LOW setting for 7 to 12 hours. One hour before serving, turn to HIGH setting. Make a smooth paste of the red wine and 3 tablespoons flour; stir into crock pot, mixing well.

Serve with buttered noodles.

I left out the mushrooms because I don't like them. I used stew beef instead of beef tips (because I couldn't find them). I just marinated the stew beef in red wine in the fridge overnight to tenderize it - came out great. I also used hearty beef broth, because I couldn't find any that said "condensed". I set it on HIGH the entire time and it was ready in 5 hours. It was very good, everyone seemed to like it, except Sissy, but she's our pickiest one.

The recipe states that it serves 8, but I used less beef than called for, and it still fed 6 people!

This one will go into the regular rotation as well. I'll add it to the recipe blog when I get a chance...It's Monday, so who knows when that might be! LOL.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Friday Secrets

I decided that since I didn't have any where to be in particular today, that I would just ease into my day the way I like. So, I lazed around until 9:30 AM, then hopped in the shower. Before I present the Friday Secrets, I will let you know I have a boat load of good topics for next week, so don't forget to check in, mmmmkay?

1. Now that I am almost 36 years old and have been married almost 9 years, I am wishing I had been more sexually adventurous when I was younger. Not sure this would change the way I feel now, but these days it is almost all I can think about.  My husband and I have a very active sex life and he tries to "spice things up" but it's still not satisfying me. I have actually been trying to convince him to let me invite another guy over to join us...not that he's too keen on that at this point, of course. I even told him I'd let him invite another woman over at another time! Meanwhile, back to my fantasies...

2. I wish I could unfollow some of my Twitter friends because they're annoying..but I'm afraid they'd find out & be offended.

3. I once got a BJ from a tranny.  I didn't know until he was done that he was born a woman.  It was still good though...

4. My mom thinks our cat ran away.  But I hit it with the car and put it in the garbage. And I don't feel bad about it.

5. Once I swallowed a marble.  And I got it back.

6. Once I had a pimple on my penis.   My girlfriend thought I was cheating on her because I wouldn't do her or let her blow me until it went away so she cheated on me.

7. I feel broken by all the teasing and snubbing I got going thru school. I wish I could contact each and every person who treated me badly and let them know how awful they made my life.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Your Burning Questions: Answered!

OK, onto the grillin'! This first set of questions were sent by email from a regular reader:

What is the sexiest part of your body? I'm going to have to go with the boobs on this one.

What do you wear when you want to feel sexy? I'm not really a lingerie person, but my corset makes me feel sexy.

I know you've been in a three-some, do you prefer two guys and a girl or two girls and a guy? Two guys and a girl. :-)

What is your favorite color? Purple!

Who is your hero? The Evil Twin. He is kind, courageous, and loving, but won't back down in the face of doing the right thing or standing by his convictions. He has also made me a better person.

What inspires you? I think the knowledge that so many people deal with greater challenges than I do on a daily basis - it inspires me to be grateful for my own situation and not complain because I know it could be worse.

Finally, do you spit or do you swallow? Neither. That's what the towel drawer is for!

From Ron:
What are you personal preferences as far as sex toys are concerned? I mean powered, un-powered, length, girth, colors? Not much of a toy person, really, but if I'm choosing, I'll take a regular dildo any day.


Karen asked...
How did you meet the Evil Twin? Is he actually a twin? We met through a mutual friend, although we knew OF each other prior to meeting. And, no he is not a twin. He used that pen name when he did underground comic work. Some of it was so over the top disgusting, his roommate at the time suggested he pick up the moniker so he could blame "his Evil Twin" for the rude and crass cartoons (thus shedding himself of the blame! LOL).

Vinomom said...
I know pretty much everything. But just for fun - What is your MOST embarrassing moment? Geez, I've had more than my fair share of embarrassing moments! I worked at the mall when I was in high school and entered the elevator to find a very large family - at least 6 children and an infant. I asked them if they were all theirs and they said yes. And, then...I looked at the mom and said "And you're having another?" (she hadn't lost all the pregnancy weight). "Um, no." she replied. **Crickets** I learned to not ask that question unless I see a head crowning between a chicks legs!

Dave asked...

Question: RE: the 39 weeks pregnant pose on Tuesday. Were there any others of a more Demi Moore "Vanity Fair" cover nature? Oh, yes. I had the Evil Twin take many photos. In most of them, I'm completely nude, but have my arms across my chest, so they are tastefully done black and whites.

And that'll do it. I put my answers in italics and I hope I have all the links right. Fun (and difficult) questions this time around! But, I had fun playing!

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

You Can Be The Star!

Not that I think I am the star around here anyway...This is just my little dusty corner of the web where I come and vent my spleen or blather on and on about the nonsense that happens to be my life. I know you're jealous!

I've noticed that I have some new commenters and new people stopping by who don't leave comments (and that's fine, too.).

However, since I do have some new readers - and I have done this in the past - I figured it was about time to open the floor for questions. You can ask in the comments or if you'd rather be more anonymous, you can email me at eviltwinswife@gmail.com.



Have a burning question? Ask away. If you have a burning anything else, keep it to yourself please!

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

It's The Age of Aquarius

Today marks my second baby's birthday. She's four today! I can't believe it's been four years already.

Sissy was my 9th pregnancy. She was born at 39 weeks (full term), 7lbs, 5 oz and almost 20 inches long. This was after I had been diagnosed with a blood clotting disorder that leads to miscarriage.

The "cure" for this disorder is blood thinner in the order of injections to the belly twice a day for the duration of the pregnancy.

The day I found out I was pregnant with her was the day of Buddy's last day of school and the school picnic. I came home, hot and frazzled, since the picnic takes place at a local park. It was the end of his first grade year. I really wanted some wine for the evening, but decided to take a pregnancy test...I mean, we had been trying, so even though my monthly friend wasn't due for another 5 days, I figured better to be safe than sorry.

Besides, I had a boat load of the $1 pregnancy sticks from the Dollar Store. I almost passed out when I saw 2 lines!

Luckily, I still had Lovenox (the blood thinner injection) left over from the failed pregnancy before and I had enough to get me started. I did my first injection that night.

Now, regular old time readers will know that needles don't bother me - I had been injecting myself daily for 7 years at that point with the medication I take to manage my MS. I went off that injection and onto Lovenox - instead of one injection a day, I now had TWO. Lucky me!

I went into the obs office the next morning for blood work, then again 2 days later. Everything looked great. A few weeks later, I had my first ultrasound that showed a strong heartbeat and a healthy little bean.

Because of my high risk (age, medical problems), I was closely monitored and even rented a hospital grade fetal doppler, so I could listen to her heart beat as much as I wanted. I typically did it in the morning and again before I went to bed.

I had about 25 ultrasounds with her. We knew she was a girl from early on. I refused all testing other than ultrasounds because I don't trust those tests (that's a whole different blog - I'll spare you the details for now).

As time drew near, we scheduled the c-section for February 2. I already had a January baby and the garnet birthstone. I wanted that pretty amethyst too! LOL.

After 39 weeks, I was a mess of bruises:



I had gained 13 lbs (not for lack of trying, though - I had a very healthy appetite!). Those are size 4 maternity jeans from the Gap - the only place I could find clothes to fit.

The Evil Twin and I made the trek to the hospital early. The nurses came in to shave me, but we all know I take care of that business myself. The one nurse said, "You don't have to bother, she's done the work herself." LOL. I'm serious, you honestly lose all manner of modesty when having a baby is involved.

Once again, the Evil Twin held my hand and sat by my side during the operation. My OB pulled her out and waggled her over the screen and said, "Hi, Mommy!" She was a mess! But so lovely. A lovely, lovely mess.

She was born on Thursday morning around 10:50 am and we were discharged from the hospital on Saturday. I don't think I laid her down for more than a few minutes the entire time! I loved on her, nursed her, slept with her in my arms, ate my meals while she nursed and longed to be home with my family. My WHOLE family. All four of us. I knew we were complete.



What a fat little sweetie! :-)

And now, she is four! She loves to color. She loves Spongebob. She loves photography, so she got a REAL (not a kiddie) camera for her birthday:



It's a 10 mp with all the bells and whistles. I found it for the same price as the 1.3 mp "kiddie" cameras and felt like, "WTH?" Get her the nicer one. She's very gentle with it and LOVES capturing all her favorite things.

She's my baby, but she's also my big girl. I love her more than I can express. Plus, we have cake for after dinner tonight! I love cake, too. LOL.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Monday Blahs

Yeah, it hasn't been a stellar Monday morning for me. It's colder than a witches teat here and I can't seem to get my thoughts together. I have lots of little picky-uny things that need to be taken care of (and yes, I'm ending that sentence with a preposition because I am just that lackadaisical this morning.)

My slacker tendencies aside, I stuck with my guns over the weekend and planned Crock Pot Sunday.

We had quite a bit of snow here on Saturday morning and it continued to snow during the day, so instead of going out for our special Saturday treat, I whipped up some meatballs and made spaghetti and garlic bread.

I had searched the interwebs last weekend to find a crock pot recipe with ingredients I felt the entire family would be likely to eat.

I found a recipe for "Creamy Chicken and Veggies". It's actually a very easy recipe because there are lots of options.

Basically, choose your favorite veggies: in my case I used baby carrots, red new potatoes and some onion.

Then, decide on the kind of chicken you want to use: legs, wings, etc. I used boneless skinless chicken breast.

After that, choose a "cream of" soup. I picked cream of mushroom. Alternately, you could use the "Simmer Sauces" made for stir fry, but I couldn't find any of those.

You put in the veggies, layer the chicken on top (I had 4 pieces), then put the "cream of" soup on.

Optionally, you can add garlic or ginger. I threw in about a teaspoon of minced garlic and towards the end, I added salt, pepper and paprika (just sprinkled a bit over top).

Do not add water, the slow cooking will retain enough fluid.

Put the lid on and that's it! Cook for 3-4 hours on high or 6-8 on low.

Now, I must say that this dish didn't look very appealing at serving time, but it was very tasty and it will be put into the rotation of crock pot meals.

I'll add this to my The Glamorous Recipes site later on! :-)