Thursday, September 30, 2010

Not Moving Fast Enough

I just can't get motivated this morning. I had a great night's sleep and woke early - earlier than normal, in fact. I feel good, but I'm just moving slow.

My "to do" list increases by the minute and I just need a break to catch up.

Yawn! It's a dreary day here. All overcast and such. I'm just waiting to see what's next really.

I had my hair did yesterday.

It turned out super-cute!


It's reeeeaaallly purple this time. I hope it lasts for a while!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Feeling Groovy

After I dropped Sissy off at preschool, I had a few errands to run. Driving around on a random Tuesday, I realized that I love this place. I love that I drive down by the Kanawha River almost everyday.

I love that we can sit on our front lawn and watch the fireworks that the City does every July 4th and not have to get stuck in the crowd and traffic. Want another glass of wine? No need to hide it, I just walk in my front door and bring it out. Heck, I could bring out an entire bottle and no one would give 2 shakes of a lambs tail over it.

Also, this morning at preschool drop off, it was very chilly. I had no idea HOW chilly it was, so I schlep Sissy and I off with jeans and short sleeve shirts (no lightweight jacket or anything!). One of the other moms saw Sissy trying to huddle up to my no-jacket-wearing-Mother-of-the-Year self and had her little boy on her lap, cuddled up under her hoodie. She asked if Sissy wanted to share it, too.

Sissy, never being one to be shy, hopped up on that moms' lap and got comfy. I just said a silent prayer in my head that the mom didn't smoke. I certainly don't care if people do or don't. The Evil Twin was a champion smoker for more than 16 years and quit 5 years ago. But, Sissy isn't used to being around smokers and so when she is, YOU GOT IT - she comments. It's usually something like "You smell funny." to the even more cringeworthy "Ewww, you stink like smoke."

I've explained over and over: Some people smoke, some people don't. People who do smoke often have smoke smells on their clothes or hands or even breath, but we needn't call them out on it.

Either this nice gal was not a smoker or Sissy has learned from our frequent talks. But, wasn't that a nice gesture? To hold my child in her jacket and put her arm around her.

So, that got my day off to a great start and then, as I said, realizing how lucky we are to live in such a quiet, beautiful, (but not flashy - think Mayberry-ish) town, where we are also conveniently located for shopping, dining, just about anything you can think of. Except hotels. We don't have any of those.

Something just clicked in my head this morning. I'm FINALLY used to my routine. Sure, it can be hectic, but I think I'm finally settling into it. It only took just over a month! I have a clear idea of what needs to be done and how to go about it in the most efficient manner possible. I know I'll have set backs, but I have a path, and that's all I need.

Monday, September 27, 2010

Hello, Monday (my NOT friend)

I feel like there was no weekend at all, but we DID have a lovely time hanging out with a good friend we haven't seen in a while on Saturday night. I guess that just eclipsed the entire weekend, because it was that great (the visit, that is).

The Evil Twin woke me up this AM at around 6:40. I woke Buddy up, fixed his cereal and then got on task to make the Evil Twin's lunch.

Lately, he has been enjoying the Hillshire Farms pastrami. Just smelling it makes me want to "lose" my lunch - even if it's prior to breakfast when I smell it.

That shit just does not smell right. I know many people adore pastrami. Bella The Cat loves pastrami. ETW won't even try the pastrami because it smells weird.

I wanted to get back in bed soooo much, but no! Here comes Sissy asking if its time to get up. I say, "No." but she just makes herself at home on the couch. :::Sigh:::

The boys leave for work/school (that means the Evil Twin and Buddy head out the door for their respective destinations) and I wish them a good day, etc. etc. Then it's shower time.

There are many moms who show up to the preschool drop off wearing PJ pants (we're talking 10:45A here), but I show up fully showered, made up, wearing my Vera Wang shoes and I GET DIRTY LOOKS!

Hell, even my four year old stated "Mommy, you look stylish." Why, thank you for that, because apparently, I am a target for scorn for others.

I hope I never fit in.

Friday, September 24, 2010

FridaySecrets Sept. 24

Here are the Friday Secrets and bonus Mystery Pic! I just love Fridays!

1. When everyone congratulates this girl I know for being pregnant, I just laugh. I know babies should be joyous times but either it's going to be a girl and an insane slut like she is or a boy and be a potential serial killer because the chick hates men so much. Really I'm pulling for a boy because at least then there's a hope that interventions will be made by teachers etc and the kid will have a chance.

2. One of the big reasons I'm staying at my current job is because they'll pay for me to go back to school to finish a degree for another job.

3. I really don't give a flaming fark about football.

4. Sometimes I wonder if I do good deeds because of the praise I get or if it's because I do them for the sake of doing them. I'm pretty sure it's just because it's the right thing to do, but the thank yous are nice.

And, the mystery pic: (a hot one, for sure):


This should make everyone's day. And, you're off the hook for viewing boil/zit/pimple popping videos for next week. Whew! You all came scary close to the worst I have to offer.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Glad For A New Day

Yesterday was just a killer. First, I had an important phone call, but it made me late on taking Sissy to preschool.

Then, I came home and did some cleaning. While scrubbing the bathtub, the removable shower head flew off and conked me on the bean (hard!). I thought I might have had a gash on my head, but no. Just enough to hurt and make me see a few stars.

I did a few more things around the house, then headed to see my ex/new boss and pick up some things for him and get his grocery list for the week. When I arrived, we were just chatting as I went on about my work. Then, he didn't look so good.

I asked if he was okay, but he stated that he thought he was having a stroke (he's had several before, that's why I help out around his house). His breathing was labored and he seemed to be in serious pain.

Well, I wasn't going to leave him like that, so I called his son for directives and then called 911. The paramedics arrived and checked him over. He wasn't having a stroke, but his blood sugar was high, which can mimic stroke-like activity.

In the meantime, I called the preschool and let them know I would be late to pick up Sissy, which they were very accommodating about the situation. I felt lousy dropping her off late and picking her up late (it was less than 10 minutes each way, so I wasn't TOO much of a bother, I hope).

So, things were a bit hectic and after all that, I still needed to hit the grocery. My poor nerves had already been shot, so I blew it off for the day.

See, I'm still not supposed to be lifting any substantial weight (more than 10 pounds), I'll pick up Buddy from school and the three of us (me, Sissy and him) will go shopping where he can help me with the lifting. That's just the way the crackers crumble these days, my friends. I have to use my son for slave labor.

Oh well, he'll be a grown up before I know it and have his own family and have to do the yardwork and all the crappy heavy jobs that guys have to do. Might as well get used to it early! :-)

On a completely unrelated note, I took the most gorgeous picture of Bella the other day - and that's not a brag on my photography skillz, that is just saying that she is quite possibly the most beautiful creature on the planet (catwise, anyway). Check it out:


Happy Thursday, hooligans and don't FORGET about FRIDAY SECRETS: eviltwinswife@gmail.com. I'll have 'em up around 9:30A-ish or so. Send them in! I mean it. Or I will post zit videos all next week. You've been warned.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

One of My Favorite Songs

The Evil Twin sent me this video in an email this morning.

This chick seems sweet and she's obviously dedicated, if not a bit misguided.

It reminds me of the American Idol contestants who have family and friends saying they have a lovely voice when they really just do not.

I know I can't sing, and therefore, you will never see me on YouTube paying tribute to a song I love.



FREEBIRD!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Weekend Encounter with a Moron

Morons are everywhere. In every state. I seem to be a moron magnet.

Sunday morning, I decided to run to Tudor's Biscuit World (a local fast food restaurant chain that has breakfast and lunches available). It's also extremely tasty. They are best known for their biscuits.

When I pulled into the lot, I saw that the drive thru line was a mile long, so I decided to park and just go into the place to order the food to go.

I pulled into an available spot, but I was kind of off center, so I backed up my van, straightened it out and pulled back in. I was doing, perhaps, 1 mile while attempting to do the right thing and not be a spot hogging idiot.

To my left, there was a Jeep Grand Cherokee parked with a man inside. He was gnawing on a biscuit... Whatever.

After I turned my engine off, he approached my van and claimed that I had "hit" his vehicle. I didn't feel anything, even though he said his jeep "jiggled". Yes, my short wheel base van could do major damage to a large SUV.... Right? I just offered up my insurance and registration info, but he said no. He wanted a police report.

I said fine and got out of my van to take pictures and video of both vehicles for insurance purposes. I noticed his vehicle already had extensive damage on that side - all the way down both doors and there were rust spots. IF I did, in fact, tap him, there wouldn't be that much damage.

As I was documenting the "damage", he was constantly screaming at me that I could not violate his privacy by gathering photographic or video of him in his "private property" (the jeep). I was documenting the existing damage. On public property.

Two officers arrived at the scene and the officer I dealt with was very professional and polite. He said (and I quote) that the other party was "Just being a butthole" and that I had every right to take pictures/video of anything I wanted to on public property. Furthermore, he stated that for this type of situation, the police were not needed. We only needed to exchange insurance information and move on.

I had OFFERED the insurance info right off the bat. The Hick didn't think that was good enough and called the police.

You know what? If I did indeed damage your vehicle - that's my fault and I will own up to that. I'm not the best parker (or driver, for that matter). But, in the nearly 20 years the Evil Twin and I have been together and had joint car insurance, we have never filed a claim that was on our record (the other things being people who have hit our cars).

So, now the cops are involved. They inspect both vehicles an only find a minor scrap on my front fender - and surprisingly, no corresponding damage to his vehicle.

Monday morning, I spent 2 hours on the phone with his insurance and my insurance going over the details.

Then, I dropped Sissy off at preschool and had lunch with a friend. Bliss!

I came home to a voice message from HIS insurance company. He had called in and said that he was only worried about the damage to my van (which he didn't see until much later) and he didn't want to be liable for that incident. OK, idiot, if I hit you, as you claimed, how would you be responsible for the damage to MY car?? Dumbass, you were parked and not in motion. Let's see..... How COULD you be responsible for that little scuff mark on my car?

Anyhoot, he said he was NOT filing a claim because his Jeep had no damage. But, I have him on video tape screaming at me that "You HIT my car!" and "You better not go anywhere." I was outside my van, where would I be going?

The officer I dealt with wouldn't even list our phone number on The Hick's report. The officer said, "He seems unstable and I don't want him harassing you." Even though anyone with half a brain could look at the report, then look at the phone directory and find our number. I suspect he can't spell our last name, even while looking at a paper in front of him.

When I posted this info on Facebook, I had a comment that while the situation was not cool, the judgement (sic) on this person "saddened" the commenter and she unfriended me. I thanked her for that, because it saved me the trouble of unfriending her. I mean, please, you cannot insult me. I simply don't care. But, if you mess with me or mine, like Toothless Hick did, you will incur the full wrath of my being.

If anyone feels that is "counterintuitive" or unfair, feel free to not come back! Don't let the mouse "hit" your ass on the way out! :-)

Happy Tuesday, hooligans!

Monday, September 20, 2010

You Take the Good, You Take the Bad

And there you have: The Facts of Life. Right? I loved that show back in the day.

I had a weekend chock full of the good and the bad and I will ruminate on all that later on this week. I have to pace myself, ya know?

First off, you may have noticed - or not - that I didn't post Friday Secrets on Friday. I'm saving them for this coming Friday, so there is still time to send something in to yours truly: eviltwinswife@gmail.com. I had some other venting of my spleen for last week. I can't even remember what it was at this point.

Ah, the joys of the menopausal short term memory letting me down.

The shower beckons me. I hope you hooligans have a happy Monday!

Friday, September 17, 2010

What Is This?

We live on a little dead end piece of road, but at our location, we can see the road that runs perpendicular to ours.

So, there is a house I see out my kitchen window every day. Lately, there has been a new development over there:


They have been doing some tree removal activities, but what is with all the trash cans? Trash pick up day is Thursday. This picture was taken on Thursday evening - our trash service is not only the BEST around, but they also arrive very early in the morning.

This "mystery pile" is still out there today. Only, the trash can on the right is now on the "mystery pile" as well. I was too lazy to go out and take more clandestine photos earlier. But, really? Do I care? She works during the day and I'm here being all Mrs. Kravitz and junk.

These people should be THANKFUL for my nosy nature. They're less likely to be robbed or whatever if I have the watchful "neighborhood patrol" eye on them on.

Yeah, that's my story!

Thursday, September 16, 2010

From One End of the Valley

...to the other.

That was my schedule this morning. I had to go see my OB - his assistant looked at my oozy boo boo and proclaimed it not infected. I'm to wash it twice a day with antibacterial soap and use Bacitracin. When I got home, I dug around in the medicine cabinet and lo and behold, we actually had a tube!

She said I didn't need to put a band-aid over it, but if I don't, it leaves an oozy mark on my shirt - right around the belly button area. Yuck! I have another couple of days on the antibiotics and hopefully, this little oozy thing will heal up soon. It's making me sick!

Apparently, I'm good watching pus and ooze on youtube videos, but not so great at dealing with it when it's on my person.

After that, I had to drop Sissy off at preschool, then head back to the other side of the valley (indeed, a different county, too) to see my primary care physician.

Somehow, I managed to gain a pound and a half between doctor visits! Damn those chunky, but cute as heck, sandals I love so much. I think it might have been the change of clothes (I had a lightweight skirt on to see the OB, but changed into jean shorts, and I have to wear a belt with them - or they'll be falling off of me! - that must have added some bulk!).

So, PCP (primary care physician) is upping my high blood pressure med to the 50 mg instead of the 25 mg I had been taking. I also sat there bravely and got a flu shot - new and improved with the H1N1 vaccine, too! I made him look at my oozy sore, too. I know he enjoyed that. I saw the pizza delivery guy go in the back shortly before I did. Hee hee.

Surely, he should have no problem eating after seeing that. After all, I haven't heard that Ron's doc has gone on a hunger strike after seeing his infected nut-sac. I guess they really do see everything!

Of course, as soon as I dropped Sissy off, the rain started, and kept on going. And going.

Today would be the perfect day to snuggle in and just stay home. Instead, I got to go on the "Oozy Sore Tour Across Two Counties".

Now, I have to go pick up the World's Most Beautiful Girl from school and an hour later, I pick up the World's Smartest Boy from school.

Running in and out of this rain, I'll be looking like Roseanne Roseannadanna. May as well pull my hair back and call it a day!


I know my insurance officially hates me by now. And we've only been on this plan since July. LOL.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Ugh!

I do not, nor will I ever regret my decision to have the hysterectomy, but typical for me, things have not gone "the usual way". Something about me - my internal sensors or something - usually means something will be amiss.

That's just my MO. I have one incision spot (the one at the belly button location) that isn't looking so hot. The other three are healing up nicely. When I called my OB/GYN to let them know of the oozing, they prescribed an antibiotic and told me to clean it with hydrogen peroxide, which I have been doing. At least twice a day when I change the bandages.

So many of my shirts had belly button location blood spots, I've resorted to the big bandages. Which seem helpful. I guess.

I see my regular family physician tomorrow for a routine follow up exam, so I think I'll let him scope it out and get his advice. If necessary, I'll call my OBs office back and make an early than expected appointment for the post surgery follow up exam.

I'm sure everything is fine, but my goodness! When will I have a day where I take Sissy to preschool, drop her off, return home and get some things done around the house? So far this year, I have not had ONE day where she was in preschool and I didn't have anything else on the burner.

I know time will fly and next year will be better - with her in school all day for Kindergarten, but it will still be a challenge, time wise.

Tomorrow, I have more ranting and raving to do. I am astounded by stupidity on all sides of me! How do people even get along in life??

The up side is it gives me stuff to write about! :-)

Happy Wednesday, hooligans (Wednesday of the longest week EVAH!)

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

There Are Days

Days I would like to remove my spine and crack it in all manner of ways. Then, put it back in.

I DO have a back cracking system that seems to work for me most of the time.

But, I have to roll around in bed, doing odd contortions to get the best results. It's a good thing that I am so limber. Yes, I'm 42 and can still put both legs behind my neck.

The Evil Twin gets to see me contort myself into all kinds of odd positions (while dressed, so get yer minds out of the gutter).

Maybe a super duper hot shower will help. Ya think?

I'm ready. Are you ready for the day?

Happy Tuesday, hooligans!


Monday, September 13, 2010

An Interesting Convo at the Hospital

OK, if y'all keep up with anything around here, you know I was in the hospital on Friday 9/3 and home by Saturday 9/4.

Since I was being shuffled all around the place on Friday, they advised me to bring nothing with me since I wouldn't have family/friends there the whole time (Yo, the Evil Twin had to take care of the kids and pick up Buddy from school), I packed up a bag the night before that the Evil Twin could bring to my regular room when he and the kids visited later on Friday afternoon.

I packed all my meds and fresh undies, etc. Since I do have to take an injectible medication for my MS, I always have that on hand when I'm away from home because so few people (including nurses) know what it is and what it's for and even how to administer it. I prefer to do my own injections.

On Saturday AM, the nurse came by with my usual AM meds (even though I had my own in my bag, which was in a locker across the room and I was tethered to so many cords, I couldn't get up without help from a nurse). And. she's going over my extensive meds on her wheely computer thingy-doo (I think that's the technical term).

This was our exchange:

Her: You're supposed to have 20 i.u. of ......Co...pa

Me: Copaxone, it's for MS. It's a once daily sub q injection.

Her: Did you take it?

Me: No, its in my overnight bag in the locker and I couldn't get to it.

Her: Why didn't you call for a nurse to get it?

Me: I didn't want to bother anyone. (Real answer: I didn't want to wait 2 hours for a human to retrieve the bag so I could do my injection myself).

Her: Do you want to take it now? (remember, this is Saturday MORNING).

Me: No, I only take it around 9 pm at night. That's my schedule.

She gives me a sideways look, but I assure her I'll be fine.

Then, she hands me a cup of meds, including Gas X. I KNOW my MD did not order that for me, I think it was for my neighbor roommate. I just ate whatever shit they gave me, noticing that my pills were one short of a freaking Ativan. They probably gave that to my neighbor, even though I had ALL my pills on hand (if I could have REACHED them).

And now, instead of buying tampons, I'll be paying off this hospital bill for a few years. Thank goodness, I can funnel the tampon money to that!

Why does everything need to be such a hassle?

Happy Monday, hooligans!

Friday, September 10, 2010

Friday Secrets September 10

I received a few secrets this week - and, as always, they are worth taking the time to reflect upon and read. I appreciate people taking the time to email me and I hope that by "getting it out there", it also helps them to get some peace or to just let it go or whatever it is they need to walk away from these secrets.

1.


2. While enjoying the hot tub one night, the wife & I decided going sans bathing suits.  Somehow, the subject of 'hair maintenance' came up.  During this discussion, I distinctly remember being dared to do a little 'manscaping'.  Not being one to turn down a reasonable dare, I got down to business the next day.  Not being a really hairy guy to begin with, when it came to deciding on just where the border should be it was easy to justify taking it all off.

My wife's reaction was one of surprise.  She had no recollection of making the dare which was a testament to, well, a whole different issue.  Unfortunately, the reaction I was hoping for (way more white hot monkey sex sessions) has not come to pass, yet.  It hasn't enticed her into doing a little bushwacking either.  In any event, I kinda like the condition and rather than let everything grow back, I've been maintaining the bare skinned look.  All I can say is, make sure you use a sensitive skin variety having cream.  Dry shaving, even in the shower, leads to discomfort.

(Yes, I realize this would make a lovely mystery pic.  You'll just have to be patient while I work up the nerve to share.)

3. I'm actually glad our sex life isn't as much a major part of our relationship as it once was... the sex is still great but I'm thankful to have my best friend back.

4. Here's a funny one for you:

Years ago, I was dating a guy and decided to move in with him.  About 2-3 weeks into our cohabitation, I woke up one morning realizing I was pissing the bed!  I was having a dream that I was sitting on the toilet, and apparently the dream was a little too realistic.  Luckily it was on my side of the bed, and I was able to hide it until he got up - then I changed the sheets. 

And here's a sad one for you:

When I was a kid, I was sexually abused by an older man.  It was over 30 years ago (he's 82 now), but I check the obituaries regularly, because when I see his, I'm going to have a party.

From yours truly: I have something (dust or an eyelash...who knows?) in my left eye, so I'm having a tough time doing proofreading. I will check later when my eyeball no longer has an irritating intruder and clean up any typos or whatnot.

Happy Happy Friday, hooligans! :-)

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Never a Dull Moment....

Yesterday, I mentioned a prescription for antibiotic.

Before I could pick that up yesterday, the belly button incision decided to mutiny on me and ooze some blood too. Awesome! Unfortunately the Dora the Explorer band aid I put over it didn't do the trick and I had a nasty stain on my shirt after I dropped Sissy off at preschool, and before I had to get to the grocers. Good times.

Along with my prescription, I picked up more bandages. It's like a war zone on my abdomen. When I pull my shirt up to inspect the carnage, Sissy says, "Ewww Mommy, put your shirt down. No one wants to see your dirty belly. Just...ewww."

Ahhh, how she makes me feel like a princess. Truly, what would I do without her and her sage advice???

This is the first day I've been able to drop her off at preschool and come right back home. Of course, I have work I need to do around here, but I'm procrastinating a little as I enjoy a moment of "free time". The free time I haven't had since the middle of Buddy's 2nd grade year.

I will soon be back to my familiar hausfrau duties - but I also pencil in a little "Ladies who Lunch" every now and again. Need a lunch date? I'm your gal! :-)

PS - Don't forget "Friday Secrets". You can send an anonymous email to eviltwinswife@gmail.com. I copy and paste the secrets into a word document, then delete the email. If I don't get any secrets, I'll be forced to recount my bitter 6 year battle with the Post Office (that I won!) - and that might be very boring for you all, cause it only involves me, my happiness and my ruthless quest to get my way at all costs.

Send in them secrets! I know they're eating you alive!!!:-)


Wednesday, September 8, 2010

I'm A Walking Pharmacy!

After I arrived home on Saturday (the day after my surgery), I took a shower and got dressed in real clothes. Something happened - I'm not sure what - but the incision on the right side started oozing a bit of blood.

It wasn't excessive or anything, so I just put a medium sized Band-Aid pad on it and kept checking it.

There was very little blood loss and nothing "unusual" looking, so I waited to call my doctor on Tuesday morning. I got a call back later in the day from his nurse that they were calling in a prescription for antibiotics and that I'm to clean the area with hydrogen peroxide. No big deal.

I just need to toss in a few more pills a day for a while. I really don't care, if it means I won't have some sort of crazy infection.

I'll just keep on keeping on. That's my MO. I'm a trooper.

I've also weaned myself down to only 1 Oxycodone a day. I take my one very early in the AM when I get up to use the restroom, then go back to bed, so I sleep most of it off. Those things make me sleepy and itchy - especially my face.

But, I feel better and better every day. I have not had the night sweats once since the operation! I'm not sure if that's normal or not, but I sure do like it!

I have to get off here, get a shower and be ready for my daily errands. :-)

I'm just SO happy! (which just proves the uterus is an evil entity - Damn Eve for eating that apple!) LOL.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Coming Right Along....

Today is my first day alone since the surgery. Sissy is here, but has preschool from 10:45 to 1:55. I need to run by my part time boss' house and pick up some stuff, then run by the bank. Then, I can come back home to chill for a bit.

I can't wait until I have NO errands to run during the 3 hour preschool session and I can enjoy some down time - just to myself. Maybe even eat lunch! That would be a novel idea.

Typically, I eat my blueberry Activia for breakfast, I'm lucky to have lunch, then I have to prep something for dinner. However, the Evil Twin doesn't want me standing at the stove to cook dinner, so we've had lots of take out since my surgery.

Honestly, I'm about sick of all fast food offerings, I'm sick of the normal dinners I prepare. I would seriously be happy with a good salad for dinner every day. Maybe with a few croutons or something. And real bacon bits (I make those myself).

I have to get in the shower before too long and get ready for my big day of being alone for a bit! It's all good!

Happy Tuesday, hooligans!

Monday, September 6, 2010

Happy As A Clam!

Actually, I never really understood that saying. Are clams really all that happy? Well, if they are then I am just as happy.

I went in the hospital Friday morning. Found out my surgery had been pushed back an hour (instead of noon, I was scheduled for 1P). Ah, one more hour of starving and dying from thirst. I wasn't allowed to have food or water past midnight the night before.

The no food part didn't bother me as much as the no water part. I don't know how many ounces my cup holds, but I drink at least 4 of them with ice every morning before I can even think about getting moving for the day. I brushed my teeth and swished some water in my mouth, but that didn't really cut it.

They got me set up in a holding area - the Evil Twin and Sissy came back for a bit then took my clothes and shoes back home. I had packed up a backpack of things the night before, so I just told them to put the stuff in the backpack and that was what I would wear home the next day.

Finally, I was wheeled to another holding area where I got an IV line started, spoke to the anesthesiologist, spoke to a nurse about what to expect and finally, spoke to my doctor, who signed off on the paperwork.

Shortly thereafter, I was wheeled into the OR for the fancy da Vinci robotic hysterectomy procedure. The doctor sits at a console and directs the robot arms to do what needs to be done. Once the uterus is free of the other things it's attached to, the robotic arms shove it down. It comes out the hooha and then onto pathology! Cool, huh? Hopefully, my doc took pics and they'll be in my file when I go in for my 6 week follow up.

When I woke up, they told me my ovaries looked good, so he left those! Yay! (he had said previously that he would only take them if they looked bad). After an hour or so in recovery, I woke up, well, kinda. They were still waiting to get a bed in a regular room for me. I just kept going in and out. The nurse did offer me a cup of ice and it was SO GOOD! I clung to that cup of ice like a monkey on its momma.

Finally, I got a room and they parked the gurney outside the door. I was in bed 2, which meant bed 1 was closest to the door and I was closest to the window in back. They asked if I could walk, I said "Sure!" and I did. I got right up and walked to the hospital bed. The nurses got me all situated and comfy. Someone (I'm sure it was an angel) brought me a huge plastic cup filled with ice and water.

They had inserted a catheter after I had been knocked out in the OR and didn't even realize it! So, I drank as much water as I could hold!

Every now and again, a nurse would drop by to put some pain meds in my IV, so I was in and out of it most of the evening. I did, however, ask that the catheter be removed, so I could get up and use the rest room myself.

I had NO pain, whatsoever. I was (and still am) sore, like I just did 400 situps or something. But, pain? Nothing. I have four tiny (inch long) incisions on my abdomen. Plenty of bruising and I would add a picture, but it's scary looking, so I'll spare you.

The next morning (Saturday), my doctor came to check on me and said if I could eat solid foods and keep it down, I was free to go! I had a yummy breakfast around 8:30, still felt great and the nurse started on my discharge paperwork. I was back in my own home by 11:30A!!!

I've had a minimal amount of spotting after peeing, but that's it. No heavy lifting, sex (sorry TMI) or tub baths for 6 weeks, but I can drive and go about my normal routine as I feel up to it.

I was sent home with a script for Tylox (Tylenol 4 w/codeine), but the pharmacy substituted Oxycodone instead. It staves off the soreness when it gets to the uncomfortable sore stage - which almost never happens.

The da Vinci robotic surgery can be applied in many other surgeries, not just hysterectomies and I would highly encourage any one facing abdominal surgery to look into it and see if it's right for you. (and no, I'm not getting paid to say that - it's just THAT much easier than a traditional abdominal surgery - and I should know, I've had 2 c-sections and one laparotomy (c-section like cut, but not cut into the uterus).

I've just been kinda taking it easy for a few days now. I hope to be back to my old routine in a week or so! I am SO glad I had this surgery.

I'm offa here for more R&R.

Happy Labor Day Monday, hooligans!

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Officially "Too Busy"

Today is an early out for Buddy - that means I need to pick him up at 12:45. Because it's an early out for the bigger kids, there is no preschool today.

Remember when I mentioned my part time job from home? Well, since then, the family has asked me to grocery shop for my boss and clean his house once a week on top of the other task I was originally hired to do. Of course, they pay me for doing the extra things and I'm fine with that.

However, this week has been just crazy here. I clean on Thursdays, but he needs groceries today too - that's fine, I need a few things myself. But, see above - that early out is going to put a crimp in my schedule. Plus, I'll be dragging Sissy along with me for it all.

I think what I'll do is: get the groceries, go by, drop those off, then go pick up Buddy and drop him back at the house (he's old enough to stay by himself these days, plus, I'll only be 2 miles down the road). Then, go back with Sissy and tidy up the house.

So, sort of a "split shift" kinda deal, but it's the only way I can get around that early out and still have time to clean.

There! Am I clever or what? (don't answer that). And yes, I know Buddy could and can walk home - many kids do. But, it's a busy road and I worry about a car careening off the road and into the crowd of children. (I know, I'm the "worst case scenario" type). Besides, he doesn't have his cell phone today.

On top of all this, I still have a boat load of work to do around here, too, before tomorrow. I'll be down for the count over the weekend, I'm sure.

There will be no Friday Secrets this week and I don't know if I can wrangle the Evil Twin into posting an update after my surgery tomorrow, so it'll most likely be Saturday before I'm back.

But, don't worry - this surgery is very safe and much less invasive than a traditional hysterectomy (it's called the da Vinci Robotic Hysterectomy). In fact, the doctor says I should be able to resume my normal activities in a week, there are no restrictions on driving at all, but I can't lift anything over 20lbs for 6 weeks and the Evil Twin will have to rely on his best girl, "Jackie", for 6 weeks also. Other than that, I just have to take it easy for a day or so. Then, I can start doing small things as I feel up to it.

So, Happy Thursday, hooligans! I'll see ya in a day or so! :-)


Wednesday, September 1, 2010

I'm Not Eating That

I've mentioned here before that I was an ovo-lacto vegetarian for 9 years (that means I ate nothing with a face, but I did eat eggs, cheese and drink milk).

I craved a regular taco - one not made with tofu - for the entire 9 years, but refused to give up my lifestyle choice.

I still like ordering vegetarian choices when we go out to eat, if I have that option. Of course, I also love Wendy's like a hobo loves wine. A single with cheese only is my downfall.

Well, yesterday, while shopping at the Mart, I went over by the deli section and saw a tasty looking "Southwest Salad". Figured it would be a good lunch and put it in my cart.

When I got home and opened it, I found several sketchy strips of grilled chicken on the salad. I would not have bought it if I knew it had chicken on it, but the chicken strips were covered by a packet of tortilla strips and a small container of pico de gallo.

I carefully picked out all the chicken strips. I don't care for chicken and I especially don't care for cold, grilled chicken.

Yes, the salad was in a cooler, but let's face it....That salad could have been sitting there for HOURS.

In my own personal interest of not wanting food poisoning - especially just days before my long awaited and much wanted surgery - well, I had no intentions of eating that dicey questionable chicken.

Instead, I broke off little pieces of the strips and threw them to Bella, so I could eat my yummy NO MEAT salad in peace.

It was quite tasty, but I was ready for tacos for dinner - real tacos, not tofu tacos like I used to eat. Yum!

I have just enough taco meat and one shell left over for a yummy lunch today! That is, if I have time for lunch today. It's not looking likely, but I shall try!

On a side note, I was looking for the Marketside Grab and Go sammiches, but all they had was chicken salad. Me no likey chicken salad, so I set my sights on the regular salads. Later, the Evil Twin informed me that the Grab and Go sandwiches had been recalled for listeria! Hope the cat doesn't get sick! (actually, they have much tougher stomachs than us mere humans and she seems fiesty as ever). Eeeek!

Happy Wednesday, hooligans!