Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Ready to Give Up! (Updated!)

Ugh. I went to WalMart on Monday, as is my usual shopping routine. I had a large list and picked up everything.

When I got home and started putting the groceries away, I realized that I only had two cheese slices left.

For the uninitiated, I lovingly make the Evil Twin's lunch every day except Wednesdays, which is when he and his co-workers head to a Chinese buffet. I make him two sandwiches - one turkey and cheese, one ham and cheese.

Now, he likes those processed individually wrapped cheese slices just fine (I don't care for them), but they are cheaper than the "real" thing and he'll eat 'em, so I buy them.

If I had known I needed cheese slices on Monday before my WM run, I would have put that on my list and returned home with a pack. However, I did not know I was running out. Thankfully, I had enough to do two sandwiches on Tuesday. Then, I decided that after the Evil Twin got home from work yesterday, I would run to the K to the Rogers and get cheese and a few other items that they have marked down this week.

We don't live in a super ritzy part of town, but we also don't live in a slummy area, either (not that there's anything wrong with that). But, the clientele at our local Kroger is something to behold. It's always a madhouse there and many of the shoppers seem to be lacking even the most basic social skillz.

So, it's always interesting, to say the least.

When I do go, I try to zip through as quickly as humanly possible. So, I had my list and sliced cheese was at the top. I also needed to swing by the pharmacy to check if they had a prescription ready for the Evil Twin. The thing was I had called the prescription in the night before, but it was out of refills, so the pharmacy would have to contact our doctor's office and get the go ahead to refill it.

The prescription wasn't ready because they hadn't heard back from our physician yet, but my favorite pharmacy tech took my number and said she'd call when she heard from them.

I checked out with the self check out line and made a beeline for the parking lot.

Then I realized I had failed to pick up the sliced cheese. FUCK! Briefly, I considered unloading my purchases into the van, then running back in. But, on second thought, I figured that Sissy and I could run by today and grab the cheese and hopefully, the prescription too.

Luckily, today is Wednesday, which means TET eats at the Chinese place. I wasn't in a desperate need for the cheese.

Wouldn't you know that shortly after I returned home, the pharmacy tech called to say they had received permission from the docs office and would have his refill ready in a short while? I told her I would pick it up today, so not to put a rush on it.

I think when I get into the store, I'll make my way straight to the cheese department, THEN get to the pharmacy.

That nasty, processed cheese food will be MINE, dammit!!!

UPDATE: A Friend on MySpace sent me this comment:


  1. Your Kroger sounds about like my local Kroger.

    Fuckin' scary!

  2. OMG!! What if there is a cheese shortage and you get there and like all the cheese is gone? Or some little old lady just took the last package of cheese?

  3. Look at Ron, coming over here fomenting cheese mayhem!

    I was going to comment on the strange name change of the aforementioned cheese slices.

    Years ago: Cheese Slices (often the word "real" was thrown around in there too)

    Today: Cheese Food

    Okay. Is there another use for cheese that I'm not aware of? Could there be some conspiracy to use cheese as a weapon perhaps? Can you bathe with cheese? I've never tried.

    I'm going to go shower with some cheese. I'll let you know how it turns out.

  4. ETW - I shop a couple different Krogers and have witnesses similar things at both. The one closer to my home is smaller, but frequented by folks who think Cheetos qualify as a dairy product. The other has a fueling station and is frequented by folks who consider tofu as "the other white meat."

    Anyway -- My significant other will not consume cheese food knowingly. I purchase the individually wrapped real American cheese slices made by Kraft. Yes, it is a little costlier, but it's real cheese, not a 'cheese food product' made mostly of oil.

    We've cut back on sandwiches and generally take leftovers, because we've cut most of our bread consumption. I've purchased so many lunchbox sized plastics that it makes not sense any other way.

    I wish you clarity of mind during your travels. Now, go take the cheese.


  5. Bucky - the people aren't like the people I regularly encounter in the community, so I don't know *where* they're coming from! Scary is right.

    Ron - then I would have to hang myself!

    Stew - I added a pic that may help you figure this out.

    Muze - I know that the processed stuff is so icky. I buy the real cheese slices when we grill burgers, etc. That processed stuff just don't cut it!

  6. Hmmm.....guess that's why all the Krogers here went out of business....all the 'normal' people quit goin there ;)

  7. I don't even think the people at my Kroger's have shopping skillz, much less people skillz. But, every now and then, I do get treated to a mismatched couple with the dude wearing a full-on kilt and the wife wearing head-to-toe Muslim chic. I always wonder what up with that.

  8. This might help to remind you next time:

    Just say cheese!

  9. Thanks Hottie britches (lol) that did help.

    Now I just wanna know, Zis cheese, who cuts eet?

  10. Efen - and everyone makes fun of the WM shoppers. I think it's worse at Kroger!

    BB - I think I'd have to try to find a way to strike up a conversation there and find out more. :-)

    Carolyn - My list had CHEESE written big and first. (I didn't forget it this time!).

    Stew - with processed cheese food, I think the squares are just splated out like that. No cutting of cheese required. LOL.

    Tiff - My days are revolving around cheese. Wonder if that's a sign?

  11. I never get out of the store with everything I needed. Just today I went to W*almart for groceries and didn't remember to buy jam or jelly. That means an extra trip to Food Lion tomorrow, since mr. kenju would be miffed if his toast couldn't be jammed every morning....LOL

  12. Oh man, I can't imagine having one of those process cheese slices on a regular sandwich, ETWife. What is your husband thinking? I must admit I love them on grilled cheese sandwiches---but that's the only place for them. IMHO, that is.

  13. I used to devour those Borden slices and now I can't stomach them. It's hard to find really good cheese or bread, and when you do it costs a fortune.

  14. Have you tried the Cracker Barrel slices? They are very good (normal cheese flavor) and are sliced fairly thick.

  15. kenju - leave it to me to always forget something for the Evil Twin (never anything I need and could live without....).

    Dave - they are gross. He just doesn't have a preference, but I agree that they're perfect for grilled cheese sammiches.

    honeywine - I know! I was shocked at how much I paid for a block of cheese the other day.

    Lauren - I like those with crackers. :-)

  16. You added that comment later :) I read your post nice and early this morning hehe around the time you commented at mine! I don't have a dang Krogers so I don't know what all you crazies are talking about. And I'm not picky about my cheese either. I love any kind of cheese on everything. But only if it's melted. I will not eat cheese plain.

    See I thought I had nothing to say about cheese but apparently I did!