I didn't really check my email address where my comments are sent yesterday and I rarely ever check older posts for new comments unless I see them in my inbox on my email site. But, I did check it this morning when I woke up and found that someBOT had posted two lengthy and offensive comments on older posts.
I have deleted them and I'm not really taking it personally, as we all know the spammers have computers that comb for keywords, then leave nutty shit behind at all kinds of places. I'm not the only "victim" I'm sure.
However, now I feel a need to do something about it. I can reject anonymous comments - but I have close friends and a husband who doesn't have a blogger or Open ID account and I don't want to punish them for some spammers unfortunate target of bloggers. I could block the IP address, but we all know there are proxys to get around that and I could block IPs 'til the cows came home and somewhere, somehow, a spam bot would find a way to get around it.
I could enable word verification, but people hate that (me included) or I could moderate the comments by having them go to my inbox to be approved prior to posting. Somehow or another, I don't like any of my choices.
For now, I'm just going to sit tight and see how things go. If it continues, I'll be forced to deal with it. I apologize to any of my readers who might have run across it - it was crazy, crazy ranting.
Of course, the Evil Twin was less than supportive when I tried to discuss it with him this morning. Thanks for having my back, dude.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Sunday, March 30, 2008
File It Under WTF??
The Evil Twin likes to wander off from the den (what us Southerners call the "TV" or "Family Room") and leave the TV on, blaring to whatever channel he was last watching.
More often than not, it's the Fox News channel - which is fine. I can semi-listen in and gather some newsy tidbits. When they ran a spot on this story, my attention was immediately riveted away from chatting with a friend on IM.
The guy in this story is a family man - three children - and he couldn't think of a better way to satisfy his needs? What happened to his best girl, Jackie? Or Thumbelina and her four sisters?
The Evil Twin is also sending me disturbing links every now and again - the woman who spent two years in the bathroom and when her boyfriend finally called for help, she had to be removed from the premises with the toilet seat stuck to her body that needed surgical removing, or how about this link? We're still trying to figure out if that is for real or a joke.
After reading the first story, I was relieved to find out the picnic table in question wasn't made of wood. As I said to my friend on IM, "That sure would give new meaning to the term: having wood." LOL.
More often than not, it's the Fox News channel - which is fine. I can semi-listen in and gather some newsy tidbits. When they ran a spot on this story, my attention was immediately riveted away from chatting with a friend on IM.
The guy in this story is a family man - three children - and he couldn't think of a better way to satisfy his needs? What happened to his best girl, Jackie? Or Thumbelina and her four sisters?
The Evil Twin is also sending me disturbing links every now and again - the woman who spent two years in the bathroom and when her boyfriend finally called for help, she had to be removed from the premises with the toilet seat stuck to her body that needed surgical removing, or how about this link? We're still trying to figure out if that is for real or a joke.
After reading the first story, I was relieved to find out the picnic table in question wasn't made of wood. As I said to my friend on IM, "That sure would give new meaning to the term: having wood." LOL.
Friday, March 28, 2008
Coming Soon: New Pictures
That's right. I decided that enough was enough on our slow shutter speed point and shoot digital camera. It's a nice camera and has served us well over the years, but it is becoming a bit (well, okay a lot) out of date.
I
n doing some research, I found this baby:
n doing some research, I found this baby:Then, I had to add a lens. A few mouse clicks later and voila! I fo
und this:
und this:I also got a SanDisk Extreme III 2 GB CompactFlash card to just round it all out. In speaking with one of the photography guys at The Evil Twin's office, he told me I had chosen wisely and that I wouldn't be disappointed with this camera. One of the photography guys uses his Rebel XT in the professional setting and turns out gorgeous photos.
Of course, I know a camera is only as good as the individual behind it, but I think this will be great for candid shots of the kids, vacation snaps, etc. My photography insider says the items I purchased will be as much as and MORE than I could ever need in this type of camera.
The camera takes 3 frames per second. Maybe I can even get a decent shot of Sissy with this one. So far, most pictures we have of her are simply "blurs" - she moves before the shutter clicks on our old camera.
I think we'll end up giving the Sony CyberShot to Buddy to play around with. We have the memory cards and USB connector, etc. He has his own computer running Windows XP, which was the Evil Twin's computer up until last summer when we upgraded for him.
I'm such a geek. I hope I can learn more about photography and maybe even get a little better at it.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Miscellany
Today will be a hodge podge of thoughts and ideas I've had pinging around in my head for a bit. Also, I've got pictures today - you know, kind of like "Show and Tell"! Aren't you lucky?
All Click had wondered a while back what constituted "really cute sandals". Well, in the brain of a female, it's a complicated mathmatical equation. It's something like : the desired cuteness multiplied by correct heel height divided by how expensive they are (more is better) minus the percentage of the sale price. It's all about the perceived (not real) bargain we stand to walk away with (so to speak).
Without further ado, I give you my new cute sandals: 
And, if you'll take notice - I think I have really cute toes too. The 2nd toe is NOT longer than the first toe, as it is with most people. The Evil Twin says I obviously have a birth defect, but I don't think so. He's just jealous.
The next pic shows a side view of the sandals. Notice what I mentioned earlier about heel height. When you're a tall girl like myself, you want to be sure you don't tower over your man of choice. The Evil Twin has about 5 inches +/- on me, so we're good.
The next photo shows our growing caterpillars. They are MUCH larger than this photo, which I only took a couple of days ago. I think they're almost ready to form chrysalids. After that happens, we have a 7 to 10 day wait until they emerge as butterflies! I'm soooo excited!
I'm sorry about the crappy layout here. I still haven't really figured out how to add pics without causing mutiny on Blogger. Let's face it: I'm lucky to have functioning brain cells, period. That's what having kids will do to your brain. It becomes like jell-o. Sometimes, it vibrates around in my skull like I'm on one of those funky mattresses in hotels a long time ago. You know, put a quarter in the machine and the whole bed shimmies. I used to think those were "rides". I suppose they were, depending on how you look at it.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
More on Showers
And I don't mean the baby or bridal variety. I'm talking about the turn on the faucet and hose yo nasty self off type. The Evil Twin and I are both uber-picky about water pressure. When Wyld visited, he used our shower downtairs - even though the upstairs one is roomier - but he commented on the good water pressure.
I had to tell him about our almost fanatical desire for finding shower heads that delivered a decent burst of water. We changed the one downstairs shortly after moving in because the one that was installed was pathetic. The Evil Twin removes the regulators out of them and then installs, so it's a sure bet the water will be a solid stream.
I have very thick hair, which requires some serious pressure on it so I can get the shampoo and conditioner to rinse out. A girl has to have her priorities, ya know?
We also enjoy hot showers, so we've tinkered with the hot water tank to deliver that for us. Energy and water conservation be damned! We need GOOD showers!
We had a little shower situation recently and had to replace the shower massage thingy from our main bath tub. The Evil Twin brought one home and installed it.
After I got out of the shower later yesterday morning, I called the Evil Twin at work and said, "That shower head's got to go. It sucks." He agreed and while I was at WalMart, I bought a different one. (I plan to take the other one back - I have the receipt and packaging - and when asked why I'm returning it, I'll say, "It was the shittiest shower I've ever had in my lifetime.").
Of course, I'm lying - the shittiest shower I've ever encountered was at a bed & breakfast we stayed at near Cass Railroad once, but the store in question doesn't have to know that - and besides, I wasn't facing the wretched fact that I LIVED at the B&B and would have to deal with the "Dribbler" on a daily basis. It was just ONE morning of my life ruined by shitty water pressure.
Honestly, if I liked crappy water pressure, I may as well hire someone to stand behind me and spit on me. I'd save on water bills at least.
I had to tell him about our almost fanatical desire for finding shower heads that delivered a decent burst of water. We changed the one downstairs shortly after moving in because the one that was installed was pathetic. The Evil Twin removes the regulators out of them and then installs, so it's a sure bet the water will be a solid stream.
I have very thick hair, which requires some serious pressure on it so I can get the shampoo and conditioner to rinse out. A girl has to have her priorities, ya know?
We also enjoy hot showers, so we've tinkered with the hot water tank to deliver that for us. Energy and water conservation be damned! We need GOOD showers!
We had a little shower situation recently and had to replace the shower massage thingy from our main bath tub. The Evil Twin brought one home and installed it.
After I got out of the shower later yesterday morning, I called the Evil Twin at work and said, "That shower head's got to go. It sucks." He agreed and while I was at WalMart, I bought a different one. (I plan to take the other one back - I have the receipt and packaging - and when asked why I'm returning it, I'll say, "It was the shittiest shower I've ever had in my lifetime.").
Of course, I'm lying - the shittiest shower I've ever encountered was at a bed & breakfast we stayed at near Cass Railroad once, but the store in question doesn't have to know that - and besides, I wasn't facing the wretched fact that I LIVED at the B&B and would have to deal with the "Dribbler" on a daily basis. It was just ONE morning of my life ruined by shitty water pressure.
Honestly, if I liked crappy water pressure, I may as well hire someone to stand behind me and spit on me. I'd save on water bills at least.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Pillow Poaching
When things get worn out or simply fall apart from wear and tear around here, I repace the item as soon as possible. If it's a pair of somethings, I replace both of them at the same time - regardless of whether just one or both are in need of replacing. I like things to be "the same". You know the song and dance around here - my OCD.
I'm particularly bad about pillows in the house. Plus, I have allergies that prevent me from getting too close to most bedding materials, so every single bedding item in the house (including those on other beds in the house) are all of the hypo-allergenic nature. Just in case I might need to sleep on/with them.
So, when the Evil Twin and I needed new pillows a while back, I bought two identical pillows. Same firmness, same brand, same store, same price. They feel exactly the same. I know which one is mine and which is his - I place them in different areas of the room while changing the sheets so they don't get mixed up.
Here's the hilarious part of all this: I hate my pillow. Typically, I end up tossing it on the floor beside the bed because I prefer to sleep with my head flat on the bed.
Now, I am a bad bed mate anyway - when my parents' moved me out of my crib, around age 2, they put me in a full size bed. All by my little self. I got used to taking up the whole mattress and space and so, I still enjoy sleeping right smack in the middle of a large bed. The Evil Twin and I have always had a Queen size, which is fine for us.
Then, we have the fact that the Evil Twin is a man of sizable proportions - thusly, he is always warm and cozy at night. We've been having some really cold evenings here and I like to be snuggly, so I migrate to his side of the bed AND his pillow. I really try to not poach his pillow while he's still using it, but I can't make any promises on that.
When he gets up in the morning, I sleep an extra half hour before I have to get up with Buddy for school stuff. During that time, I scuttle over to his side of the bed and put my head on his pillow (mine is still on the floor, remember?). It always puzzles him as to why I would do this.
Who wouldn't move to the warmest spot on the mattress? A crazy person, that's who! Plus, his side and his pillow smell like him. I've always been in love with the Evil Twin, but most especially, the way he smells. I love his armpits. TMI: yes, I do smell them. I think there's a lot to be said about liking another person's general smell. I once went out with a guy (Buzzardbilly - you'll know this one) who not only had BO, but he had a freaking egg shaped cyst or boil or something on his back. It looked like someone put half a hard boiled egg (the side view) on his back and the skin grew over it. Needless to say, that situation didn't last long.
Guys - if you have anything "extra" growing anywhere, please take care of it and also, don't forget the deoderant or cologne or hey? What about soap and water???
I'm particularly bad about pillows in the house. Plus, I have allergies that prevent me from getting too close to most bedding materials, so every single bedding item in the house (including those on other beds in the house) are all of the hypo-allergenic nature. Just in case I might need to sleep on/with them.
So, when the Evil Twin and I needed new pillows a while back, I bought two identical pillows. Same firmness, same brand, same store, same price. They feel exactly the same. I know which one is mine and which is his - I place them in different areas of the room while changing the sheets so they don't get mixed up.
Here's the hilarious part of all this: I hate my pillow. Typically, I end up tossing it on the floor beside the bed because I prefer to sleep with my head flat on the bed.
Now, I am a bad bed mate anyway - when my parents' moved me out of my crib, around age 2, they put me in a full size bed. All by my little self. I got used to taking up the whole mattress and space and so, I still enjoy sleeping right smack in the middle of a large bed. The Evil Twin and I have always had a Queen size, which is fine for us.
Then, we have the fact that the Evil Twin is a man of sizable proportions - thusly, he is always warm and cozy at night. We've been having some really cold evenings here and I like to be snuggly, so I migrate to his side of the bed AND his pillow. I really try to not poach his pillow while he's still using it, but I can't make any promises on that.
When he gets up in the morning, I sleep an extra half hour before I have to get up with Buddy for school stuff. During that time, I scuttle over to his side of the bed and put my head on his pillow (mine is still on the floor, remember?). It always puzzles him as to why I would do this.
Who wouldn't move to the warmest spot on the mattress? A crazy person, that's who! Plus, his side and his pillow smell like him. I've always been in love with the Evil Twin, but most especially, the way he smells. I love his armpits. TMI: yes, I do smell them. I think there's a lot to be said about liking another person's general smell. I once went out with a guy (Buzzardbilly - you'll know this one) who not only had BO, but he had a freaking egg shaped cyst or boil or something on his back. It looked like someone put half a hard boiled egg (the side view) on his back and the skin grew over it. Needless to say, that situation didn't last long.
Guys - if you have anything "extra" growing anywhere, please take care of it and also, don't forget the deoderant or cologne or hey? What about soap and water???
Monday, March 24, 2008
Buena Suerte
That means Good Luck in Spanish. That's how I feel about getting my blog finished on most days. I also cuss in Spanish in my head. Any more these days, I find myself feeling (and thinking), "F**k it." I mean, who really cares if I get this mess out anyway? I guess me, in my obsessive compulsive sick little brain.
It doesn't help my mood any that this is Easter Break week for Buddy - a whole week of enjoying our time off and I actually got to sleep in a half hour later than normal. I still had to get up and pack the Evil Twin's lunch, but I woke up on my own around 7:15 ish. I find that happening more and more these days (waking up on my own as opposed to the alarm or the Evil Twin reminding me that it's time to get up). Okay, so it's spring break and the temps are registering more "winter" than "spring" here.
It also doesn't help that Sissy is about to ride my last nerve straight to hell - with spurs on. I need to get to WalMart today and Buddy is still in bed - at nearly 10 AM. I haven't had a shower yet and it's only 31 degrees outside.
The Evil Twin got a taste of "Shopping with Sissy" on Saturday. He couldn't believe how much she whines. I've learned to tune it out, as most moms do (or risk losing their sanity along with their brain cells), but it's not easy for the Dads who aren't used to the grating "bamboo under fingernails" whine of a 2 year old.
Please, if you're the praying type or just sending good vibes type: send them our way that potty training happens sooner than later and Sissy can be shuttled off to preschool for at least 4 hours a week. That's a tall order, too, people. She acts like she'd rather eat a vegetable than sit on the potty chair.
Seriously, she hates veggies. I blame myself. While pregnant with Buddy, I ate loads of salads. That's what I craved more than anything. Salads and pickled items (pickles, pickled okra, etc). With Sissy, I ate a lot of deep fried cheesecake from Mayberry's. A whole order .... by myself. Well, no one wanted to split it with me and I wasn't going to let it go to waste! I also snuck miniature Snickers bars on a daily basis. I still only gained 13 pounds in 39 weeks, but she came out like a fly. She loves the sugar.
Buddy needs braces and Sissy will probably need a boatload of dental work, too - for cavities. And, she'll probably also need braces. My parents' paid a small fortune for my mouth. Turn about is fair play, I suppose.
I'm gonna go lurk on the Walt Disney website and make myself feel better. Hope you all have a great Monday - including you lurkers from Parkersburg and Kentucky (oh wait, that's probably downfall from KY - he's "too busy" to leave a comment).
It doesn't help my mood any that this is Easter Break week for Buddy - a whole week of enjoying our time off and I actually got to sleep in a half hour later than normal. I still had to get up and pack the Evil Twin's lunch, but I woke up on my own around 7:15 ish. I find that happening more and more these days (waking up on my own as opposed to the alarm or the Evil Twin reminding me that it's time to get up). Okay, so it's spring break and the temps are registering more "winter" than "spring" here.
It also doesn't help that Sissy is about to ride my last nerve straight to hell - with spurs on. I need to get to WalMart today and Buddy is still in bed - at nearly 10 AM. I haven't had a shower yet and it's only 31 degrees outside.
The Evil Twin got a taste of "Shopping with Sissy" on Saturday. He couldn't believe how much she whines. I've learned to tune it out, as most moms do (or risk losing their sanity along with their brain cells), but it's not easy for the Dads who aren't used to the grating "bamboo under fingernails" whine of a 2 year old.
Please, if you're the praying type or just sending good vibes type: send them our way that potty training happens sooner than later and Sissy can be shuttled off to preschool for at least 4 hours a week. That's a tall order, too, people. She acts like she'd rather eat a vegetable than sit on the potty chair.
Seriously, she hates veggies. I blame myself. While pregnant with Buddy, I ate loads of salads. That's what I craved more than anything. Salads and pickled items (pickles, pickled okra, etc). With Sissy, I ate a lot of deep fried cheesecake from Mayberry's. A whole order .... by myself. Well, no one wanted to split it with me and I wasn't going to let it go to waste! I also snuck miniature Snickers bars on a daily basis. I still only gained 13 pounds in 39 weeks, but she came out like a fly. She loves the sugar.
Buddy needs braces and Sissy will probably need a boatload of dental work, too - for cavities. And, she'll probably also need braces. My parents' paid a small fortune for my mouth. Turn about is fair play, I suppose.
I'm gonna go lurk on the Walt Disney website and make myself feel better. Hope you all have a great Monday - including you lurkers from Parkersburg and Kentucky (oh wait, that's probably downfall from KY - he's "too busy" to leave a comment).
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Grrrr!
I'm so frustrated today and I don't know why. I hate those people who manufacture teeny little Easter chocolates. They're tiny, so I grab several. Of course, tomorrow morning on the scales will make me more depressed. I've got less than a month to lose 6 pounds or more. My goal is 120.
I weighed 108 when I got married at the age of 25. I've weighed between 115 and 120 after the births of both my children. I'll be 40 on April 22 and I really just want to be back to my regular weight.
On the good news front (I guess), I stopped taking my Paxil and Ativan a month ago. I finally threw out the remaining Paxil. I hated that shit. I'm hanging on to the few Ativans I have left - just in case.
I made up my mind that I'm just not living like that anymore.
The Evil Twin and I plan on watching an episode of Dexter or two. He's behind where I left off, so we'll go back and I'll watch a few re-runs - which, in the world of Dexter, is no problemo. He could park his shoes under my bed any old time.
I am also starting to feel somewhat better about myself - Rock of Love with Bret Michaels is on TV and that whole thing is above and beyond pathetic. What a bunch. There's more silicone there than a plastic surgeon's office. OMGosh... there's some skank making out with Bret right now and I don't feel so well. I don't care how much money he has, he probably has mouth herpes too and if he doesn't - he's trying real hard to get it because I've seen him tongue every girl on this show in just about 7 minutes of viewing displeasure. Gross! I know, I know... turn it off, right? It's like a train wreck.
He's an effing tit talker too! He only talks to the girls' tits! Bret - they're FAKE. No big deal! Or maybe he's trying to save himself from looking at their blue eye shadow. Hard telling.
Bleh...
I weighed 108 when I got married at the age of 25. I've weighed between 115 and 120 after the births of both my children. I'll be 40 on April 22 and I really just want to be back to my regular weight.
On the good news front (I guess), I stopped taking my Paxil and Ativan a month ago. I finally threw out the remaining Paxil. I hated that shit. I'm hanging on to the few Ativans I have left - just in case.
I made up my mind that I'm just not living like that anymore.
The Evil Twin and I plan on watching an episode of Dexter or two. He's behind where I left off, so we'll go back and I'll watch a few re-runs - which, in the world of Dexter, is no problemo. He could park his shoes under my bed any old time.
I am also starting to feel somewhat better about myself - Rock of Love with Bret Michaels is on TV and that whole thing is above and beyond pathetic. What a bunch. There's more silicone there than a plastic surgeon's office. OMGosh... there's some skank making out with Bret right now and I don't feel so well. I don't care how much money he has, he probably has mouth herpes too and if he doesn't - he's trying real hard to get it because I've seen him tongue every girl on this show in just about 7 minutes of viewing displeasure. Gross! I know, I know... turn it off, right? It's like a train wreck.
He's an effing tit talker too! He only talks to the girls' tits! Bret - they're FAKE. No big deal! Or maybe he's trying to save himself from looking at their blue eye shadow. Hard telling.
Bleh...
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Ready for the Day
Yawwwnnn! I'm up early and getting ready to get in the shower. The Evil Twin needs to take his car for an inspection sticker this AM, so he's in the shower and headed to our main guy here in a few to get that sticker.
Then, Buddy has a birthday party that is just past the Barboursville (Huntington) area. For those not from around here, that's about an hour west of us. So, we'll drop him off and get some shopping done while we wait the 2 hours for the party to run its' course. I bought the Evil Twin a new computer back in July and it runs Vista, which is apparently not compatible with our scanner. So, we'll head to Best Buy and find a scanner, then pop by Lowe's for assorted home owner needs.
With the Evil Twin's freelance work, he really needs to have a scanner on hand and it needs to be a top quality one, so a replacement is a priority. He doesn't believe in the "all-in-one" contraptions, so we have a laser printer, a color printer and a flat bed scanner at all times.
I'm ready for Easter morning too. The Easter Bunny will visit overnight and we've got eggs to dye. I also found the kids' a Butterfly Pavilion from insectlore.com. It's a kit that comes with a butterfly habitat (a mesh net thingy) and live caterpillars in containers. The caterpillars become chrysalids, which eventually become Painted Lady butterflies. You can observe them in their habitat for a while and then let them out in the wild, where they can live out their natural butterfly lives in peace.
I was so excited when it arrived yesterday and we spent the day looking at our ten new caterpillars. I think this is a really fun activity, plus it's a learning opportunity for the kids to see the life cycle of an insect. It wasn't very expensive, either and now is the time to order one - while the weather is warmer.
The Evil Twin designed the new brochure for Buddy's school and he got a super nice Thank You note in the mail with $50 worth of Applebee's gift card. Guess where we're having lunch today? :-) YUM.
I'll try to get pictures of my caterpillars, chrysalids and eventually butterflies to post here. I think I might be more excited than my young 'uns about it! LOL.
Then, Buddy has a birthday party that is just past the Barboursville (Huntington) area. For those not from around here, that's about an hour west of us. So, we'll drop him off and get some shopping done while we wait the 2 hours for the party to run its' course. I bought the Evil Twin a new computer back in July and it runs Vista, which is apparently not compatible with our scanner. So, we'll head to Best Buy and find a scanner, then pop by Lowe's for assorted home owner needs.
With the Evil Twin's freelance work, he really needs to have a scanner on hand and it needs to be a top quality one, so a replacement is a priority. He doesn't believe in the "all-in-one" contraptions, so we have a laser printer, a color printer and a flat bed scanner at all times.
I'm ready for Easter morning too. The Easter Bunny will visit overnight and we've got eggs to dye. I also found the kids' a Butterfly Pavilion from insectlore.com. It's a kit that comes with a butterfly habitat (a mesh net thingy) and live caterpillars in containers. The caterpillars become chrysalids, which eventually become Painted Lady butterflies. You can observe them in their habitat for a while and then let them out in the wild, where they can live out their natural butterfly lives in peace.
I was so excited when it arrived yesterday and we spent the day looking at our ten new caterpillars. I think this is a really fun activity, plus it's a learning opportunity for the kids to see the life cycle of an insect. It wasn't very expensive, either and now is the time to order one - while the weather is warmer.
The Evil Twin designed the new brochure for Buddy's school and he got a super nice Thank You note in the mail with $50 worth of Applebee's gift card. Guess where we're having lunch today? :-) YUM.
I'll try to get pictures of my caterpillars, chrysalids and eventually butterflies to post here. I think I might be more excited than my young 'uns about it! LOL.
Friday, March 21, 2008
FAQ with ETW
I had a few questions sprinkled within my more than a few comments yesterday (thanks, friends - every comment made me smile!) and I thought instead of answering them within the comments, I would answer them as part of my blog today.
It seems easier, plus I can ramble at length which is one of my strengths. Hey, if you can't dazzle them with content, confuse them with verbosity. IOW, you think I have something important to say, but in reality, I'm just a windbag. Buuuut, you're still reading aren't ya? So, let's get to business.
WyldTh1ng from Wyld's Q&A asked: Do you consider yourself a hillbilly?
A: No, not really. I'm an import to WV and even upon moving here, we lived in/near the city. I am 2nd generation hick, though. I've lived in four different states, so there's a definite "mix" of personality going on.
Rosemary from Rosemary's Attic asked: Do they still make garter belts?
A: I'm not sure about these days, but I did buy that one at a legit, upscale department store. If I remember correctly, it was Lazarus, which is now Macy's.
The picture is not really a "picture" at all. It's a video capture from a certain movie I was in many years ago (not porn, I promise). It was a video on body piercings and I received a piercing in it (above the belly button, below my neck - take your guesses). There were three segments involved and mine was the only one that had a semi-plot to it. The other two piercings were guys. One got a guiche - a guiche is a piercing of the "taint" or perineum and the other guy got his lip pierced.
I don't know about you all, but I'm guessing there wasn't really anyway to make the guiche more appealing than by just showing the dude's hairy crack. Nice guy and all, but just watching the video was closer than I wanted to be to his "exit door". KWIM?
The guy who got his lip pierced also had his nipple pierced, a guiche and a pair of dydoes (I really do not want to explain this one), which he later shows in the video. Those were all done way before the video was shot, so they were healed up and ready for viewing.
I believe I might be the only person who still owns a copy of this - and The Evil Twin transferred it from VHS to DVD for me. Funny enough, I can't watch my own segment.
Also, on a side note, I'm glad to find out I'm not the only CW out there in blogland. I suspected as much.
I know I'll blog again before Sunday (Help! I'm talking and I can't shut up!) but Happy Easter in advance. You know, in case you're just "too busy" to check in with me again before Monday.
It seems easier, plus I can ramble at length which is one of my strengths. Hey, if you can't dazzle them with content, confuse them with verbosity. IOW, you think I have something important to say, but in reality, I'm just a windbag. Buuuut, you're still reading aren't ya? So, let's get to business.
WyldTh1ng from Wyld's Q&A asked: Do you consider yourself a hillbilly?
A: No, not really. I'm an import to WV and even upon moving here, we lived in/near the city. I am 2nd generation hick, though. I've lived in four different states, so there's a definite "mix" of personality going on.
Rosemary from Rosemary's Attic asked: Do they still make garter belts?
A: I'm not sure about these days, but I did buy that one at a legit, upscale department store. If I remember correctly, it was Lazarus, which is now Macy's.
The picture is not really a "picture" at all. It's a video capture from a certain movie I was in many years ago (not porn, I promise). It was a video on body piercings and I received a piercing in it (above the belly button, below my neck - take your guesses). There were three segments involved and mine was the only one that had a semi-plot to it. The other two piercings were guys. One got a guiche - a guiche is a piercing of the "taint" or perineum and the other guy got his lip pierced.
I don't know about you all, but I'm guessing there wasn't really anyway to make the guiche more appealing than by just showing the dude's hairy crack. Nice guy and all, but just watching the video was closer than I wanted to be to his "exit door". KWIM?
The guy who got his lip pierced also had his nipple pierced, a guiche and a pair of dydoes (I really do not want to explain this one), which he later shows in the video. Those were all done way before the video was shot, so they were healed up and ready for viewing.
I believe I might be the only person who still owns a copy of this - and The Evil Twin transferred it from VHS to DVD for me. Funny enough, I can't watch my own segment.
Also, on a side note, I'm glad to find out I'm not the only CW out there in blogland. I suspected as much.
I know I'll blog again before Sunday (Help! I'm talking and I can't shut up!) but Happy Easter in advance. You know, in case you're just "too busy" to check in with me again before Monday.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
For A Friend
Things I Love/Things I Hate v. 1.0
This is for a friend of mine from college who is also on my MySpace. He has Wegener's Granulomatosis, which is a serious autoimmune disorder. He's an attorney in town and let me tell you, that takes a lot of time and energy. When you're stuck on dialysis and waiting for a kidney (at the age of 40), sometimes you have to count the small blessings in life. Oh sure, you could write a book on the "hates" (as he and I discussed), but it's nice to round those out with likes or loves just for balance.
Also, he is extremely intelligent and I like to read his stuff because guess what? He makes sense! My college roommate had gone to high school with him and his brother and it's hard to believe how much the four of us partied back in college and all turned out "normal" or in his and his bro's case, above average even. I've lost touch with my college roommate. Last I heard, she was in Redwood, CA. If you know Maria Zita, let her know I miss her.
He blogs on MySpace quite often. I used to - not as much these days. So, I'll take up his challenge to do my own list and then email it to him. Having an autoimmune disorder myself, I can see where he's coming from most of the time. I could "waller" in self-pity or I could be a shameless fool who laughs at myself - a lot. Typically, I pick option 2. Being a dork does have it's advantages.
I love: my kids. They keep me young... feeling, at least.
I hate: the fact that I don't get many breaks. Since my parents' both passed away, we don't trust anyone for child care, so I spend all waking moments with one or both of the rugrats.
I love sunshine and sandal weather.
I hate snow and cold. (Note to self: I probably shouldn't live in WV).
I love that my MS medicine seems to be working for me.
I hate giving myself an injection every day.
I love the moments in bed with the Evil Twin, just before we go to sleep. We'll talk about different things and usually end up laughing like loons about stupid stuff. Like last night, we both were laughing so hard we had tears rolling down our faces. The subject matter is classified.
I hate getting up in the morning - always. I might have had a good 8 hours of sleep or only 3 - I don't like getting out of my nice snuggly bed.
I love writting my silly little blog and getting to "know" so many great people over the internet.
I hate when I don't get very many comments. I'm a comment WHORE folks. Get with it!
I love weekends - I get to spend time with my whole family!
I hate weekdays - I get lonely sometimes and I have to get up too early. For those who think "Oh, she's a stay at home mom - sitting around watching TV, eating bonbons, and napping whenever possible." Wrong! I can't even get through writting here without a dozen or more interruptions.
That's all I can think of for now. It's injection time. Yesterday was particularly fun, as I had to stick myself 3 times just to find a spot that wasn't ruined and I could finish the job. So, I've been putting it off this morning. Here goes....
This is for a friend of mine from college who is also on my MySpace. He has Wegener's Granulomatosis, which is a serious autoimmune disorder. He's an attorney in town and let me tell you, that takes a lot of time and energy. When you're stuck on dialysis and waiting for a kidney (at the age of 40), sometimes you have to count the small blessings in life. Oh sure, you could write a book on the "hates" (as he and I discussed), but it's nice to round those out with likes or loves just for balance.
Also, he is extremely intelligent and I like to read his stuff because guess what? He makes sense! My college roommate had gone to high school with him and his brother and it's hard to believe how much the four of us partied back in college and all turned out "normal" or in his and his bro's case, above average even. I've lost touch with my college roommate. Last I heard, she was in Redwood, CA. If you know Maria Zita, let her know I miss her.
He blogs on MySpace quite often. I used to - not as much these days. So, I'll take up his challenge to do my own list and then email it to him. Having an autoimmune disorder myself, I can see where he's coming from most of the time. I could "waller" in self-pity or I could be a shameless fool who laughs at myself - a lot. Typically, I pick option 2. Being a dork does have it's advantages.
I love: my kids. They keep me young... feeling, at least.
I hate: the fact that I don't get many breaks. Since my parents' both passed away, we don't trust anyone for child care, so I spend all waking moments with one or both of the rugrats.
I love sunshine and sandal weather.
I hate snow and cold. (Note to self: I probably shouldn't live in WV).
I love that my MS medicine seems to be working for me.
I hate giving myself an injection every day.
I love the moments in bed with the Evil Twin, just before we go to sleep. We'll talk about different things and usually end up laughing like loons about stupid stuff. Like last night, we both were laughing so hard we had tears rolling down our faces. The subject matter is classified.
I hate getting up in the morning - always. I might have had a good 8 hours of sleep or only 3 - I don't like getting out of my nice snuggly bed.
I love writting my silly little blog and getting to "know" so many great people over the internet.
I hate when I don't get very many comments. I'm a comment WHORE folks. Get with it!
I love weekends - I get to spend time with my whole family!
I hate weekdays - I get lonely sometimes and I have to get up too early. For those who think "Oh, she's a stay at home mom - sitting around watching TV, eating bonbons, and napping whenever possible." Wrong! I can't even get through writting here without a dozen or more interruptions.
That's all I can think of for now. It's injection time. Yesterday was particularly fun, as I had to stick myself 3 times just to find a spot that wasn't ruined and I could finish the job. So, I've been putting it off this morning. Here goes....
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
No Money Down
I'm gonna add a video in the next post, because apparently, I'm not intelligent enough to embed a Youtube video within a blog post. What the hell am I doing wrong? If you can offer help, it'd be muchly appreciated.
Anyway, this video is really funny - to me, anyway. The guy who plays the part of the 2nd Abe Lincoln is a man I dated for about 2 years back when we were much younger. The story he tells is true. I know the other two people he mentions, too. In fact, Johnny Puke is on my MySpace friends list. Puke is from this same area and we've known each other for eons. Same with me and my ex.
We broke up, finally, for good at some point before I turned 22. It was off and on, etc. for a long while. But, we remain friends to this very day. I spoke to him last Friday on the phone.
He was with me when I got my third tattoo and helped it move in the direction that is my tat. It was a custom design at the Pittsburgh Tattoo Convention in 1991.
We were just kids back then and we went thru a lot together, which is why I think I'll always love him in a way - even if it's not romantic love or emotional love.
He and the Evil Twin were friends before I met either of them. After he graduated from graduate school with a Master's Degree in film making, he lived back "home" for a bit. We got lucky and hired him as the videographer for our wedding. He came to the party at our hotel room later - along with the majority of the guests who were not older relatives of ours. And shot more video. LOL.
We recently transferred both tapes to DVD.
I'm proud of him - he's come a long way in his film and photography career.
Anyway, this video is really funny - to me, anyway. The guy who plays the part of the 2nd Abe Lincoln is a man I dated for about 2 years back when we were much younger. The story he tells is true. I know the other two people he mentions, too. In fact, Johnny Puke is on my MySpace friends list. Puke is from this same area and we've known each other for eons. Same with me and my ex.
We broke up, finally, for good at some point before I turned 22. It was off and on, etc. for a long while. But, we remain friends to this very day. I spoke to him last Friday on the phone.
He was with me when I got my third tattoo and helped it move in the direction that is my tat. It was a custom design at the Pittsburgh Tattoo Convention in 1991.
We were just kids back then and we went thru a lot together, which is why I think I'll always love him in a way - even if it's not romantic love or emotional love.
He and the Evil Twin were friends before I met either of them. After he graduated from graduate school with a Master's Degree in film making, he lived back "home" for a bit. We got lucky and hired him as the videographer for our wedding. He came to the party at our hotel room later - along with the majority of the guests who were not older relatives of ours. And shot more video. LOL.
We recently transferred both tapes to DVD.
I'm proud of him - he's come a long way in his film and photography career.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Ink
I've got three tattoos. They're all grouped together on my left thigh and if I happen to find a pic, I'll add it later.
Since last May - Mother's Day to be exact - I've been asking the Evil Twin (a designer by profession) to design a new tattoo for me. I'm thinking something upper right arm, to balance things out.
Both my babies are Aquarians. One in January, which has a garnet birthstone and the baby in February, which has a amethyst birthstone. So, I was thinking something along the lines of the symbol for Aquarius and perhaps utilizing the colors of garnet (a deep brownish red) and amethyst (light purple), although I'm okay with only black work too. I currently have a rose, but my favorite flowers are daisies, so incorporating a daisy or my kids' initials in a design would appeal to me (just put ETW in their place, since I realize most folks don't know my babies' names).
I don't do flash. Flash is the artwork you find on the walls of the tattoo shop. And, I don't do popular symbols or themes. In other words, no Tweety Birds or Taz's, no "Mom" or half naked ladies.
I'd like something in a fairly good size. I think you sacrifice detail if you opt for tiny work. I don't care how many hours I'm in the chair or how painful it is. I need to get my third tattoo re-filled anyway, so I'm looking at that work as well.
The point of this drivel? I'm inviting my readers to design my fourth tattoo. If you feel so inclined, give it your best. NO Clip Art - original work, only. You'll be in competition with the Evil Twin if he scoots off his duff and trie
s to work up my dream design.
s to work up my dream design. I Learn Something New Every Day
Thanks to my blogging buddy, Renn, I learned yesterday that Tommy Lee Jones is, in fact, a Texan. No wonder he has that accent down! I thought he was Southern, but was too lazy to google more info. Now, I know.
That's the great thing about reading all the blogs I love. I learn so many new and interesting things every single day. It's like a really cool education without having to make it to class on time. And goodness knows, I was never very good at that.
It's also the reason why I hate to make doctor's appointments or get my hair cut. I actually have to let someone know WHEN I will show up. Being a stay at home mom means I don't have to be in a hurry or be anywhere at any time unless I damn well feel like it. Of course, real life gets in the way and makes me bend to the "rules".
We should go back to the days of house calls (including hair dressers). Y'all know I'm cheap, but I'd actually pay a few extra dineros for that service.
The Evil Twin woke up this morning with a sick feeling stomach... I felt that way yesterday but feel fine today, so I'm wondering if it's the mild version of the crud that's been going around. As long as I'm not vomiting or having any *other* gastronomical problems, I can take queasy for a bit.
So, I'm trying to decide if I want to go ahead with my previous plans of hitting WalMart today or put it off until tomorrow. If I go today, I can leave Sissy at home with Daddy. Plus, if I'm by myself, I can turn up the Hank III in my van in an annoying loud fashion and receive withering looks from other motorist. "Hmmph! Who does she think she is - some 20 year old co-ed? She looks a little long in the tooth for that!"
See? One can be both educated AND immature!
That's the great thing about reading all the blogs I love. I learn so many new and interesting things every single day. It's like a really cool education without having to make it to class on time. And goodness knows, I was never very good at that.
It's also the reason why I hate to make doctor's appointments or get my hair cut. I actually have to let someone know WHEN I will show up. Being a stay at home mom means I don't have to be in a hurry or be anywhere at any time unless I damn well feel like it. Of course, real life gets in the way and makes me bend to the "rules".
We should go back to the days of house calls (including hair dressers). Y'all know I'm cheap, but I'd actually pay a few extra dineros for that service.
The Evil Twin woke up this morning with a sick feeling stomach... I felt that way yesterday but feel fine today, so I'm wondering if it's the mild version of the crud that's been going around. As long as I'm not vomiting or having any *other* gastronomical problems, I can take queasy for a bit.
So, I'm trying to decide if I want to go ahead with my previous plans of hitting WalMart today or put it off until tomorrow. If I go today, I can leave Sissy at home with Daddy. Plus, if I'm by myself, I can turn up the Hank III in my van in an annoying loud fashion and receive withering looks from other motorist. "Hmmph! Who does she think she is - some 20 year old co-ed? She looks a little long in the tooth for that!"
See? One can be both educated AND immature!
Monday, March 17, 2008
ETW Movie Thoughts
Last night, the Evil Twin and I watched "No Country for Old Men". Excellent flick. We're Coen brothers fans anyway - although we might be the only fans of theirs who do not find anything about "The Big Lebowski" to be super entertaining - or even up to par with films like "Fargo" and "O, Brother Where Art Thou?" and "Raising Arizona".
Of course, the main tip off that "Hudsucker Proxy" may not have been their best work is boldly portrayed in the title. It just sucked. They might have wanted to re-think that title.
That being said, the Coen brothers don't suck very often - and they pulled out all the stops for "No Country for Old Men" - it's beautifully shot. The scenes that were meant as suspensful were agonizingly so. I jumped several times (and had to cover my peepers a few times too - but I utilize the "slightly open fingers" method so I have a little bit of vision, but can shut it off quickly, if needed.)
The story is set in a west Texas town and along the Mexico border, and I really enjoyed listening to the "Texans" speak. Many actors nailed the accents and the dialogue was true to that region. I'm a stickler for Southern accents. I hate movies where the actors move freely from a semi-passable Southern accent to no accent at all.
Tommy Lee Jones and the gal who played Lewellen's (sp?) wife both had excellent accents. It's fun to translate from time to time. Plus, I got a few opportunities to translate Spanish to English for my non-Spanish speaking husband.
Well, that's about as thoughtful and thorough as I can be on this one without giving it all away. Orignially, we thought the movie was about 3 hours long, so we got an early start. It ended after maybe a bit more than 2 hours - however, if there had been an extra hour - I would have watched that in rapt attention too. It was that good!
Of course, the main tip off that "Hudsucker Proxy" may not have been their best work is boldly portrayed in the title. It just sucked. They might have wanted to re-think that title.
That being said, the Coen brothers don't suck very often - and they pulled out all the stops for "No Country for Old Men" - it's beautifully shot. The scenes that were meant as suspensful were agonizingly so. I jumped several times (and had to cover my peepers a few times too - but I utilize the "slightly open fingers" method so I have a little bit of vision, but can shut it off quickly, if needed.)
The story is set in a west Texas town and along the Mexico border, and I really enjoyed listening to the "Texans" speak. Many actors nailed the accents and the dialogue was true to that region. I'm a stickler for Southern accents. I hate movies where the actors move freely from a semi-passable Southern accent to no accent at all.
Tommy Lee Jones and the gal who played Lewellen's (sp?) wife both had excellent accents. It's fun to translate from time to time. Plus, I got a few opportunities to translate Spanish to English for my non-Spanish speaking husband.
Well, that's about as thoughtful and thorough as I can be on this one without giving it all away. Orignially, we thought the movie was about 3 hours long, so we got an early start. It ended after maybe a bit more than 2 hours - however, if there had been an extra hour - I would have watched that in rapt attention too. It was that good!
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Snooping and Stalking
I mean, on my site meter doo-dad over there. I love to see what kind of searches lead the blind to my dusty little corner of the web. And, after last week's posts just LOADED with interesting terms, I expected to draw in the perverts like a moth to flame.
No, I get a lot of hits from folks just wondering where the Fiestaware outlet is located (Flatwoods, WV - thanks for stopping by).
One unsuspecting reader was just searching for info on Lowe's and door installation. Poor thing. They got this post that I wrote over a year ago.
Thanks for checking that out, whoever you were. It made me chuckle to read it again. Yes, I do crack myself up. And yes, it does suck to have such low standards. (on the cracking myself up thang).
I don't want to leave my faithful readers out in the cold with no funny - unlike yours truly who still snickers about farts and stuff - I'll share one of my new LOL Youtube vids. I hope this works.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0w0c0DOLrsw
No, I get a lot of hits from folks just wondering where the Fiestaware outlet is located (Flatwoods, WV - thanks for stopping by).
One unsuspecting reader was just searching for info on Lowe's and door installation. Poor thing. They got this post that I wrote over a year ago.
Thanks for checking that out, whoever you were. It made me chuckle to read it again. Yes, I do crack myself up. And yes, it does suck to have such low standards. (on the cracking myself up thang).
I don't want to leave my faithful readers out in the cold with no funny - unlike yours truly who still snickers about farts and stuff - I'll share one of my new LOL Youtube vids. I hope this works.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0w0c0DOLrsw
Friday, March 14, 2008
Finally - Getting to the 5 Things Meme
Rebecca from Carpe You Some Diem tagged me earlier this week with the "5 Things" meme. I'm supposed to list five things about myself and then tag five others.
1. The Evil Twin and I have been together for 16 years (married almost 15) and I still get butterflies in my stomach when I think about him. (Dexter, too, but mine and Dexter's relationship is only just new - LOL).
2. I love Summer because it allows me to wear the fewest clothes possible and still not get arrested.
3. Music makes me really happy but I'm not able to indulge in that much anymore because of my children. Most of the things I listen to are completely inappropriate for anyone under 18 to hear.
4. When it comes to decorating, I'm no Martha Stewart. In fact, I'm unbelievably masculine in my choices. However, I have always wanted a red front door. So far, both houses we've owned have had red doors (after I lean on the Evil Twin for months or years to paint it - I custom ordered two new doors last summer for this house and the exterior door was painted immediately).
5. I learned to swim before the age of 2. My dad would often go out of town on business and my mom and I would accompany him. At one hotel, we were enjoying the pool. When my dad dove in, I dove in after him and a strange man jumped in and grabbed me - screaming - out of the pool. My mom had been reading and when she looked up from her book, the guy said, "She looked too small and I thought she was just monkey see - monkey do after her dad." My mom said, "Throw her back in. She can swim."
Okay, there ya have it. I'm only half awake so it's a boring list. I don't like to work my brain cells too hard first thing in the morning.
I have such an amazing list of blogs I read everyday there on the right, it's hard to pick only five. I'm going to tag: Ron, Tiff, Renn, Carolyn, and Rosemary. That was harder than the list of five things. LOL.
Anyone else who reads and would like to participate, feel free to poach the idea. And let me know if you do... well, I'll be visiting anyway, so I'll see it eventually. Love, the Evil Twin's Wife (aka "The Stalker"). Happy Friday, lovlies!
1. The Evil Twin and I have been together for 16 years (married almost 15) and I still get butterflies in my stomach when I think about him. (Dexter, too, but mine and Dexter's relationship is only just new - LOL).
2. I love Summer because it allows me to wear the fewest clothes possible and still not get arrested.
3. Music makes me really happy but I'm not able to indulge in that much anymore because of my children. Most of the things I listen to are completely inappropriate for anyone under 18 to hear.
4. When it comes to decorating, I'm no Martha Stewart. In fact, I'm unbelievably masculine in my choices. However, I have always wanted a red front door. So far, both houses we've owned have had red doors (after I lean on the Evil Twin for months or years to paint it - I custom ordered two new doors last summer for this house and the exterior door was painted immediately).
5. I learned to swim before the age of 2. My dad would often go out of town on business and my mom and I would accompany him. At one hotel, we were enjoying the pool. When my dad dove in, I dove in after him and a strange man jumped in and grabbed me - screaming - out of the pool. My mom had been reading and when she looked up from her book, the guy said, "She looked too small and I thought she was just monkey see - monkey do after her dad." My mom said, "Throw her back in. She can swim."
Okay, there ya have it. I'm only half awake so it's a boring list. I don't like to work my brain cells too hard first thing in the morning.
I have such an amazing list of blogs I read everyday there on the right, it's hard to pick only five. I'm going to tag: Ron, Tiff, Renn, Carolyn, and Rosemary. That was harder than the list of five things. LOL.
Anyone else who reads and would like to participate, feel free to poach the idea. And let me know if you do... well, I'll be visiting anyway, so I'll see it eventually. Love, the Evil Twin's Wife (aka "The Stalker"). Happy Friday, lovlies!
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Furthering My Education
Warning: this post contains some seriously twisted information - things I wouldn't normally discuss on here, but having a sick sense of humor, I'll indulge some people.
Okay, Ron mentioned the Rusty Trombone yesterday in the comments and The Film Geek asked how I acquired my knowledge of the Dirty Sanchez. So I figured today was a good day to reveal that information.
I think both terms were mentioned in the movie "Strangers With Candy", and the show (which used to air on Comedy Central) was so irreverent, I wondered if the terms used were for actual acts or if they were mentioned because they just sound hilarious.
I Googled them. Oh, the links I found! My brain seared with my new-found knowledge. Not only did I find those two terms, but I found plenty others as well. What I find most shocking about this discovery was that (aside from the Rusty Trombone), I seriously wondered about the sanity of a dude who would attempt the Dirty Sanchez and what low self esteem bimbo would allow it to happen. Not I, said the Evil Twin's Wife. What's more, the acts have to be at least moderately commonplace if someone thought to attach a name to them, wouldn't you think?
I don't have many hang ups in life, but certain things are just off limits. And, as I stated yesterday, I've seen, heard and read more than my fair share of shocking depravities. When I first met the Evil Twin, he had a movie called "Butt Boys Have Lunch". Yep, coprophilia abounded in that one. Plus, one large, leather clad gay man "gave birth" to a Bert (of Ernie and Bert fame) doll out his ass. It wasn't a tiny plastic doll, either.
None of this is to say that this sort of behaviour is what the Evil Twin finds erotic, but in our social circle, the bearer of the most shocking toys was the winner.
Ok, so two years ago-ish, I'm reading these websites just chock full of interesting terms. My best friend (who is a gay man) stopped over around the holidays and being my age and all, I decided to run these terms past him to see if I was the only person in the dark about this. Well, he said he hadn't heard of the Dirty Sanchez or the Rusty Trombone, but when I went into detail about them and described the Rusty Trombone, he says, "Oh! I did that one once!" Oh, really? "But on the receiving end." That makes that thought in my head SO much better! Thanks!
Oh - and if you're still curious and you haven't hit Google yet, here's a link to the Wiki definition of the Rusty Trombone: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rusty_trombone
And another link, for those who really can't stand being out of the know: http://www.subgenius.com/updates/5-99news/X0027_the_dirty_sanchez_et.html
I didn't write anything involved in either of the two links provided. I'm just giving you value added service to your blog reading experience, should you desire it. NSFW. Not safe anywhere, I'm afraid. Read at your own risk. And preferably not around lunch or snack time. You've been warned.
Okay, Ron mentioned the Rusty Trombone yesterday in the comments and The Film Geek asked how I acquired my knowledge of the Dirty Sanchez. So I figured today was a good day to reveal that information.
I think both terms were mentioned in the movie "Strangers With Candy", and the show (which used to air on Comedy Central) was so irreverent, I wondered if the terms used were for actual acts or if they were mentioned because they just sound hilarious.
I Googled them. Oh, the links I found! My brain seared with my new-found knowledge. Not only did I find those two terms, but I found plenty others as well. What I find most shocking about this discovery was that (aside from the Rusty Trombone), I seriously wondered about the sanity of a dude who would attempt the Dirty Sanchez and what low self esteem bimbo would allow it to happen. Not I, said the Evil Twin's Wife. What's more, the acts have to be at least moderately commonplace if someone thought to attach a name to them, wouldn't you think?
I don't have many hang ups in life, but certain things are just off limits. And, as I stated yesterday, I've seen, heard and read more than my fair share of shocking depravities. When I first met the Evil Twin, he had a movie called "Butt Boys Have Lunch". Yep, coprophilia abounded in that one. Plus, one large, leather clad gay man "gave birth" to a Bert (of Ernie and Bert fame) doll out his ass. It wasn't a tiny plastic doll, either.
None of this is to say that this sort of behaviour is what the Evil Twin finds erotic, but in our social circle, the bearer of the most shocking toys was the winner.
Ok, so two years ago-ish, I'm reading these websites just chock full of interesting terms. My best friend (who is a gay man) stopped over around the holidays and being my age and all, I decided to run these terms past him to see if I was the only person in the dark about this. Well, he said he hadn't heard of the Dirty Sanchez or the Rusty Trombone, but when I went into detail about them and described the Rusty Trombone, he says, "Oh! I did that one once!" Oh, really? "But on the receiving end." That makes that thought in my head SO much better! Thanks!
Oh - and if you're still curious and you haven't hit Google yet, here's a link to the Wiki definition of the Rusty Trombone: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rusty_trombone
And another link, for those who really can't stand being out of the know: http://www.subgenius.com/updates/5-99news/X0027_the_dirty_sanchez_et.html
I didn't write anything involved in either of the two links provided. I'm just giving you value added service to your blog reading experience, should you desire it. NSFW. Not safe anywhere, I'm afraid. Read at your own risk. And preferably not around lunch or snack time. You've been warned.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Nasty
The homepage that pops up when I sign on to the internet is MSN.com. I read the headlines as I am quickly veering in a different direction (usually MySpace or my blog or other blogs I read). From time to time, something will catch my eye and being OCD curious, I'll think, "Oh, brother, I just got to check that article out, it sounds nuts." Or, whatever - but I'm compelled to read some of this junk.
Yesterday, I stumbled on this article: 4 Kissing Techniques You Must Master. Now, I am not a failure in the kissing department, but it's like I said, the headline alone made me think, "I wonder if I'm missing out on something." You know - I didn't even know what a Dirty Sanchez was until a couple of years ago and it's not like I just fell off the turnip truck when it comes to the bizarre and often unacceptable world of sexual perversions.
Did I just say that out loud? Ummm. sorry...
Anyway, back to this article. By the time I reached the end of it, I threw up in my mouth a little. Trust me, if I pulled any ONE of these four techniques on the Evil Twin, I would probably be staring down the barrel of divorce court, not any hot future action. And vice versa. I'd wonder what pod person had taken my husband and replaced him with some sap.
Thank goodness I haven't got a romantic bone in my body.
Is there anyone who thinks any of these actions is cute? Or romantic? Help me out here, would ya?
Yesterday, I stumbled on this article: 4 Kissing Techniques You Must Master. Now, I am not a failure in the kissing department, but it's like I said, the headline alone made me think, "I wonder if I'm missing out on something." You know - I didn't even know what a Dirty Sanchez was until a couple of years ago and it's not like I just fell off the turnip truck when it comes to the bizarre and often unacceptable world of sexual perversions.
Did I just say that out loud? Ummm. sorry...
Anyway, back to this article. By the time I reached the end of it, I threw up in my mouth a little. Trust me, if I pulled any ONE of these four techniques on the Evil Twin, I would probably be staring down the barrel of divorce court, not any hot future action. And vice versa. I'd wonder what pod person had taken my husband and replaced him with some sap.
Thank goodness I haven't got a romantic bone in my body.
Is there anyone who thinks any of these actions is cute? Or romantic? Help me out here, would ya?
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