Monday, March 15, 2010

Not Enough Ativan

Really, I don't think anyone could manufacture enough Ativan (an anti-anxiety med) to help me cope with my upcoming week.

Today, both kids have dentists appointments. Tomorrow morning, the Evil Twin goes to the dentist. We have no dental insurance. Can you say, "Ouch"?

We'll manage. We always do, somehow.

I don't hide the fact that I suffer from serious anxiety. I have for years. Currently, I'm on both Zoloft and Ativan to make me feel normal (most of the time), but I REALLY hate appointments. I hate having to be somewhere at a specific time. That's why I rarely get my hair cut, I just don't want to have to show up at X time. I like to mosey around and do my own thang.

Well, doctors, dentist and my BHE (bestest hairdresser ever) kinda frown on people who aren't on time. And it's not like I have a problem with being on time. I'm a very prompt person, but just the stress of having to be on time jacks up my anxiety, big time.

Before Buddy was born, I never felt like this. He had so many appointments in his first year, I almost became agoraphobic.

Thankfully, the meds do help. And, also, I try to make appointments as late in the day as possible so I have plenty of time to talk myself into it.

When it comes to grocery shopping or getting to the pool or things of that nature, I never get anxious. I can show up to do those things any old time.

I guess since I became a stay at home mom, I got used to having a flexible schedule - and even though I DO have a routine, the times I do things can vary in my day.

I need to get in the shower and get ready for my day. When I get back from spending a fortune on teeth, I have loads of housework waiting on me, too.

I really just need to hit the lotto, but I'd have better chances if I actually bought a ticket. LOL.

Also, on a side note, I continue to make bread, rolls, etc. for the family. I just don't eat any myself. I've been substituting salads instead of bread for me. That works. :-)


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  2. I get some anxiety from time to time, too. I hate it. When it hits me I can't sleep. And we don't have dental insurance either so I dread those appts, too.

  3. I have a dentist appt. on Friday that I already know I am going to be late for. It's only Monday and it has me sweating because I hate being late.

  4. Anxiety totally sucks and dentists are not that great a visit most times, but no insurance is that much worse. Ironically I have to hit the dentist tomorrow too.

  5. I'm a big ol' bundle of nerves. I hate it, but it's gotten to almost be part of who I am. Of course sometimes it's good to be easily excitable! LOL

  6. I hate appointments and stuff like that too. It's kind of like letting someone else be in control of my life.

  7. I have an OCD personality that things works much better for me whanI have routines... crazy off kilter schedules and stuff like that can give me anxiety too.

  8. I know how you feel with the anxiety thing! i am getting better with it.. i am on xanax (prescribed by my gyno.. go figure!) and it helps.. my biggest issue is i just cant stop thinking... of every possible outcome of every possible situation.. then i worry.. and stress.. and just feel crazy! lol. but its better than it used to be...

    ps. i hate going to the dentist.. i have to go in a month and i am dreading it... i almost passed out the last time i went.. before the dentits even came in to see me :-(

  9. Dentists generally make me beyond nervous even if they are nice,smell good, easy to look at and gentle. They use power tools in my mouth.

  10. I HATE dentist appointments for my kids! Even though they have insurance, there's always something they need that isn't covered. BAH! Thankfully, both of them have pretty straight teeth, though, so I'm sincerely hoping we don't have to do braces...

  11. One root canal cost me as much as having a c-section and styaing in the hosptial for 4 days...I have anxiety not beacuse of the appointment but because they cost so freaking much!

    Good luck today and tomorrow!

  12. I am a very anxious person. I have panic/ anxiety disorder. When I have to give a presentation or something in front of a crowd I truly feel like I'm going to have a heart attack. I haven't taken meds for it for years, but I am considering it. I also hate appointments!

  13. Your anxiety is the total opposite of mine. I cannot stand not having a plan. It is the not needing to be somewhere makes me anxious. Every day that I am not working I try to schedule lunch dates, make plans to be at an early movie, take my grandma out somewhere. Anything to be out of the house and doing something. I went from getting my nails done once every 3 week to once a week just to have something to do and somewhere to be.

  14. On a side note (and really none of my business but thought I would ask) does your husband's job offer any Health Savings Accounts? You can dump money in there pre-tax to pay for dentists, out of pocket medical, etc.

  15. We lost dental insurance when I got laid off. Our dentist tries to help. She puts off stuff that can wait (until we get insurance, if we ever do) Other wise, I think she gives us a break. Not like some that really jack up the price on private pays.

    I have depression and I had anxiety real bad once for a few months due to a situation that happened at work. I forget what meds I took. I guess they helped.
    I'm nervous about being on time. Having to get my wife moving really adds to it.
    Best wishes.

  16. I have dealt with anxiety over the past 2 years. It is not a lot of fun, at all and can be quite debilitating. I understand so much what you describe!

  17. Wow. That is a heavy load, for sure. We HAVE dental insurance, and I panic about scheduling appointments because I KNOW what needs to be done.

    I'm so sorry that appointments make you so anxious. Considering how sick Buddy was, though, well...It makes a lot of sense.

    May the appointments come and go smoothly, with minimal cost and concerns!

  18. I deal with my anxiety by getting sloshed and wishing ill on others. No bread, eh? Fantastic.

    Three wekks or so until this breadlessness ends. I have been eating sandwiches using lettuce leaves instead of bread and been eating tons of salad as well. Just ask my colon. Cheers ETW!!

  19. I get anxious about the weirdest things. But we all know that I am a freak!

  20. I was given Ativan to use it as needed to stop panic attacks.
    It helps panic attacks in 15 minutes fast however very next day, I suffer from rapid heart rate and visible pulse on neck! I switched to another benzoo, all my symptoms stopped, so it is Ativan! I would not reccomend this drug to anyone who suffers from Panic Disorder!