Last week, I begged, I mean asked for some suggestions for blog topics. I received a bounty of really good ideas and I'm working on those - not in order - but I WILL get around to all topics involved. Today, though, I want to touch on one by Rebecca from Carpe You Some Diem.
She suggested talking about "What is the one thing about you that nobody would guess? Like, you're secretly a champion pool player or something... something that not many people know about you."
So, that's where I'm going today.
However, some people - those who know me closest - may already know this about me.
A really close friend of mine - my senior prom date, in fact - visited last night. We've been friends since we were about 15 years old. I considered having him be my "Man of Honor" at my wedding, but back in 1993, that wasn't exactly a welcome trend.
My friend is a gay man, which is something I've known about him since we met.
What most people wouldn't guess about me, the conservative Republican, is that I have an enormous soft spot for gay people and even believe that they should be granted the same rights as other Americans. I know gay people can vote, but I'm talking about some of the other rights that they don't have and furthermore, what about just respect and understanding from the very people they work, live and play around?
I have both male and female gay friends, but mostly males.
I've spent years worrying about them, worried they may get sick (that's euphemistic language for AIDS in gay terms). I've lost two close friends to the disease.
Last night, my friend and I were drinking wine and he was drowning his tears... His boyfriend broke up with him a few days ago.
So he's all broken hearted and he tells me that his boyfriend disclosed that he is HIV positive prior to their relationship taking off. I have to give the guy credit - he was honest about it and gave my friend the opportunity to make an informed decision.
When my friend told me this, I gasped and said, "Oh, B, tell me you've been careful."
He shrugged.
Oh, SHIT!
He hasn't been tested recently.
Now, I know that HIV is not a guarantee that a person will have full blown AIDS and that many people can live fairly long lives despite being sick (look at Magic Johnson!), but I really don't want my friend to be sick.
It's been bothering me all night.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Monday, May 19, 2008
I Have a GIANT Muffin Top
At least, according to the Evil Twin, I do. Now, I don't profess to having the same body I did when I got married. I mean, that's obvious. Ask anyone who has known me a while and they'll tell you that I had mosquito bites for boobs back then too.
After two babies, and nursing said kiddos and gaining a little weight along the way (1993: 108lbs. 2008: 128lbs), well, things will just be different.
What the Evil Twin fails to realize is that because I wear low rise shorts and pants that often fall below my hips, what he's seeing are my hips that are larger, not so much a GIANT muffin top. Maybe a bit of extra flub around the middle.
And he gave me shit about posting the underpants blog.
Hmmmmm.
I've had a lot of fun finding ways to bring my GIANT muffin top into the conversation.
Thank goodness I'm not an uptight asshole, cause I could make his life hell over that remark. LOL.
All this talk of muffins is making me hungry. I need to go to the grocery today, so I think all I have for breakfast type stuff is cereal. Oh well. Cheerios will have to do.
If you have a moment (and I know you do, friends), please go to visit the Blonde Goddess and wish her a very Happy Birthday today!
Why is it that everyone around me ages so well and me and my GIANT muffin top are going to hell in a handbasket?? (that's a rhetorical question).
After two babies, and nursing said kiddos and gaining a little weight along the way (1993: 108lbs. 2008: 128lbs), well, things will just be different.
What the Evil Twin fails to realize is that because I wear low rise shorts and pants that often fall below my hips, what he's seeing are my hips that are larger, not so much a GIANT muffin top. Maybe a bit of extra flub around the middle.
And he gave me shit about posting the underpants blog.
Hmmmmm.
I've had a lot of fun finding ways to bring my GIANT muffin top into the conversation.
Thank goodness I'm not an uptight asshole, cause I could make his life hell over that remark. LOL.
All this talk of muffins is making me hungry. I need to go to the grocery today, so I think all I have for breakfast type stuff is cereal. Oh well. Cheerios will have to do.
If you have a moment (and I know you do, friends), please go to visit the Blonde Goddess and wish her a very Happy Birthday today!
Why is it that everyone around me ages so well and me and my GIANT muffin top are going to hell in a handbasket?? (that's a rhetorical question).
Sunday, May 18, 2008
I Crack Myself Up
As you can tell, I have a new pic. I'm displaying "the shocker" in this one. LOL. There were several shots taken. In most of them, I'm laughing really hard. The Evil Twin wasn't helping much.
He and his co-worker have started giving each other this hand signal at work. The Evil Twin refers to it as "the international sign of peace and love".
Also, this post is really just an excuse to post this picture. It's Sissy who just conked out cold on the couch last week. She must have been really tired. She's holding a book - that's what is in front of her face. She was like this for a fairly long time.
He and his co-worker have started giving each other this hand signal at work. The Evil Twin refers to it as "the international sign of peace and love".
Also, this post is really just an excuse to post this picture. It's Sissy who just conked out cold on the couch last week. She must have been really tired. She's holding a book - that's what is in front of her face. She was like this for a fairly long time.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Peace, Pot, Microdot
Ron came up with a good topic - my assessment of recreational drugs I’ve taken. I can do that. Keep in mind that it has been YEARS since I’ve done any of this stuff.
I started drinking at age 11. Yep. We would sneak stuff out of one kid’s dads liquor cabinet. It didn’t happen very often, but those were some fun times. We never really overdid it, either. We’d get a little buzz and laugh about stupid stuff.
By the time I was in junior high, around 7th grade, I was smoking pot. Like who wasn’t?? Getting our hands on weed was lots easier than buying booze, so my friends and I got high - a lot. I continued to smoke off and on up until about 5 or so years ago - however, I stopped smoking on a regular basis back in high school. I never really enjoyed the feeling that went along with being high. It made me paranoid and self conscious. I would smoke at parties every now and then. In college, my roommate was a small time dealer, so she always had it on hand.
These days, I still go to places/functions where people smoke. They know me as the one hold out who doesn’t though, so when the pipe or joint comes my way, they just pass it to the next person. I’m always too busy pickling my liver to indulge in other things.
You know what they say: smoking weed leads to harder drugs, sooooo:
LSD - ahhh, one of my favorites. The important thing is to have a good trip. I’ve never had a bad one. I’ve had ones that were more fun than others and that’s mostly thanks to the company I’m keeping at the time. Some people are just better to experience acid with than other people. I’ve taken blotter about a zillion times, but did microdot once. Both were fine, but blotter is easier to find.
Cocaine - another great one. I would do this until my nose bled often. I kept it contained to weekends or special occasions (parties, etc.). It was kind of difficult to run across here and it was also not cheap, so that kind of would make or break any weekend plans of being a coke-fiend.
Crystal meth - this is one I can’t believe I did more than once, but I did. I loved it. Now that I know what’s in that crap, I’m appalled that I even tried it to begin with. Again, this one was limited to weekends only. It was less expensive and more plentiful than coke, and really even a better time, so this was a popular one for a while.
X or ecstasy - super fun. Better than acid in that the trips aren’t nearly as long, but are just as intense. Sex is amazing and do-able (unlike meth, which will shrink a guy’s willy and no matter how great of attempt is made… that thing won’t be seeing an erection until the drug wears off).
Shrooms - or psilocybin mushrooms - they don’t taste very good at all, but the hallucinations are worth it. Again, these aren’t super plentiful, so they didn’t come around often. I did this mostly in college and a couple times afterward.
Heroin - only once. I snorted it. I was sick as a dog ALL night. I said, “Never again.” and that’s been true.
Pills (uppers, downers, speed, etc) - these are just okay. Not my fave and I wouldn’t take anything unless I knew what it was. This was something I rarely did because the payoff seemed shitty. Like the work involved in the procurement, etc. was too great for the thrill later. Also, some of that stuff just made my scalp crawl.
I think that’s it. Not too many, huh? I was practically an ANGEL!
Kids, don’t do drugs.
Additionally - I've never done anything, even have a sip of alcohol, while pregnant and I waited until Buddy spent the night at my parents' house to do anything major. Never when he was home. It's okay to have fun every once in a while, but not in a setting that might endanger my children.
* The title comes from a little utility building in Nitro, WV. It’s had this phrase, along with a pot leaf, spray painted on the side since sometime before 1983. I don’t know why it hasn’t been sandblasted off.
I started drinking at age 11. Yep. We would sneak stuff out of one kid’s dads liquor cabinet. It didn’t happen very often, but those were some fun times. We never really overdid it, either. We’d get a little buzz and laugh about stupid stuff.
By the time I was in junior high, around 7th grade, I was smoking pot. Like who wasn’t?? Getting our hands on weed was lots easier than buying booze, so my friends and I got high - a lot. I continued to smoke off and on up until about 5 or so years ago - however, I stopped smoking on a regular basis back in high school. I never really enjoyed the feeling that went along with being high. It made me paranoid and self conscious. I would smoke at parties every now and then. In college, my roommate was a small time dealer, so she always had it on hand.
These days, I still go to places/functions where people smoke. They know me as the one hold out who doesn’t though, so when the pipe or joint comes my way, they just pass it to the next person. I’m always too busy pickling my liver to indulge in other things.
You know what they say: smoking weed leads to harder drugs, sooooo:
LSD - ahhh, one of my favorites. The important thing is to have a good trip. I’ve never had a bad one. I’ve had ones that were more fun than others and that’s mostly thanks to the company I’m keeping at the time. Some people are just better to experience acid with than other people. I’ve taken blotter about a zillion times, but did microdot once. Both were fine, but blotter is easier to find.
Cocaine - another great one. I would do this until my nose bled often. I kept it contained to weekends or special occasions (parties, etc.). It was kind of difficult to run across here and it was also not cheap, so that kind of would make or break any weekend plans of being a coke-fiend.
Crystal meth - this is one I can’t believe I did more than once, but I did. I loved it. Now that I know what’s in that crap, I’m appalled that I even tried it to begin with. Again, this one was limited to weekends only. It was less expensive and more plentiful than coke, and really even a better time, so this was a popular one for a while.
X or ecstasy - super fun. Better than acid in that the trips aren’t nearly as long, but are just as intense. Sex is amazing and do-able (unlike meth, which will shrink a guy’s willy and no matter how great of attempt is made… that thing won’t be seeing an erection until the drug wears off).
Shrooms - or psilocybin mushrooms - they don’t taste very good at all, but the hallucinations are worth it. Again, these aren’t super plentiful, so they didn’t come around often. I did this mostly in college and a couple times afterward.
Heroin - only once. I snorted it. I was sick as a dog ALL night. I said, “Never again.” and that’s been true.
Pills (uppers, downers, speed, etc) - these are just okay. Not my fave and I wouldn’t take anything unless I knew what it was. This was something I rarely did because the payoff seemed shitty. Like the work involved in the procurement, etc. was too great for the thrill later. Also, some of that stuff just made my scalp crawl.
I think that’s it. Not too many, huh? I was practically an ANGEL!
Kids, don’t do drugs.
Additionally - I've never done anything, even have a sip of alcohol, while pregnant and I waited until Buddy spent the night at my parents' house to do anything major. Never when he was home. It's okay to have fun every once in a while, but not in a setting that might endanger my children.
* The title comes from a little utility building in Nitro, WV. It’s had this phrase, along with a pot leaf, spray painted on the side since sometime before 1983. I don’t know why it hasn’t been sandblasted off.
Topix?
I'm fresh out of ideas, folks. So, if anyone has a specific topic they'd enjoy to hear me expound on, feel free to use the comments. If I get more than one suggestion, then I'll get to them in order in coming days.
Don't ask for too much, okay? Nothing particularly difficult or outside my knowledge base (i.e. I have a degree in Journalism and I'm a mom, so no physics or math type things LOL). Also keep in mind that my two brain cells have to work overtime just to come up with the daily drivel here, mmmkay? Thanx.
____________________________________________________
I'm still reading my Smutty McSmutterson book. And, I read a passage last night that was far more disturbing and outlandish than the Captain Wood part.
I'm the type of person who will never walk away from a book I've started - no matter how dumb, or impossible, or confusing or whatever it turns out to be. I feel it's a personal failure to NOT finish that book. I mean, what kind of lazy mofo can't make themselves read another (in my case right now) 200 pages? Not me, that's who.
But, on the other hand, I have a good memory and the likelihood of me picking up another book by this author are slim to none. However, this book was a freebie - so I can make the allowance to finish it and be done with it. I can even pass it on when my task is complete. Anyone want to read smut?
_________________________________________________
I also was tagged by Wyld for a meme that's a creative writing project. That one will take me a day or two. I've got it saved for my attention in a bit.
Creative writing (fiction) has never been my strong suit, namely because I am trained as a Journalist (impartial, unbiased and objective - or at least, SHOULD be, even though the media today doesn't resemble any education I received).
Actually, my strongest skill in Journalism was/is copy (ad) writing, which if you're a smart consumer, you recognize as glorified fiction, right? So, maybe I CAN do this tag. I will try.
Don't ask for too much, okay? Nothing particularly difficult or outside my knowledge base (i.e. I have a degree in Journalism and I'm a mom, so no physics or math type things LOL). Also keep in mind that my two brain cells have to work overtime just to come up with the daily drivel here, mmmkay? Thanx.
____________________________________________________
I'm still reading my Smutty McSmutterson book. And, I read a passage last night that was far more disturbing and outlandish than the Captain Wood part.
I'm the type of person who will never walk away from a book I've started - no matter how dumb, or impossible, or confusing or whatever it turns out to be. I feel it's a personal failure to NOT finish that book. I mean, what kind of lazy mofo can't make themselves read another (in my case right now) 200 pages? Not me, that's who.
But, on the other hand, I have a good memory and the likelihood of me picking up another book by this author are slim to none. However, this book was a freebie - so I can make the allowance to finish it and be done with it. I can even pass it on when my task is complete. Anyone want to read smut?
_________________________________________________
I also was tagged by Wyld for a meme that's a creative writing project. That one will take me a day or two. I've got it saved for my attention in a bit.
Creative writing (fiction) has never been my strong suit, namely because I am trained as a Journalist (impartial, unbiased and objective - or at least, SHOULD be, even though the media today doesn't resemble any education I received).
Actually, my strongest skill in Journalism was/is copy (ad) writing, which if you're a smart consumer, you recognize as glorified fiction, right? So, maybe I CAN do this tag. I will try.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Big Baby Clown Britches
I had to make a trip out to my favorite haunt, the old WalMart yesterday. Oh, joy!
The Evil Twin called me and asked if I was going and I told him that was my plan. He wanted me to pick up another pack of undies for him.
Now, some of you know the Evil Twin. He is not a small guy. In fact, I often call him “My Big Beefy Burrito.” I’m a tall girl, so I’ve always picked the taller, bigger guys. If they outweigh me by 100 or more pounds, I’m cool with that.
The Evil Twin was only about 180 pounds when we met. He’s currently somewhere north of 200. And I mean, real north.
But, ya know what? He quit smoking almost 4 years ago and he packed on a few pounds then and any other weight he’s collected along the way, I just attribute to the fact that I’m a good cook. (Hey, don’t laugh - I’ve acquired some mad cooking skillz over the years).
So, anyway, he told me what size undies to fetch and when I got to the store, all I could find were briefs in a size he specified (let’s say 10 to 12) and the lower number was what he was looking for OR I could go for the next lowest size, the 6 to 8s. I didn’t want to get ones that would be too small for his big business, so I got the range that stated the number he had requested, plus the larger number.
When he got home, I opened the pack to put them in the laundry to be washed.
These underpants look like the big, bulky cloth diapers babies used to wear back before disposables were all the rage OR they look like something from the fricking circus. Like joke underpants.
They are ridiculous big. We were laughing - the Evil Twin said you could pin them to a wall and show a movie on them, like a back drop.
They are 100% cotton, so we’re hoping for some moderate, if not considerable, shrinkage. Otherwise, he’s gonna be wearing really baggy briefs for a while.
<--- Actual photo documentation of Ridiculously Large Underpants. LOL!!!!
The Evil Twin called me and asked if I was going and I told him that was my plan. He wanted me to pick up another pack of undies for him.
Now, some of you know the Evil Twin. He is not a small guy. In fact, I often call him “My Big Beefy Burrito.” I’m a tall girl, so I’ve always picked the taller, bigger guys. If they outweigh me by 100 or more pounds, I’m cool with that.
The Evil Twin was only about 180 pounds when we met. He’s currently somewhere north of 200. And I mean, real north.
But, ya know what? He quit smoking almost 4 years ago and he packed on a few pounds then and any other weight he’s collected along the way, I just attribute to the fact that I’m a good cook. (Hey, don’t laugh - I’ve acquired some mad cooking skillz over the years).
So, anyway, he told me what size undies to fetch and when I got to the store, all I could find were briefs in a size he specified (let’s say 10 to 12) and the lower number was what he was looking for OR I could go for the next lowest size, the 6 to 8s. I didn’t want to get ones that would be too small for his big business, so I got the range that stated the number he had requested, plus the larger number.
When he got home, I opened the pack to put them in the laundry to be washed.
These underpants look like the big, bulky cloth diapers babies used to wear back before disposables were all the rage OR they look like something from the fricking circus. Like joke underpants.
They are ridiculous big. We were laughing - the Evil Twin said you could pin them to a wall and show a movie on them, like a back drop.
They are 100% cotton, so we’re hoping for some moderate, if not considerable, shrinkage. Otherwise, he’s gonna be wearing really baggy briefs for a while.
<--- Actual photo documentation of Ridiculously Large Underpants. LOL!!!!
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Tired
I spent my evening watching American Idol (of course, because I'm a dork who is addicted to that stupid show). Then, the Evil Twin came back upstairs and wanted to record a movie off the DVR. I wasn't much interested in it and there was nothing going on with the computer.
I decided to get in bed and read. The book I'm currently reading is smut given to me by a friend. It's not a Harlequin Romance type book. It's smuttier, but with a better plot. Not exactly high-brow reading, but it'll do.
I read for about an hour and a half, then decided I should try to get some sleep. Of course, my brain is working overtime thinking about this book and a certain series of events that happened.
The basic gist of it is: A guy and girl are in love with each other, but were separated early on by a sequence of strange twists. 15 years later, they're in the same town again and she's being stalked by some maniac. He works security so he goes to her parents' house to check on the security and place some bugs. They end up having wild monkey sex for the first (and second and third) time all over her room.
Of course, he's packing some serious heat - I mean, would any guy in these novels have small or even average weiners? No, they're always ginormous. Fine, fine. I can let that go. Because at least that is realistic.
Here's what bothered me and I'll try to put this as delicately as I can. They have sex three different times, using three different condoms, yet - he maintains a "hard feeling" the entire time.
Now, I've bee
n around the block a time or two.
Never happened to me. Have I been with a guy who could recuperate and go again fairly quickly after the first time? Yes. But not in that same manner.
It just ticks me off that people write this stuff. I mean, get realistic!
It's the same thing I hate about Hollywood. I think they sell people the idea that romance and love is always wonderful, always easy and always wildly beyond anyone's expectations. It's not.
Mostly, it is great, but it's also a lot of work. Things don't happen like the movies or books most of the time.
I guess I'll try to finish my book this evening, even though I can sense where it's going. Ho hum. I should write my own, huh? (note: although it wouldn't be nearly as interesting to anyone but myself... I'm nothing if not practical).
I decided to get in bed and read. The book I'm currently reading is smut given to me by a friend. It's not a Harlequin Romance type book. It's smuttier, but with a better plot. Not exactly high-brow reading, but it'll do.
I read for about an hour and a half, then decided I should try to get some sleep. Of course, my brain is working overtime thinking about this book and a certain series of events that happened.
The basic gist of it is: A guy and girl are in love with each other, but were separated early on by a sequence of strange twists. 15 years later, they're in the same town again and she's being stalked by some maniac. He works security so he goes to her parents' house to check on the security and place some bugs. They end up having wild monkey sex for the first (and second and third) time all over her room.
Of course, he's packing some serious heat - I mean, would any guy in these novels have small or even average weiners? No, they're always ginormous. Fine, fine. I can let that go. Because at least that is realistic.
Here's what bothered me and I'll try to put this as delicately as I can. They have sex three different times, using three different condoms, yet - he maintains a "hard feeling" the entire time.
Now, I've bee
n around the block a time or two.Never happened to me. Have I been with a guy who could recuperate and go again fairly quickly after the first time? Yes. But not in that same manner.
It just ticks me off that people write this stuff. I mean, get realistic!
It's the same thing I hate about Hollywood. I think they sell people the idea that romance and love is always wonderful, always easy and always wildly beyond anyone's expectations. It's not.
Mostly, it is great, but it's also a lot of work. Things don't happen like the movies or books most of the time.
I guess I'll try to finish my book this evening, even though I can sense where it's going. Ho hum. I should write my own, huh? (note: although it wouldn't be nearly as interesting to anyone but myself... I'm nothing if not practical).
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Excessive Celebration
My mind works in odd ways. I’ll be drying my hair in the morning and weird, random thoughts pop into my head. I guess that’s good for blog writing though. It usually gives me a topic.
Yesterday, my thoughts were on football. It’s not football season - who knows why this stuff comes to me? It’s a gift.
My first thought was that the penalty for excessive celebration is stupid. In discussing it with the Evil Twin, he went even further and stated that there should be no penalty on taunting at all.
Taunting may be seen as poor sportsmanship, but excessive celebration? It’s like saying you can’t be thrilled that your kid brought home straight As. I mean, bragging about it to everyone within ear shot probably won’t make you a very popular parent, but it’s okay to be really proud of your child and maybe even take them to dinner or give them a few extra bucks at allowance time.
So, you got these guys who run the ball in for a touchdown, shouldn’t they be allowed to do a little dance in the end zone? I think so. It’s not an easy game.
The other thing that pisses me off in football is the two point conversion.
If the team I’m watching has someone who decides to go for the conversion, you can believe that I am going to be screaming at the TV: “You idiots!!! That almost never works!”
Put your kicker in, take the easier one point and then work your ass off for a field goal next time around if you really need the points.
The Evil Twin disagrees with my opinion, as he says that he’s seen games won by the two point conversion. Every time I’ve seen it, it usually ends badly. Very badly.
I guess I’m more of the “sure bet” type of person rather than one who likes to take chances.
The Evil Twin hinted around a couple of years ago that he'd love a Hines Ward jersey for Christmas. Guess what he found under the tree that year? An offical NFL jersey (home team version, in black - not the "away" jersey in white).
So, are there penalties or other things in football that you would change if you ruled the world?
Yesterday, my thoughts were on football. It’s not football season - who knows why this stuff comes to me? It’s a gift.
My first thought was that the penalty for excessive celebration is stupid. In discussing it with the Evil Twin, he went even further and stated that there should be no penalty on taunting at all.
Taunting may be seen as poor sportsmanship, but excessive celebration? It’s like saying you can’t be thrilled that your kid brought home straight As. I mean, bragging about it to everyone within ear shot probably won’t make you a very popular parent, but it’s okay to be really proud of your child and maybe even take them to dinner or give them a few extra bucks at allowance time.
So, you got these guys who run the ball in for a touchdown, shouldn’t they be allowed to do a little dance in the end zone? I think so. It’s not an easy game.
The other thing that pisses me off in football is the two point conversion.
If the team I’m watching has someone who decides to go for the conversion, you can believe that I am going to be screaming at the TV: “You idiots!!! That almost never works!”
Put your kicker in, take the easier one point and then work your ass off for a field goal next time around if you really need the points.
The Evil Twin disagrees with my opinion, as he says that he’s seen games won by the two point conversion. Every time I’ve seen it, it usually ends badly. Very badly.
I guess I’m more of the “sure bet” type of person rather than one who likes to take chances.
The Evil Twin hinted around a couple of years ago that he'd love a Hines Ward jersey for Christmas. Guess what he found under the tree that year? An offical NFL jersey (home team version, in black - not the "away" jersey in white).
So, are there penalties or other things in football that you would change if you ruled the world?
Monday, May 12, 2008
FLYing
After Buddy was born, we came to the decision to have me stay at home. Initially, I thought I'd be going back to work... I wanted to stay home, but it just didn't seem to be in the cards for us.
Then he was born so early and was only 3lbs, 12 ounces at 6 and a half weeks old when he was sent home from the hospital. My bosses were great and let me work from home for 12 weeks and by that time, Buddy was up to only 5 and a half pounds.
The Evil Twin and I felt it was best for me to stay home and take care of his almost round the clock care. It was tough because I really loved my job and my bosses, but my first obligation was to my son.
I decided early on that there would be no daytime TV. And that is something I've stuck with for over 10 years now. I mean, I do turn on the TV for the "quality" kiddy programming - more for background noise than anything. Sissy rarely pays attention to it.
I really needed some direction in life - it's hard adjusting from working full time to being a mom full time. I have always been the type who does better when I have a routine. So, I started incorporating little things into my day that became habits. Like the bed gets made before I get in the shower. That way, when I come back to our room to get dressed, the bed looks tidy.
A few years into my SAHM (stay at home mom) status, I heard about a website, Flylady. FLYing means Finally Loving Yourself. The website offers encouragement and solutions for SHEs (Sidetracked Home Executives). If you sign up for the mailing list, you get tons of email. I finally set mine to digest, so I only get one a day.
I am still in FLY larvae stage, even after all these years. I do follow the plan of getting up, doing my hair and make up and getting dressed. Flylady recommends getting dressed to include shoes, but hey, I'm a Southern gal and we don't wear shoes if we can help it!
During the warmer weather, I keep sandals by the door that I can slip on. In colder months, I do have to get socks and shoes from my room, but otherwise, I'm pretty much ready to go in a snap. Plus, I think I feel better about myself if I look decent. Even if I don't have any place important to go, I still like to look as if I do have somewhere important to go.
My days don't vary much, but that's okay. I like the routine. Even if I will remind myself 400 times today that "Today is Monday." LOL.
The Evil Twin is off today and he took me to Red Lobster for lunch (we didn't want to deal with the crowds yesterday). He is off tomorrow for the election, it's a regular day off for him, so he took today too so he could have a 4 day weekend. Of course, it's been cold and shitty just about the whole time. I'll be "off" this whole week since my routine will be out of whack. It's worth it to have him home, though.
Then he was born so early and was only 3lbs, 12 ounces at 6 and a half weeks old when he was sent home from the hospital. My bosses were great and let me work from home for 12 weeks and by that time, Buddy was up to only 5 and a half pounds.
The Evil Twin and I felt it was best for me to stay home and take care of his almost round the clock care. It was tough because I really loved my job and my bosses, but my first obligation was to my son.
I decided early on that there would be no daytime TV. And that is something I've stuck with for over 10 years now. I mean, I do turn on the TV for the "quality" kiddy programming - more for background noise than anything. Sissy rarely pays attention to it.
I really needed some direction in life - it's hard adjusting from working full time to being a mom full time. I have always been the type who does better when I have a routine. So, I started incorporating little things into my day that became habits. Like the bed gets made before I get in the shower. That way, when I come back to our room to get dressed, the bed looks tidy.
A few years into my SAHM (stay at home mom) status, I heard about a website, Flylady. FLYing means Finally Loving Yourself. The website offers encouragement and solutions for SHEs (Sidetracked Home Executives). If you sign up for the mailing list, you get tons of email. I finally set mine to digest, so I only get one a day.
I am still in FLY larvae stage, even after all these years. I do follow the plan of getting up, doing my hair and make up and getting dressed. Flylady recommends getting dressed to include shoes, but hey, I'm a Southern gal and we don't wear shoes if we can help it!
During the warmer weather, I keep sandals by the door that I can slip on. In colder months, I do have to get socks and shoes from my room, but otherwise, I'm pretty much ready to go in a snap. Plus, I think I feel better about myself if I look decent. Even if I don't have any place important to go, I still like to look as if I do have somewhere important to go.
My days don't vary much, but that's okay. I like the routine. Even if I will remind myself 400 times today that "Today is Monday." LOL.
The Evil Twin is off today and he took me to Red Lobster for lunch (we didn't want to deal with the crowds yesterday). He is off tomorrow for the election, it's a regular day off for him, so he took today too so he could have a 4 day weekend. Of course, it's been cold and shitty just about the whole time. I'll be "off" this whole week since my routine will be out of whack. It's worth it to have him home, though.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Not An Easy Road
I've had a lovely day. I did make dinner - ground beef was in the fridge and needed to be turned into meatballs. I froze some and used the rest to make a spaghetti dinner, so it was easy enough.
The Evil Twin and the kids have all been super sweet to me, but they're kinda like that every day. I always feel corny when I tell people how amazing my relationship with the Evil Twin is, I'm sure it seems unbelievable - but we continue to be just crazy about (and because of) each other, more and more each day.
We had been married for about three years when we decided to start to try to have a baby. Or should I say: when I finally nagged the Evil Twin half to bits and he relented. It took us nearly two years to get pregnant with a "keeper". (I had lost two before I met the Evil Twin, then had a miscarriage and an ectopic [tubal] before Buddy).
After Buddy was born so prematurely, the Evil Twin was leary about having a second child. I was also diagnosed with MS around Buddy's 2nd birthday, so that added to the Evil Twin's fears for the future. He worried that a 2nd child may be born even earlier than Buddy was or not fare as well as Buddy had. Plus, he worried about my physical limitations.
I had always wanted two children, though - and I wanted Buddy to have a sibling. After a few years of cajoling, the Evil Twin gave in, again.
It took two more miscarriages before the OB decided to test both of us for a host of possible problems. My chart was marked "Habitual Aborter" and my husband's work order sheet said, "Wife is habitual aborter" as a reasoning for the extensive testing.
The blood work turned up a blood clotting disorder on my part. It's called Lupus Anticoagulant. It's not an anticoagulant disorder as stated, but a problem with the blood clotting too thickly. This will result in repeated miscarriages unless treated. Treatment is twice daily injections of blood thinner medication.
I got pregnant for the EIGTH time. I started on the blood thinner. I lost another baby.
More Clomid, more trying and finally, pregnant again. (I tested 5 days before I expected Aunt Flo, so I knew VERY early on). Immediately start blood thinner. Hope for the best.
My HCG blood work all came back great. I started spotting. Thank goodness, it went away as quickly as it had started and we had a very early ultrasound. There was a blob with a blink, blink, blink - a tiny beating heart!
Two weeks later, we had another ultrasound. The blob was bigger and had an even stronger heartbeat. Sissy was on her way!
Blood thinner injected twice a day, morning and night. I also rented a hospital grade fetal doppler. I listened to her heartbeat every single day, as much as I wanted to listen in.
The Evil Twin and I were put on "pelvic rest". That means nothing poking my pelvis, nothing that would cause my uterus to contract (that means no sex and no orgasm, for those who might be confused).
Going thru everything I did to have my two kids was worth it. I'm soooo lucky and I realize that. For Buddy - coming into this world at just over 2 pounds and Sissy - over 500 injections and a lot of nervousness on my part. I'm incredibly blessed.
Happy Mother's Day to all my readers, to include my blog buddies who don't have children, but are dog and cat moms, special aunts and all around wonderful people. I hope you've had a terrific day!
The Evil Twin and the kids have all been super sweet to me, but they're kinda like that every day. I always feel corny when I tell people how amazing my relationship with the Evil Twin is, I'm sure it seems unbelievable - but we continue to be just crazy about (and because of) each other, more and more each day.
We had been married for about three years when we decided to start to try to have a baby. Or should I say: when I finally nagged the Evil Twin half to bits and he relented. It took us nearly two years to get pregnant with a "keeper". (I had lost two before I met the Evil Twin, then had a miscarriage and an ectopic [tubal] before Buddy).
After Buddy was born so prematurely, the Evil Twin was leary about having a second child. I was also diagnosed with MS around Buddy's 2nd birthday, so that added to the Evil Twin's fears for the future. He worried that a 2nd child may be born even earlier than Buddy was or not fare as well as Buddy had. Plus, he worried about my physical limitations.
I had always wanted two children, though - and I wanted Buddy to have a sibling. After a few years of cajoling, the Evil Twin gave in, again.
It took two more miscarriages before the OB decided to test both of us for a host of possible problems. My chart was marked "Habitual Aborter" and my husband's work order sheet said, "Wife is habitual aborter" as a reasoning for the extensive testing.
The blood work turned up a blood clotting disorder on my part. It's called Lupus Anticoagulant. It's not an anticoagulant disorder as stated, but a problem with the blood clotting too thickly. This will result in repeated miscarriages unless treated. Treatment is twice daily injections of blood thinner medication.
I got pregnant for the EIGTH time. I started on the blood thinner. I lost another baby.
More Clomid, more trying and finally, pregnant again. (I tested 5 days before I expected Aunt Flo, so I knew VERY early on). Immediately start blood thinner. Hope for the best.
My HCG blood work all came back great. I started spotting. Thank goodness, it went away as quickly as it had started and we had a very early ultrasound. There was a blob with a blink, blink, blink - a tiny beating heart!
Two weeks later, we had another ultrasound. The blob was bigger and had an even stronger heartbeat. Sissy was on her way!
Blood thinner injected twice a day, morning and night. I also rented a hospital grade fetal doppler. I listened to her heartbeat every single day, as much as I wanted to listen in.
The Evil Twin and I were put on "pelvic rest". That means nothing poking my pelvis, nothing that would cause my uterus to contract (that means no sex and no orgasm, for those who might be confused).
Going thru everything I did to have my two kids was worth it. I'm soooo lucky and I realize that. For Buddy - coming into this world at just over 2 pounds and Sissy - over 500 injections and a lot of nervousness on my part. I'm incredibly blessed.
Happy Mother's Day to all my readers, to include my blog buddies who don't have children, but are dog and cat moms, special aunts and all around wonderful people. I hope you've had a terrific day!
Friday, May 9, 2008
I Don't Believe in That
Disclaimer: This post is about my own feelings only in regards to myself and my own family. I have no problem with what anyone else does for themselves or their family.
I know I've groused about this in the past, but I really don't believe in sweatpants.
What?
That's right - I don't believe in sweatpants or sweatshirts or even those nylon tracksuits. I know stores sell them, but stores sell lima beans too - I'm not going to purchase either.
I don't consider sweats to be "real" clothing items. I don't own any (at all) and if I did, I certainly wouldn't wear them out in public. They'd be considered more "pajama" items. I don't buy them for my kids, either. I figure if they're not in the house, no one can wear them.
The Evil Twin does have a couple of pairs of sweatpants, but he only wears them around the house.
Speaking of clothing, I'm so bummed that the weather won't shape up. How am I supposed to get out in my hammock with my new swimsuit on and get any sun when there is NO sun to be got?
Actually, I only bought the top. I'm wearing a different, black bottom. I asked the Evil Twin if he thought the barely legal male lifeguards at the private pool we join each summer would enjoy my new tankini top and he figured they would. Any thoughts?
Of course, if the sun won't cooperate, NO ONE gets to enjoy my new swimsuit, not even me!
I'm going off to pout.
I know I've groused about this in the past, but I really don't believe in sweatpants.
What?
That's right - I don't believe in sweatpants or sweatshirts or even those nylon tracksuits. I know stores sell them, but stores sell lima beans too - I'm not going to purchase either.
I don't consider sweats to be "real" clothing items. I don't own any (at all) and if I did, I certainly wouldn't wear them out in public. They'd be considered more "pajama" items. I don't buy them for my kids, either. I figure if they're not in the house, no one can wear them.
The Evil Twin does have a couple of pairs of sweatpants, but he only wears them around the house.
Speaking of clothing, I'm so bummed that the weather won't shape up. How am I supposed to get out in my hammock with my new swimsuit on and get any sun when there is NO sun to be got?
Actually, I only bought the top. I'm wearing a different, black bottom. I asked the Evil Twin if he thought the barely legal male lifeguards at the private pool we join each summer would enjoy my new tankini top and he figured they would. Any thoughts?
Of course, if the sun won't cooperate, NO ONE gets to enjoy my new swimsuit, not even me!
I'm going off to pout.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Book Reviews
I posted a day or two ago about the Sex Ed book I bought for Buddy called What's The Big Secret? . I had purchased the book several months ago, but the Evil Twin and I were both a little hesitant to hand it over.
After we finally gathered up the courage, I - of course! - went back online to find a link to it so I could write about the great find on my blog here.
In looking over the relevant info on the page, I had somehow not really paid much attention to the "ratings" given by other buyers of the book the first or even second time I visited the page. By the time I searched for the link, I had a bit of extra time to give the reviews a cursory glance.
Some wack-a-do posted her (I'm assuming it's a mom) opinion on the book:
"By A Customer
While this book is colorful and covers many common questions, it is not for attachment parents - or any parent who wants to teach her child a more natural parenting approach.
It does have one breastfeeding picture, but it also includes pictures of baby bottles and a baby bottle-feeding, newborns in a hospital nursery, a hospital birth with the mom lying on her back (which is very difficult and can lead to unnecessary Caesareans), and a newborn crying (which is not really natural, and rarely happens in a waterbirth), and a bit of rudeness (a child calling another child "silly").
The book also states that puberty can start at "ten or twelve or fourteen" but many children are starting earlier these days (possibly from the growth hormones in cow's milk, a good reason to switch to organic milk), and they may feel worried if they read that statement.
Two better books are Welcome With Love by Jenni Overend and A Child Is Born by Lennart Nilsson. "
HAAAAHAAAhahaha. Oh, Good Gracious! Like any kid would transfer the images in a book designed to impart sexual education information to their real life thoughts (i.e. merely SEEING an infant with a bottle in it's mouth or a woman laboring on her back that might lead to c-sections). What the fuckery? This woman is a full-fledged, card carrying MORON. She deserves to be pimp slapped or at least taken down a notch in some form.
God help us if a child feels "worried" that they may go thru puberty earlier or later than the book states! And let's not forget that all the growth hormones in milk may be causing that phenomenon.
I'd like to contact this mother and also let her know that President Bush has been transmitting thoughts to her head by space aliens who eat non-organic space lettuce. They are also meat eaters.
Our son slept in the same room with us until he was 10 months old and our daughter shared our bed until she was 5 months old. I pumped and bottle fed Buddy (out of necessity) and nursed Sissy. We don't let our kids cry it out. But, I have to draw a line somewhere and this review is about the most asinine thing I've EVER read - in all my years on the innernets.
I hate people.
After we finally gathered up the courage, I - of course! - went back online to find a link to it so I could write about the great find on my blog here.
In looking over the relevant info on the page, I had somehow not really paid much attention to the "ratings" given by other buyers of the book the first or even second time I visited the page. By the time I searched for the link, I had a bit of extra time to give the reviews a cursory glance.
Some wack-a-do posted her (I'm assuming it's a mom) opinion on the book:
"By A Customer
While this book is colorful and covers many common questions, it is not for attachment parents - or any parent who wants to teach her child a more natural parenting approach.
It does have one breastfeeding picture, but it also includes pictures of baby bottles and a baby bottle-feeding, newborns in a hospital nursery, a hospital birth with the mom lying on her back (which is very difficult and can lead to unnecessary Caesareans), and a newborn crying (which is not really natural, and rarely happens in a waterbirth), and a bit of rudeness (a child calling another child "silly").
The book also states that puberty can start at "ten or twelve or fourteen" but many children are starting earlier these days (possibly from the growth hormones in cow's milk, a good reason to switch to organic milk), and they may feel worried if they read that statement.
Two better books are Welcome With Love by Jenni Overend and A Child Is Born by Lennart Nilsson. "
HAAAAHAAAhahaha. Oh, Good Gracious! Like any kid would transfer the images in a book designed to impart sexual education information to their real life thoughts (i.e. merely SEEING an infant with a bottle in it's mouth or a woman laboring on her back that might lead to c-sections). What the fuckery? This woman is a full-fledged, card carrying MORON. She deserves to be pimp slapped or at least taken down a notch in some form.
God help us if a child feels "worried" that they may go thru puberty earlier or later than the book states! And let's not forget that all the growth hormones in milk may be causing that phenomenon.
I'd like to contact this mother and also let her know that President Bush has been transmitting thoughts to her head by space aliens who eat non-organic space lettuce. They are also meat eaters.
Our son slept in the same room with us until he was 10 months old and our daughter shared our bed until she was 5 months old. I pumped and bottle fed Buddy (out of necessity) and nursed Sissy. We don't let our kids cry it out. But, I have to draw a line somewhere and this review is about the most asinine thing I've EVER read - in all my years on the innernets.
I hate people.
History
Back when I was in college, before I met the Evil Twin, I dated a guy - kinda on and off for a couple of years. His name was Spit (at least, that is what I'm going to call him for this story, because that's the name he went by during our punk years).
We had a volatile relationship. We were young and stupid. But there was a lot of passion in that relationship.
We ran around in the same small circle of similar minded punk kids. If you were into punk music at that time and you followed the shows that came to this area, I knew you.
The Evil Twin and Spit were friends for years before I had met either of them. At the point I met Spit, the Evil Twin was in the Air Force, stationed out in New Mexico. He had sent Spit a Christmas card that he had designed - I think it was a bloody Santa or something twisted like that. Spit showed it to me and said it was from his friend "the Evil Twin" (his exact words). I didn't think much more about it or that card until about three years later, when I did actually meet the Evil Twin.
By that time, Spit and I were long over, but we were still friends. We remain friends to this very day, in fact.
Anyway, he did not want me to get involved with the Evil Twin. Not like he had much of a say in it at that point.
I think by then, Spit liked to keep me around as a fuck buddy. I certainly didn't mind - he was a good lay. He also taught me a certain skill that shall remain nameless, but it's a good skill for a girl to have.
I had a wild past, but he and the Evil Twin were the only two people I've ever truly loved in my life. Of course, after 16 years of togetherness - hot and heavy since April 11, 1992 - I still love the Evil Twin.
I know some people are ashamed of their pasts. I'm not. I figure all the things I've done in my life have helped shape me into the person I am today. No regrets.
We had a volatile relationship. We were young and stupid. But there was a lot of passion in that relationship.
We ran around in the same small circle of similar minded punk kids. If you were into punk music at that time and you followed the shows that came to this area, I knew you.
The Evil Twin and Spit were friends for years before I had met either of them. At the point I met Spit, the Evil Twin was in the Air Force, stationed out in New Mexico. He had sent Spit a Christmas card that he had designed - I think it was a bloody Santa or something twisted like that. Spit showed it to me and said it was from his friend "the Evil Twin" (his exact words). I didn't think much more about it or that card until about three years later, when I did actually meet the Evil Twin.
By that time, Spit and I were long over, but we were still friends. We remain friends to this very day, in fact.
Anyway, he did not want me to get involved with the Evil Twin. Not like he had much of a say in it at that point.
I think by then, Spit liked to keep me around as a fuck buddy. I certainly didn't mind - he was a good lay. He also taught me a certain skill that shall remain nameless, but it's a good skill for a girl to have.
I had a wild past, but he and the Evil Twin were the only two people I've ever truly loved in my life. Of course, after 16 years of togetherness - hot and heavy since April 11, 1992 - I still love the Evil Twin.
I know some people are ashamed of their pasts. I'm not. I figure all the things I've done in my life have helped shape me into the person I am today. No regrets.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Overheard
I have to go grocery shopping at least once a week, and I typically choose to shop at the Wal-Mart. Let's face it, they don't always have the most charming and civilized shoppers, but the prices are good - and when I have to buy diapers, wipes, cleaning supplies, and other non-food items, with a toddler in tow - one stop shopping is my friend.
So, I went to shop on Monday. As I'm pushing my cart along, I hear a mother say to her two boys, "Shut up." And I don't mean the sarcastic "get out of town" type of shut up either. She said it very rudely.
And I thought, as I often do, "Those kids don't stand a chance." They're just junior assholes in training, thanks to their hateful mother.
I guess I should NOT be surprised by this type of behaviour after all these years, but I am.
You might be thinking, "Well, 'shut up' isn't that bad." In my book, genteel and civilized people don't tell one another to "shut up!"
In my world, it's stated, "Could y'all please settle down?" or "Please! Be quiet!" Granted, it works about as well as "Shut up!" but at least it sounds nicer.
Why any person would talk to another person - let alone a family member - like that, out in public no less, is beyond comprehension for me.
Please, don't let my kids grow up to be insouciant, rude, self-absorbed individuals. I hope they stand a chance.
So, I went to shop on Monday. As I'm pushing my cart along, I hear a mother say to her two boys, "Shut up." And I don't mean the sarcastic "get out of town" type of shut up either. She said it very rudely.
And I thought, as I often do, "Those kids don't stand a chance." They're just junior assholes in training, thanks to their hateful mother.
I guess I should NOT be surprised by this type of behaviour after all these years, but I am.
You might be thinking, "Well, 'shut up' isn't that bad." In my book, genteel and civilized people don't tell one another to "shut up!"
In my world, it's stated, "Could y'all please settle down?" or "Please! Be quiet!" Granted, it works about as well as "Shut up!" but at least it sounds nicer.
Why any person would talk to another person - let alone a family member - like that, out in public no less, is beyond comprehension for me.
Please, don't let my kids grow up to be insouciant, rude, self-absorbed individuals. I hope they stand a chance.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Saturday Night Special
Our family enjoys a special little treat on weekends, known affectionately as "Saturday Night Special". This means that someone (usually the Evil Twin) runs out and grabs dinner from any random fast food place.
Sometimes, it's on Sunday night if we skip Saturday. Like: this past Saturday, we had friends over for a cookout and thusly, did not have fast food on that night. So, Sunday found the Evil Twin on a mission to McDonald's for dinner.
My personal #1 is Wendy's, but I usually get vetoed because everyone is burned out on Wendy's, thanks to me.
Anyhoo..... I sent the Evil Twin to MickyD's and asked him to get two Happy Meals - one Mighty Kids meal and one regular with a sweet tea (the meal is for Sissy, but the sweet tea is for moi!).
At the drive thru window, he was told by the employee taking the orders, "I'm sorry, sir, but we're out of Happy Meals."
WTF???
How does a McDonald's RUN OUT of Happy Meals? Isn't that, like, their main draw? I mean, not many parents would voluntarily choose to eat their food if it weren't for the fun Happy Meals the kiddies enjoy so much.
And furthermore, couldn't the restaurant just sell him an order of chicken nuggets, a small fry and a drink for the Happy Meal price - even if they were out of Happy Meal boxes or bags or even toys?
Any reasonable human being would assume that would be the case, but no! He had to purchase the fricking nuggets, fries and drinks separately.
What a bunch of assclowns. As he was driving up to the window to pay, he heard the drive thru employee tell the lady behind him they were out of Large Cokes. I wonder if they were just fucking with people that day?
Sometimes, it's on Sunday night if we skip Saturday. Like: this past Saturday, we had friends over for a cookout and thusly, did not have fast food on that night. So, Sunday found the Evil Twin on a mission to McDonald's for dinner.
My personal #1 is Wendy's, but I usually get vetoed because everyone is burned out on Wendy's, thanks to me.
Anyhoo..... I sent the Evil Twin to MickyD's and asked him to get two Happy Meals - one Mighty Kids meal and one regular with a sweet tea (the meal is for Sissy, but the sweet tea is for moi!).
At the drive thru window, he was told by the employee taking the orders, "I'm sorry, sir, but we're out of Happy Meals."
WTF???
How does a McDonald's RUN OUT of Happy Meals? Isn't that, like, their main draw? I mean, not many parents would voluntarily choose to eat their food if it weren't for the fun Happy Meals the kiddies enjoy so much.
And furthermore, couldn't the restaurant just sell him an order of chicken nuggets, a small fry and a drink for the Happy Meal price - even if they were out of Happy Meal boxes or bags or even toys?
Any reasonable human being would assume that would be the case, but no! He had to purchase the fricking nuggets, fries and drinks separately.
What a bunch of assclowns. As he was driving up to the window to pay, he heard the drive thru employee tell the lady behind him they were out of Large Cokes. I wonder if they were just fucking with people that day?
Hilarity Ensues
Sometimes I feel like a nut. Oh, no, that's not right. Sometimes life is like a box of chocolates.
Oh hell, I don't know.
I'm a 40 year old gal with a ten year old and a two year old. I gave my oldest a book about sex the other day and today, I'm online ordering a free potty training DVD from the Pull-Ups people. (I love free stuff - sometimes it includes coupons!).
Yes, that's right... I'm approaching potty training stage with Miss Sissy. So far, she has shown zero interest. I even have a little "Hello Kitty" journal type book for her. It's got lots of shiny blank pages just BEGGING for a sticker or two.
With Buddy, we used the sticker bribery method of potty training - and I still have loads of stickers (I never throw anything away). So, I even used the stickers to put Sissy's name on the Hello Kitty book and showed her the big baggie of stickers. She was thrilled to see Spongebob and others in the bag, but none of this super hyped up-sell talk has hit home for her.
We brought the potty home when she hit about 18 months and we've been talking about it, clapping if she even gets near the stupid thing and just generally behaving like loons.
I suppose I'm going to have to break down and buy the daggone training pants things. Having already had one child transition from diapers to undies, I fully realize that any child will use the potty in their own time. I'm okay with that.
In an effort to not jinx myself, I won't talk about my hopes and aspirations for potty training sooner rather than later.
Oh, the gods of irony wanted me to get it and good when I got pregnant with a girl. I remember teasing my friends when Buddy was a tot: "Thank goodness I have a boy - he doesn't have to sit on those germy public toilet seats!" Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
And for those of you without kids, here's a little factoid: Children who are learning to use the potty like to visit EVERY. PUBLIC. TOILET. known to mankind.
This includes the filthy Wal-Mart restrooms aka "Good Lord. I think there's a brown light special going on in there."
I have a sneaking suspicion I'm about to embark on lots of visits to "see the whiz-ard" soon.
Wish me luck!
Oh hell, I don't know.
I'm a 40 year old gal with a ten year old and a two year old. I gave my oldest a book about sex the other day and today, I'm online ordering a free potty training DVD from the Pull-Ups people. (I love free stuff - sometimes it includes coupons!).
Yes, that's right... I'm approaching potty training stage with Miss Sissy. So far, she has shown zero interest. I even have a little "Hello Kitty" journal type book for her. It's got lots of shiny blank pages just BEGGING for a sticker or two.
With Buddy, we used the sticker bribery method of potty training - and I still have loads of stickers (I never throw anything away). So, I even used the stickers to put Sissy's name on the Hello Kitty book and showed her the big baggie of stickers. She was thrilled to see Spongebob and others in the bag, but none of this super hyped up-sell talk has hit home for her.
We brought the potty home when she hit about 18 months and we've been talking about it, clapping if she even gets near the stupid thing and just generally behaving like loons.
I suppose I'm going to have to break down and buy the daggone training pants things. Having already had one child transition from diapers to undies, I fully realize that any child will use the potty in their own time. I'm okay with that.
In an effort to not jinx myself, I won't talk about my hopes and aspirations for potty training sooner rather than later.
Oh, the gods of irony wanted me to get it and good when I got pregnant with a girl. I remember teasing my friends when Buddy was a tot: "Thank goodness I have a boy - he doesn't have to sit on those germy public toilet seats!" Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
And for those of you without kids, here's a little factoid: Children who are learning to use the potty like to visit EVERY. PUBLIC. TOILET. known to mankind.
This includes the filthy Wal-Mart restrooms aka "Good Lord. I think there's a brown light special going on in there."
I have a sneaking suspicion I'm about to embark on lots of visits to "see the whiz-ard" soon.
Wish me luck!
Monday, May 5, 2008
Movie Night and Sex Ed
It seems to be a movie themed weekend around town. The Evil Twin and I watched Sweeney Todd last night and even at about two hours long, it passed by like no time.
In this Tim Burton directed film, it is much like all of Burton's movies - dark, gritty, gloomy but with a wry sense of humor thrown in at unexpected times.
I can't really go into it too much, 'cause I don't want to give it away, but it's an interesting take on an age old dilemma (spurned party returns for revenge). Not something the kids'll need to see - it's fairly bloody and the ending is quite tragic.
Speaking of kids, I had bought a book for Buddy a few months ago: What's The Big Secret about sex and whatnot. It's written by the same guy who does the "Arthur" series and his wife, but it's not a little kid book. It's pretty straight forward, a bit too much info for my liking in some parts.
He is ten years old and I suppose I'd rather he get the right story from a book or from us than crazy, wrong info from friends. I'd like to think the kids at Catholic school don't know about any of this stuff, but I'm sure they're just as bad if not worse than any other kid. Hee.
I'm just really not ready for this. But, I have to think back and I do know that by the time I was his age, I knew the true scoop. Not because my parents were these amazingly open-minded individuals, but because they felt a love of books trumped any other love in life - nothing I ever read was censored. Ever.
One thing my dad and I did together, just the two of us, was visit the local library at least once every two weeks. I would check out as many books as my little arms could carry. And, I checked out books from all over the library, not just the kids' section.
I received quite an education reading all those books. It didn't turn me into some twisted monster (just helped develop my sick sense of humor a bit, I suppose), so I'm fairly sure that Buddy will do okay with this new information.
I gave him the book, told him to read it and to come to us if he had questions afterward. I hope there are no questions - ha ha - or at least none while the Evil Twin is at work. I told him that he would get to have "the talk" with Buddy and that I would take the driver's seat when it came time for Sissy to know stuff. I think that's fair.
In this Tim Burton directed film, it is much like all of Burton's movies - dark, gritty, gloomy but with a wry sense of humor thrown in at unexpected times.
I can't really go into it too much, 'cause I don't want to give it away, but it's an interesting take on an age old dilemma (spurned party returns for revenge). Not something the kids'll need to see - it's fairly bloody and the ending is quite tragic.
Speaking of kids, I had bought a book for Buddy a few months ago: What's The Big Secret about sex and whatnot. It's written by the same guy who does the "Arthur" series and his wife, but it's not a little kid book. It's pretty straight forward, a bit too much info for my liking in some parts.
He is ten years old and I suppose I'd rather he get the right story from a book or from us than crazy, wrong info from friends. I'd like to think the kids at Catholic school don't know about any of this stuff, but I'm sure they're just as bad if not worse than any other kid. Hee.
I'm just really not ready for this. But, I have to think back and I do know that by the time I was his age, I knew the true scoop. Not because my parents were these amazingly open-minded individuals, but because they felt a love of books trumped any other love in life - nothing I ever read was censored. Ever.
One thing my dad and I did together, just the two of us, was visit the local library at least once every two weeks. I would check out as many books as my little arms could carry. And, I checked out books from all over the library, not just the kids' section.
I received quite an education reading all those books. It didn't turn me into some twisted monster (just helped develop my sick sense of humor a bit, I suppose), so I'm fairly sure that Buddy will do okay with this new information.
I gave him the book, told him to read it and to come to us if he had questions afterward. I hope there are no questions - ha ha - or at least none while the Evil Twin is at work. I told him that he would get to have "the talk" with Buddy and that I would take the driver's seat when it came time for Sissy to know stuff. I think that's fair.
Saturday, May 3, 2008
Buzzardbilly and The Power of Suggestion
Okay, so most of you know that Buzzardbilly and I are friends in real life - she's known the Evil Twin for, literally, decades - since they were little kids.
We chat on the phone sometimes and she is always chock full of interesting information. The other day, she recommended I try the Steakhouse Burger from Burger King. She said it was really, really good. Well, the commercials had already intrigued me, but then a personal two thumbs up from a friend was practically a red carpet welcome to hit the BK.
We don't have a BK in our little area of town. The closest one is directly across from the Evil Twin's office. With visions of the Steakhouse Burger dancing in my head, I decided one afternoon that after I picked Buddy up from school, I'd take the kids to their dad's office and then we'd all have dinner across the street.
At the office, we all chatted with several of the Evil Twin's co-workers - they all love it when I bring the kids in.
The next day, a male co-worker came by the Evil Twin's office and told him how nice it was to see the family, etc. Then, he said, "Your wife is looking good these days. She's put on a little weight." And, then he did the international sign language for tits. The Evil Twin asked, "Were you staring at my wife's tits?"
Co-Worker: "Well, yeah."
TET: "They're really great hangers."
CW: "I bet you're having fun with that."
TET: "What do you think??"
So yeah - my bust was the topic of conversation at the office. Niiiice. I'm flattered? Sure, why not!
Oh! And the Steakhouse Burger? As big as my head and really tasty, but if I get it again, I'll order it without mayo. You know these fast food joints - they like to put about half a jar of mayo on sandwiches. Some sandwiches, I can wipe the bun off and be fine, but this one was a bit messier. Still damn tasty!
If you're dying to think of ways to consume about 5,000 calories in one sitting, I can highly recommend the Steakhouse Burger method!
We chat on the phone sometimes and she is always chock full of interesting information. The other day, she recommended I try the Steakhouse Burger from Burger King. She said it was really, really good. Well, the commercials had already intrigued me, but then a personal two thumbs up from a friend was practically a red carpet welcome to hit the BK.
We don't have a BK in our little area of town. The closest one is directly across from the Evil Twin's office. With visions of the Steakhouse Burger dancing in my head, I decided one afternoon that after I picked Buddy up from school, I'd take the kids to their dad's office and then we'd all have dinner across the street.
At the office, we all chatted with several of the Evil Twin's co-workers - they all love it when I bring the kids in.
The next day, a male co-worker came by the Evil Twin's office and told him how nice it was to see the family, etc. Then, he said, "Your wife is looking good these days. She's put on a little weight." And, then he did the international sign language for tits. The Evil Twin asked, "Were you staring at my wife's tits?"
Co-Worker: "Well, yeah."
TET: "They're really great hangers."
CW: "I bet you're having fun with that."
TET: "What do you think??"
So yeah - my bust was the topic of conversation at the office. Niiiice. I'm flattered? Sure, why not!
Oh! And the Steakhouse Burger? As big as my head and really tasty, but if I get it again, I'll order it without mayo. You know these fast food joints - they like to put about half a jar of mayo on sandwiches. Some sandwiches, I can wipe the bun off and be fine, but this one was a bit messier. Still damn tasty!
If you're dying to think of ways to consume about 5,000 calories in one sitting, I can highly recommend the Steakhouse Burger method!
Friday, May 2, 2008
Thursday, May 1, 2008
It's Almost Mother's Day
And this year, I have another mother to celebrate.
I was adopted as an infant. My parents' raised me and then adopted my brother (not biological) about three years later. We had a great life and were "privileged" growing up. My mom was unable to have children due to a problem with her fallopian tubes - a condition which today would be by-passed by IVF (in vitro fertilization).
My dad passed away in 2004 and my mom followed 14 months later. A year later, after searching for my biological family, I was contacted by my biological sister. Wow! We have the same biological mother and father. There is also a brother - but neither he nor my biological father want to be involved, and I'm okay with that.
My biological mother and father got married a few years after I was born and given up for adoption, had three more children (the 2nd son was stillborn) and divorced shortly thereafter.
My biological mother and I have a very good relationship. We talk on the phone at least twice a week and we're trying to plan a meeting get together for this summer. Last year, it was late July when we officially connected and with Buddy's school schedule, my biological mom's work schedule and the fact that my sister was finishing up nursing school, it just wasn't in the cards for us all to meet up then.
When I set out to find my biological family, I wasn't looking for a replacement family. And I'm still not looking for that. I had my family, my parents - and I loved, still love, them with all my heart. I miss them both every single passing day. Neither of them lived to see Sissy, and for that, my heart aches the most.
So, I'll be celebrating Mother's Day this year with another mother. That's really strange. How do you thank someone who loved you enough to give birth to you and then give the gift of a child to a couple who otherwise would have been childless?
I'll let you know if I figure it out.
I was adopted as an infant. My parents' raised me and then adopted my brother (not biological) about three years later. We had a great life and were "privileged" growing up. My mom was unable to have children due to a problem with her fallopian tubes - a condition which today would be by-passed by IVF (in vitro fertilization).
My dad passed away in 2004 and my mom followed 14 months later. A year later, after searching for my biological family, I was contacted by my biological sister. Wow! We have the same biological mother and father. There is also a brother - but neither he nor my biological father want to be involved, and I'm okay with that.
My biological mother and father got married a few years after I was born and given up for adoption, had three more children (the 2nd son was stillborn) and divorced shortly thereafter.
My biological mother and I have a very good relationship. We talk on the phone at least twice a week and we're trying to plan a meeting get together for this summer. Last year, it was late July when we officially connected and with Buddy's school schedule, my biological mom's work schedule and the fact that my sister was finishing up nursing school, it just wasn't in the cards for us all to meet up then.
When I set out to find my biological family, I wasn't looking for a replacement family. And I'm still not looking for that. I had my family, my parents - and I loved, still love, them with all my heart. I miss them both every single passing day. Neither of them lived to see Sissy, and for that, my heart aches the most.
So, I'll be celebrating Mother's Day this year with another mother. That's really strange. How do you thank someone who loved you enough to give birth to you and then give the gift of a child to a couple who otherwise would have been childless?
I'll let you know if I figure it out.
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