Friday, April 16, 2010

Friday Secrets

1. I'm not typically a person who hates other people. I can intensely dislike people and not want to be around them, but hatred is not something I typically feel. I realized last night that I do hate someone so much that when she posted to her blog that "if it wasn't for [her] dog, [she] wouldn't be here at all" my first thought was, "go ahead and do it, the world will be a better place"

Intellectually I understand that it's MY world will be a better place, but emotionally I feel like the whole world would be better without her crazy and bullshit.

When it comes down to it, I don't want her to die, I just want her gone.

2. I do more blogging, twittering, and emailing my friends than I actually do work... at work.

3. I submit to on a regular basis. It makes me giggle to know that my friends, colleagues and a couple cousins are known to visit and have no idea which ones (if any!) are mine.

4. Sometimes while I am having sex with my boyfriend I have dirty thoughts to get me off harder... like I am sleeping with my married boss and we are at his desk... or that I am the babysitter and am sleeping with the married father of the kids I watch while his wife is in the shower...

5. I try and love my body, I really do - but sometimes, I just feel so fat and gross I want to punish myself. The fact of the matter is, many people consider me to be sexy or even hot. Somedays I see it. Somedays I can't stand to look in the mirror.
6. I am still in love with my daughters father... I've loved him like no other man (including my ex-husband) he treated me like dirt... and yet...I still love him unconditionally... and was really hurt when he started dating someone else... even tho I was dating someone too...

7. I've developed a big crush on one of your readers... Here name is Chandra. From the tiny picture on her profile I can tell she's really hot and a very beautiful woman! I just enjoy her comments and her humor. 

8. I plan on marrying my boyfriend of less than 2 months.

9. I have a Twitter account and I only follow women on it. Women I have a huge crush on, including the sexy woman who is receiving this email. I wish I could sleep with all of you.

10. One morning last week, I spontaneously took a picture of myself in lacy lingerie for my secret honey while I was getting dressed. Then I put my clothes on and hurried out the door with my family. I sent the picture minutes later.... from church. Sorry Jesus.

And, a very special Mystery Cleavage shot. This one is impressive! :-)

Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Also, I received an email with just a name and the subject line of "secrets" but there was nothing in the body of the email - I don't know if that was just spam or if someone really meant to include content. If that is you, please resend and I will add it when I get it, okay? I'd hate to disappoint someone who wanted something posted. (Update - I got it. Secret #10!)


  1. Great secrets as always ETW... I didn't send one in this week but I should have. I will remember to submit for next week.

    Nice mystery cleavage too.. LOL

  2. Wowz. That first one is loaded with anger and loathing. I dig it. Happy Friday to ya ETW and to all. Cheers!!

  3. Nice chest shot -

    More of that please ;-)

  4. It's such a shame to cleavage shot had pasties...

  5. *sigh* i love fridays... this just makes my work day start out great... :-)

  6. Great ones! And the pasties made me giggle!

  7. Secret #1 - Hate like that is so unhealthy for the soul. But I so understand how you feel.

    Secret #4 - Me too...and it works :)

  8. I'm so glad there were secrets to read, you scared me yesterday when you said you didn't have any yet :-) And they are juicy, lol. I do love reading these.

  9. #1 - I soooooooo understand. Really.

  10. Wow.

    #1 - I agree.
    #2 - I'm jealous. I used to be able to do that, but added responsibilities have minimized my blog-time. :(
    #4 - it's called Fantasizing. And yeah, it works. :)
    #6 - I think you're my 2nd wife. Out of common courtesy, I won't say your name. But until you get over that, you'll ruin every relationship you ever try to have.
    #8 - I hope it works. Fortunately divorces are easier to come by than marriages are these days.
    #10 - nothin wrong with that!!! :)

    It'll be interesting to see if the boyz and girlz here like a hairy chest better than a cock pic. So far, seems like they do!

  11. Love the Boobie Shot! Very patriotic!! :)

    As always, awesome secrets. They always make my Friday

  12. Love me some secrets, ETW! You rule.

  13. Love the secrets and that cleavage shot was dead sexy ;-).

    Just realized I stole the "Glamorous Life" phrase from your blog. LOL...

  14. Great secrets...and I love that the cleavage shot is all sparkly.

  15. Say what??? ::I know who you are::: Thank you! ;)

    Nice cleavage shot...all I can think about when I see a man with that much chest hair is "40 Yr old Virgin" and the chest waxing scene! "Como se llamo"!! LOL!

  16. These secrets are making me laugh for some reason.. maybe it's the patriotic chest hair....

    Chandra - looks like you've got a fan... I think I know who it is too ;-)

  17. Man, I hope I don't ever get on Secret #1's bad side! LOL ;-)

  18. #1 : my mother will outlive me just to spite me. Nowt wrong with wanting 'em gone! (Not the dog mind - just the bitch)

    #2 : I do not do the 'W' word. Keep it up!!!

    #3 : I must have a look. Sounds bloody weird to me.

    #4 : Hussy!....;-)

    #5 : Avoid MacDonalds and you're cool.

    #6 : It's a 'man thing' babe. 'Treat em mean and keep em keen'.

    Wrong kind of man though. We aren't all shitheads. Find one that isn't and burn the dicks pics. Trust me. I was 'the wrong sort' myself once.

    #7 : Oh dear. Switch off the pc and find a life.

    #8 : Does he know?

    #9 : see #7 (and possibly find a shrink)

    #10 : hahahahahaha!!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!

  19. I've got one sexy and star spangled chest. Boo Yah. Cheers!!

  20. I envy #5. Every time I walk by a mirror or see my reflection, I immediately put my head down in disgust