Picture Day

Tuesday was picture day at Sissy's school. I knew it was coming up, but I didn't really give it much thought. I just woke up, found a cute enough outfit for her, brushed her hair and made sure her face was clean.

I started to wonder if I was just a bad mother. I mean, shouldn't I be all concerned about going out to purchase a NEW outfit, get her hair cut, etc. etc.?

Then, I got over myself. I only buy the smallest package of the school pictures. They're usually not that great. I think I take better pictures of the kids at home, anyways. (and it's cheaper!).

Upon reflecting on school pictures, I don't think Buddy had one taken the entire time he was in middle school.

Unlike my mother, I don't wait around with baited breath to get that envelope of school pictures as a memento of that school year, so that I can say I have every year of school pictures and then throw them in the picture pile in the end table.

In fact, I think many of us would like to pretend those pictures didn't exist. I was a child of the 70s and 80s. Not exactly the 2 most wonderful decades for clothing and hair styles.

One year, I just about fell off my chair - Buddy brought home the "pre-order" envelope from school for the pictures. There are always a few options, but the one I found the most interesting was an extra charge if you wanted your child's photo AIRBRUSHED (photoshopped) to remove "flaws", like acne, or glare off eyeglasses.

I mean, sure he's a teenaged zitster. I was too at his age - and I have the pictures to PROVE it. Also, the kid has been wearing glasses since he was 18 months old. We're used to seeing him with glasses. There's gonna be a glare, we've already established that years ago.

After a healthy dose of photoshopping, who would know if it was their child or not? Let's brush out the glasses, acne and braces...oh, and don't forget that unsightly group of freckles! I wonder how a child with a port wine stain/birthmark on their face would feel if their parents paid extra to have that birthmark removed from their school photos?

It's a sad state of affairs when children will grow up without embarrassing school photos to reminisce over in the years to come. If you don't have at least one (or more) shitty school pictures, you really haven't lived. Besides, we need that comedy gold for our own children someday, so they can say, "Mom, you were a total dork!"

Take it easy on this beautiful Friday, my hooligans!

Love,

My Man Boy

Buddy is growing up. He'll be 15 in January and I'm still not sure where the time has gone.

He is taller than me and wears the same size shoe as The Evil Twin.

He has facial hair and I caught a glimpse of his underarms over the summer when he had on a loose fitting t-shirt. He had a full-on afro going on in his right pit and judging from my excellent sense of smell, both pits are full of the man-boy hairs because dude rocks the BO to knock me out! Pew!

And yes, he has deodorant. No, he doesn't use it on a regular basis unless I hound him. I say things like "The ladies don't like a dude with BO." and hoping that will help, but I think his man-boy mind is more full of video game action and not much of the lady action (which, I guess, is kind of a good thing.).

I was at the Mart yesterday (my usual Monday haunt) and I bought him a pack of GOOD disposable razors. I figure I'll let him try a few out and see what he likes best before investing in the crazy expensive razors. Like the one the Evil Twin and I use.

Instead of the usual stink-eye, I actually got a heartfelt "Thank you" from him and I noticed the package was opened and one razor was out on the sink last night. He showers and does most of his stuff at night, but he uses the deodorant, toothbrush, mouthwash, Proactiv and hairbrush in the morning before school.

I bought the Gillette Sensor when it first came out. I was in college and I had heard great things about this thing. It was marketed at men, but I didn't care - it was still cheaper than any of the "bimbo" version of razors. I loved it so much, I still use it today and I even gave the Evil Twin one when we first met. The replacement cartridges are so out of this world over-priced and I am one cheap mofo, so I tell ET to put his used cartridges in a ziploc bag and I use those.

We all know facial hair can only take about 3 - 4 shaves before the blade is too dull for sensitive skin. However, leg hairs (and other spots I won't mention) can take a blade into the next century practically!

Anypoodle, my boy is growing up and I must say he is a fine man-boy. He gets on my nerves, but then again, he's 14. That's, like, his job. And the less I know about his job, the better.

Ahhh, teens. I hope I make it a few more years because it won't be long before Sissy is pushing all my buttons and we all know girls can be 10 times worse than boys.

With boys, you only have to be worried about one penis. With a girl, you have to worry about every penis on the planet.

I'll be surprised if Sissy isn't in therapy by her early 20s. ;-)

Have a great Tuesday, my hooligans.

Love,

Family Fun

One of the greatest joys of having children is getting to razz them for whatever reason. I like to use my concerned and/or serious voice when approaching some bizarre topic.

For example, Buddy and I were in the car and I looked at him and said, "Buddy, I happen to think I'm the best thing since sliced bread and if everyone around me would just feel the same way, things would be SO MUCH better."

His response, complete with eye roll: "Here we go again."

We went o Chick-Fil-A for dinner the other night. I said to Buddy, "I'm going to get the spicy chicken sandwich this time. Because I am spicy, ya know? Rawr!" No response on this one, other than the look that says, "Kill me, now, because my mom is clearly insane."

I redid my hair back to the bright purple. But, I did it after the kids left for school, so they saw me looking "regular" (as regular as it gets with me, anyway). Then I showed up at Buddy's school to sign him out for an orthodontist appointment. He came down the hall and I said, loudly, "How do you like my hair?"

Buddy: "grumble, unh, mermermer." Which is his teenage way of saying, "I have to go to my locker and get my backpack before we leave." Nice, he has learned the deflect and change the subject style of answering awkward questions. I'm proud of him.

He learned from the best, ya know?

And then we have Sissy. I'll let you all in on a secret, I was born with a congenital defect, very rare...I was born without a Shame Gene. On top of that, my gatekeeper is in the Bahamas sipping on Mai Tai's, so I'm just on my own here. The Evil Twin and I like to sing the "I like big butts" song by Sir Mix-a-lot. We also sing "Big Bottoms" by Spinal Tap.

It's just a treasure trove of songs about butts around here.

Over the weekend, Sissy was feeling creative. She drew an alien looking creature and it has a word bubble beside the mouth area. It says (and I quote) "The only way to get to this party is you have to like big butts and do not lie." There were two little misspellings: buts and liy, but I thought it was an excellent effort along with the fancy alien-ish artwork. Perhaps aliens are still working on their English language skillz, but obviously, they are much closer to perfection than most of the posts I see on Facebook and around the innerwebs.

It's my first day of not having to leave the house at all, except to pick up Sissy. It's an early dismissal day, though, and that means I pick up at 1 pm instead of 3pm. Still, it gives me a good amount of free time to catch up on housework. And with that said, I'm going to get back to it. Lots to do, little time to do it.

Have a great hump day, my hooligans! I will see you soon, same bat time, same bat channel!

Love,

The Graduate

I graduated from my therapy class yesterday! I kinda miss seeing everyone already, but we exchanged numbers/ facebook info, so we can keep in touch.

I dropped Sissy off at school this morning and came back home. Generally, I would drop her off and go to my class. That felt a bit strange, but I've managed to jump back into my old routine and am keeping myself busy...Well, not just busy, but BUSY! I still need to make 2 beds, vacuum, tidy up a bit, work on some laundry (already have one load in washer and one in dryer, get the bill paying up to date, go to the bank, make a few phone calls and go by Sissy's school to purchase her Book Fair selections. Plus, I need to swing by the grocery and pick up a few items.

I'll be even more exhausted than usual, but at least I can get more done since I'll have the extra 3 hours at home in the mornings now. :-)

I felt sad leaving my friends, but I also know that there is a waiting list for that program and someone who is in need right now can take my spot.

After I got home yesterday, the door bell rang and it was a delivery of flowers - for ME! It was from the Evil Twin (and the kids, although they didn't know of it until I told them). It said that my family was proud of me and that they loved me. Awwwww.

Now, if I can keep Bella from eating them, I can enjoy them for a while.

I have laundry to grab and fold now, so I will end this here. I will be back in action tomorrow - around the same bat time, on the same bat channel. I have so much to say!

All my hooligans have a great Thursday! I've missed you!

Love,

It's All Good

However, I'm still trying to find a "good" time for me to re-establish my bloggy habits.

I used to always write in the mornings, after the house was quiet (everyone at school/work). It was an easy way to ease into the day. Now, I hit the ground running Monday thru Friday mornings.

I have to get Sissy to school a bit after 8 am and I need to be at my therapy class by 9 am. My class usually is out just before noon, but I have to drive home, get lunch, do whatever housework I can squeeze in there before picking up Sissy at 3 pm.

It makes for kinda hectic days. Then, I volunteer at Sissy's class on Thursdays, from noonish to 3....just making copies and whatever else the 1st grade classes need.

Yesterday was day 30 for me (no hootch!), so the Evil Twin took me and the kids to the Hibachi Japanese House. We ate like pigs. I'm lining up other "rewards" for the future: new tattoo, day at the spa, dinners at some of my other favorite restaurants, etc. There's just no telling what I'll come up with!

How would you treat yourself? I need some suggestions here.... And, don't say "loads of wine" either. Because that's just not happening.

I'm going to try to cross a few things of my to-do list, so I'll check back in when I can!

Have a lovely Wednesday, hooligans.

Love,

Breaking All Da Rulez

Here I am, posting on a Saturday! What is my scoop?

I don't know. My delicate pea-size brain is overloaded with ideas, topics and stories to tell, however, my schedule Monday through Friday doesn't afford me many opportunities to really take the time to concentrate on putting words on the screen in any sort of meaningful fashion...then again, when has that ever stopped me??

Let's face it - my random blathering has always kept ME riveted, at least - but when my morning classes are over, I'll definitely have more time to lull you all into a warm and cozy stupor. You can thank me later! :-)

Anyhoot, many of you know I have a summer "uniform" (cotton top, not of the t-shirt variety, shorty shorts and sandals) and my winter "uniform" (some sort of lounge pants/pj pants, cotton top, not of the t-shirt variety, and shoes appropriate for cooler weather. I change into jeans before I head out of the house).

Soooo, I'm wearing my summer uniform and Buddy says, "Mom, those shorts you have on wouldn't pass the dress code at my school. Think about it." (Shorts must be long enough to reach the end of your fingertips while your arms are at your side).

I happen to have very long arms, so I'd be stuck wearing bermuda shorts or pedal pushers - I refuse to wear capris - and I'm not real keen on the length of shorts that would meet the dress code.

I said, "Well, it's a good thing I'm not a student at your school then."

Again, he said, "Think about it. What are you - 40, not yet 40?"

"It's not polite to ask a lady her age." I shoot back.

"What year were you born then?" he queries.

"I'm not falling for that bullshit, you can just do the math in your head. But, if it's burning a hole in your soul to know, the answer is 44." (secretly, I'm thinking: 'Ha! He thinks I'm not yet 40! Score one for momma!').

Buddy is 14, in High School. He should be a rebel without a cause. How did I raise such a stick in the mud? :::sigh:::

That doesn't mean I can't drive by his school in my wicked mini-van, windows down and stereo cranked to this:



And yes, I bought the CD.

Have an awesome weekend, my hooligans. Do what the ETW would do and never grow up, but at the same time, keep your noses clean. :-)

Love,

Doing It Like Dory

For those of you without small children, Dory is a character in the movie "Finding Nemo". She's a funny blue fish with a case of short term memory loss, so she forgets things almost immediately. She's a hoot.

But, one thing she always says is "Keep swimming, keep swimming, keep swimming."

And that's kind of how I view my life now (without the short term memory thing going on, though I DO get addled easily).

So, I just keep reminding myself to "keep swimming"....Keep going...Keep doing the "next right thing".

It's been 21 days since my last drink. If you're reading this on Tuesday, it'll be day 22!

Things between the Evil Twin and I are better than ever before. I think we both have a new found respect for one another. Almost 20 years of being together, 2 children and the everyday stresses of life in general made us lose sight of that respect.

I'm much happier these days. I indulge in many of the things I once loved with abandon. Reading is my number one activity. I also love green grapes and Southern Red Velvet Cake ice cream.

Of course, the Evil Twin and the kids are top of my priority list and we've been having a great time getting involved in things as a family.

If I'm lucky, I will attend 4 AA meetings this week. I try to squeeze them in according to time and location.

The people at AA are much like Chic-Fil-A employees. They're just so darn nice and happy, welcoming and very interested in offering help of any kind. Whatever planet the CFA employees come from must be the same planet the members of any given AA meeting are also raised on.

Giving up my security blanket has been very difficult, but it's time for ETW to grow up.... That doesn't mean the end of the purple hair, though. A girl has to have some fun in life, huh?

Hope my hooligans are doing great! Slowly, but surely, my regular routine is falling into place and that means I'll be able to spend more time on the ol' blog here and reading all the other blogs I've had to miss out on lately due my life-chaos.

Love,

Not Dead, Just Hanging On

August has not been berry, berry good to me.

Well, I guess it has been in a way, but I'd have to say more bad than good. The Evil Twin became increasingly frustrated and angry about my drinking. He talked me into a stint at rehab at the hospital.

What can I say? The food was good. The other patients were cool and I was happy to make some friends.

I didn't fare too well otherwise. I was discharged and got drunk that evening. Let's just say that went over as well as a turd in a punchbowl. The Evil Twin and I weren't getting along at all.

I ended up having to leave the house. Luckily, a friend from my recent rehab stint took me in and we took care of each other. I won't go into particulars, but after about a week, I was back home with the Evil Twin and the kids. And, now, I'm trying to catch up with all the things I missed in my absence.

The Evil Twin and I have a renewed commitment to one another and it's almost like we're starting over in love and life.

I've been scared straight. It's been 13 days tomorrow since I've had any alcohol whatsoever.

This is my new life. I'm happy here. I attend an outpatient rehab program in the mornings and attend an AA meeting every day (well, I have missed a day here and there due to scheduling conflicts). I enjoy my morning program and the AA meetings, too.

From now on, I'll leave the drinking to the amateurs. I've fought too hard to go back down the pathetic path I was on.

'Til next time,
Love,

Happy Birthday, Man of my Dreams

That's right! Today is the Evil Twin's 53rd birthday. Boy, I bet my mother in law feels old (he's her first born) :-).

I've known the Evil Twin since he was 33 and I was 23, so the years have just flown by.

2 houses, 2 kids, several pets along the way and we manage to stay busy. I appreciate that he is willing to do anything for our children and even though he has a temper, he does try to deal with my faults and defects of character. I think I do a better job of dealing with his faults, but that's just the way our personalities are.

Evil Twin - I do love you. I know I screw up all the time, but I'm working on it. Rome wasn't built in a day.

Love,

That Time of the Year

The start of the new school year is upon us. Our first day is August 17. I'm sure that day will be quick to get here. It always is when I am least prepared.

We have one newly entering High School (and I'm really not old enough to have a kid in High School), and one entering 1st grade.

We sent Buddy to a private Catholic school and spent a fortune on his education....He did better at the local public middle school.

Sissy has been at the public school all her teeny tiny little life. And, I.LOVE.IT.

The staff has been friendlier and more accessible - and we are out NO money - than the pricey private school. Our kids are both gifted in the smarts department.

School starts on a Friday! Sooooo stupid. Why not start on a Wednesday or something?

Anyway, it's looming large. I'm always a little nervous at the beginning of the year, but typically, it turns out fine.

I must say the families at the public schools are MUCH friendlier than the uptight bunch at the private school.

I went to a baby shower this past weekend for a mom whose son was in Sissy's kindergarten class. Everyone there was super nice and I was being my usual goofy self. They even laughed at my jokes - at the private school, I would have been looked at like I had a dick growing off my forehead for saying the same things.

Example: Mom at private school: "I've got 5 bottles of wine in my Nissan." Mom #2: "We just got back from wine country for our anniversary. I have 4 cases of wine in my Volvo." Me: "Well, I have a box o' wine in my fridge." Not even a snicker...They could have at least given me a pity laugh! Beyotches. (Actually, I like Volvo mom - She's uppity, I recognize her as such, but I also respect her. The other one just got on my last nerve, plus, she wasn't friendly to the children).

I guess what I'm trying to get at here is that I really like the public schools (the ones in our district at least).

I meant to post this yesterday, so I hope y'all had a happy Monday and I wish you a happy Tuesday as well. I miss my hooligans and can't wait to get this stupid cast off so I can type the "regular" way (as opposed to the slow hunt n' peck.)

Love,

Just Call Me Grace

I went to the Mart on Monday - just to pick up a prescription and some cat food. It was just me n Sissy.

We had just walked into the front doors, but before the 2nd glass doors where the carts are.

Suddenly, I was plunged ass over tits, the entire contents of my handbag tumbling out. I had on my Croc flops (my Croc flip flops I bought at Disney World - they have cute Mickey Mouse heads on them ).... Anyhoodle, I guess the rubbery sole stuck to the floor and I went down.

Because my handbag was on my left arm, I held out my right to break my fall. All it did was break my wrist.

Like the little trooper I am, I completed my shopping despite the excruciating pain. I mean, I was already there.... I wasn't wasting gas just to go back home empty (but still broken) handed.

I went for an xray that evening and was called on Tuesday to confirm my suspicions and got an an appointment for the orthopedic doc on Wednesday.

The day after my fall, my hand looked like this:

By mid day Wednesday, I left the docs office sporting this purple cast:

Yes, I am right handed and because I had two little breaks, they had to set the cast with my thumb immobilized and all jacked up out to the side. At least I still have a career as a hitchhiker. I can do some tasks with my first finger and cast in stone thumb, but writing isn't one of them.

I can still type, albeit slowly. So, my posting promises to be even more sporadic than usual.

I broke this wrist in the same place when I was 10 and wore the cast (without the jacked up thumb setting) for 6 weeks.

I have an appointment to go back in 3 weeks to get another xray...I'm hoping that means I have a chance to get this sucker off earlier than 6 weeks. I know it's going to be stinky, withered and weak, but maybe I can get a week-ish to recover before school starts on August 17th.

Ironically, just when I have loads of stuff to share, I may have to pace myself since even typing is time consuming for me. Bad for me, good for you? Debatable. I guess it depends on if you need some mediocre reading material on any given day or not.....Lucky you!!! It'll be like the mystery grab bag at the dicey beach mystore on The Strand. Only cheaper. :-)

And,that's it, my hooligans. Enjoy your Friday and weekend. Try doing chores with your non-dominant hand for a day and get a glimpse into ETW world. To experience the pain, I recommend a hammer to the wrist. Otherwise, just go for the one hand thing.

I'm sorry to seem like I'm whining - but, really, I'm just trying to make light of it. Some people are born without limbs or lose them entirely later in life. You learn to make the best of it and learn new ways to function. I have always had the utmost respect for those who won't be "the same" in 6 weeks or whatever. They gallantly overcome many challenges and live amazing lives. Now, my respect is really brought back to the forefront.

That's my story of shopping at the Mart and eventually getting a purple cast. Anyone want to swing by and help with re-doing the color in a week or so? You can see me *naked*. LOL.

Love,

Staycation

The Evil Twin had last week off work. We're still trying to recover from the power outage. We were able to do a bit of work - calling the insurance to make a claim, The Evil Twin and Sissy spent a long time in the yard picking up debris. You know, that sort of thing.

We also got some relaxing in, so that was nice.

I'm glad to be back in my regular routine, though.

That means laundry, y'all. Lots of it. Hot laundry on hot days is really not much fun.

During our nearly weeklong plunge into darkness, we contemplated washing undies in the utility sink and then in a true white trash fashion, hanging them out back on a line. Thank goodness I had some items in the dryer (already dried, but not removed) that I'd been working on before the no power debacle and I was able to find enough clean items to cover us for a few days (while we desperately said prayers for electricity).

We did not have to resort to the back yard line with undies hanging on it. Whew! I think I would have just driven to the nearest open store and bought new packs of undies for the crew. Although the Evil Twin doesn't like to wear things until they've been washed, I suppose he would have sucked it up and worn brand new ones.

Ah well, back to my boring regular life...not having to think about ways to provide food that didn't involve electricity. We actually bought sterno and would have been out on the patio like a bunch of hobos if necessary. Luckily we only had to endure "Little House on the Prairie" inconveniences and not those that would have made us look like hobos.

Happy Monday, hooligans!!

Love,

In The Dark

Since Friday, June 30th - about 7:30pm - until Friday, July 6 around 4:30pm, we didn't have any power in the house. We had some big storms roll through the area which left about 500,000 people without electricity. Some people are STILL without power.

It stunk big time. We did the best we could. Almost all the restaurants lost power, grocery stores, gas stations and NO ONE had any ice.

Since we had no power, we had no way to charge our cell phones and no access to internet service. The Evil Twin was able to charge our phones in his car on his way in and out of work, so when mine did have a charge, I would try to check the news channels and let people what was going on and why they couldn't reach me.

Of course, this had to happen on some of the hottest days we've had this year. It didn't take long for the house to become sauna-like. Luckily, we had our lower level, which is mostly underground and stays cool year-round.

Unfortunately, by day 3, we had to toss out everything from the freezer and fridge. I had been shopping not long before and most of the food we tossed hadn't even been opened yet.

The Evil Twin had arranged to take the Thursday and Friday after July 4th off work, so he could enjoy a long weekend. However, since we didn't have power, AC, food, etc., he decided to just go in those 2 days and take this week off instead.

I am not even going to jinx us by saying anything more about the power. Maybe just to say I was born in the right time period. There is no way I could live like that every day. We did have water (some people didn't) and our water tank is gas heated, so at least we got decent showers. I just couldn't use my hair dryer, which resulted in some interesting ponytail looks.

I missed you guys and my internets a whole bunch and I hope you missed me too. I didn't fall off the face of the earth, just had to live like a pioneer woman for a few days. LOL.

Hope all my hooligans have a great Monday! (with electricity):-)

Love,

Middle Aged Hipster? No, Zitster

I love my moisturizer, I couldn't go a day without it. I use some other products on my face, but nothing has changed in a very long time.

That's why I'm surprised I've had three blemishes recently. I've been half-assed using Buddy's Proactiv. It might work better if I actually did the entire routine.

Why must I be so disgusting? I think I'm a bit long in the tooth to be sporting blemishes...Although I am apparently not too old to bleach and color my hair purple again.

I had let it go and dyed it all back to my original color (or the closest match thereof), because my hair had been abused by bleach and dye for far too long. I decided to give it a break.

I have a friend whose son was in Sissy's Kindergarten class. They became fast friends and we enjoy doing things with the family. We were at a birthday party for another classmate a few months ago and I said something about being 44.

She said, "You're not 44!" I said, "Yes, I am. I was born in 1968." We became FB friends shortly there after. Her birth year? 1985. I was a junior in High School.

But, I guess it's a nice compliment that she doesn't think I look my age and that she enjoys our conversations and spending time together. I have been that way most of my life too - i.e. being the oldest child in my family, I've always related better to people who are considerably older than myself. I can get along fine with others who are considerably younger than myself, too, but I've tended to gravitate to older friends.

Now that I've reached that "older friend" status/age, I should rethink my friendship picking strategy. After all, maybe they can give me advice on dealing with these blemishes!!!

Happy Wednesday, hooligans. Have a great one!

Love,

A Bird in the Hand

My day yesterday was completely thrown off when I went to check the mail. Usually, I'll go down the front steps, but I was cleaning up the kitchen after lunch and was closest to the back door.

I like to keep the door open, so we can enjoy some sun through the storm door. Bella, the cat, enjoys it too. It's like Kitty Kable in our backyard with squirrels, birds, rabbits, etc.

When I went out and got to the bottom of the concrete steps, I saw an itty bitty bird just sitting there. I kept my distance for a bit and observed it. He (?) kept opening his little beak and chirping. He could hop around, but not fly.

I looked up into our trees to try to find a nest he may have fallen out of and didn't see anything. I knew if I left him there, he would most certainly die. I also knew I shouldn't touch him.

I sat on a stair and kept watching. Finally, I decided I had to do something.
Since we have the two parakeets, I keep a smaller cage in case there is any emergency situations and one or both need to see a vet. The parakeet cage is actually large enough for Cockatiels and not easy to transport.

I scooped up the little fluffy feathery dude and called for Buddy to help me get the smaller cage. I got pooped on a couple of times. Blech! But, the little fella was obviously scared.

He seemed okay in the cage, while I called a local vets. Amazingly, they had an employee (a vet tech) who has cared for and hand raised several wild birds, getting them healthy with special food and then releases them back into their natural environment.

Sissy and I loaded into the car and Mr. Feathers got to ride shotgun, with the seat belt around the cage. :-) We took him in and in short order, the empty cage was returned to us. I spoke to the tech, just to make sure he would be well cared for. The receptionist I had spoken to earlier on the phone told me that little ones who fall out of the nest typically don't have good odds, but I was confident that this lady would have the resources and knowledge to give him the best chances.

Sissy was heartbroken that we weren't bringing the little bird back home with us. She cried for a long time. I told her we did the best thing for him and that he would be safe and happy there. She said she didn't care about any of that, she was just sad we'd never see the little guy again.

I recolored my hair purple and rescued some wildlife. Pretty cool day, huh?

Have a great Tuesday, hooligans! And remember, always stop to rescue an animal in need. :-) It makes your heart feel 3 sizes larger! :-)

Love,

WV Day

Was yesterday. June 20 marks the day WV officially seceded from Virginia and became its' own state. It's been 160 (? - Don't ask me, I'm an import) years and people STILL don't realize WV is NOT the Western part of Virginia.

Placing an order on the phone:

ETW: "Yes, West Virginia."

Customer Service Person: "I have a cousin who lives in Roanoke. Is that close to where you are?"

ETW: "No, West Virginia and Virginia are separate states. Roanoke is in Virginia." (in my head: "Did this person really graduate from high school?").

CSP: "Ohhhhh."

I think that's why WV is shaped like a big F You to the rest of the US. Look at it:



Turn your right hand, so your palm is facing you, and try it. ;-) You'll see the obvious evidence that the people of WV have a great sense of humor!

The Evil Twin had the day off, so we went to the grocery and did a couple other errands. It was a good relaxing day and we were able to get stuff done around the house and chill a bit, too. :-)

Hooligans, I hope you have a lovely Thursday. And, I will be back soon!

Love,

The Nerve

I survived (barely) the dance rehearsal/recital weekend. Friday evening, I spent 5 miserable and cold hours watching the rehearsal. It was just me and Sissy. We arrived home at midnight because she was starving (I wonder why?), so I got her McDs. I also needed to put gas in the van, so it was just a very, very long ordeal.

We had to be back at the auditorium by 1:30 on Saturday, even though the show didn't start until 2:30. I am a "follow the rules" person, so we were actually a little early. Sissy's first routine was #12 on the list of 40 (!!!!), not including #41, the grand finale. In fact, in the line up, her group was #12, #27 and, wouldn't ya know it, #40.

It started a little late (imagine that!) and I decided we'd be leaving after her last routine, but before the finale. We got out of there at 7P! The Evil Twin and I were freezing and starving and our butts were numb from sitting in the not so comfy seats.

When I took Sissy up to the staging area - where they line up the dancers about 3 to 5 dances back - I wanted to let someone know not to hold her backstage for the finale, but to release her to me.

I saw another mom, a mom I know and in fact, lives just up the street from us and I've known her for several years, since we all attended the same pool. She had been working backstage, and her daughter is one of the main dancers, so it seems they're always hanging around. But, I knew that she would be able to help me...I just needed to know who to speak to about getting Sissy after the last routine.

It was obvious I was standing at the doorway for a reason. She was busy looking thru some costumes, so I stood back and waited until she was done with whatever, then - GET THIS - she turned and looked at me, smiled, turned and walked away! I even had my mouth open to ask, "Who can I speak to about....." I didn't even get one squeak out.

I KNOW she knows that place like the back of her hand. I also know she could've answered my question or if not, directed me to someone who could.

I get snubbed like that a lot. I get dissed on Facebook by people I thought I had some semblance of a relationship (guess I cared more than they did). Almost all of the moms at the pool stopped speaking to me after a few summers.

I didn't do or say anything offensive. I didn't use bad language (I rarely do). I know I am not like most moms, but I certainly try to blend in regarding certain situations.

Am I really a terrible person? Is it my breath? I'm just not sure.

I'm not brokenhearted or anything. I don't need more friends. I've always kept a couple or three close to me all my life and am not the social butterfly type.

However, I am also not so petty to ignore someone just because there may be something I don't particularly like about them. Oh well.

Have a great Monday, hooligans! I still have errands to run! Yahoo (not). :-)

Love,

Make The Glitter Go Away!

I like to wait 'til the last minute, so today, I've been putting Sissy in her costumes (total of three), taking notes on what needs to be taken in, etc. I really only have one ballet skirt that will need a pin and one tap costume belt that will need a pin.

One outfit makes her all itchy and the clip on earrings she has to wear for two routines pinch her ears half off.

It'll be interesting when Saturday rolls around and I'm backstage doing her hair and make up. I considered false eyelashes, but figured that might go over as well as a turd in a punch bowl. She is NOT my prissy girl who just goes along with people (Mom, for example), pulling her hair, curling her hair, making her sit still for mascara, eyeliner and lipstick.

I went and bought her some make up that will be flattering to her skin tone - she is lighter than me. But, I do understand the need to really overdo the facial definitions. If not, she will just blend in with the scenery and not be seen from the stage lights. It's nice to have been sent to several charm schools and then learn from the best: the Drag Queens.

My little tartlet will look amazing...or at least as amazing as I can get her to be until she throws a fit and say "Fuck it. Go on with your bad self." My patience only runs so far.

I have a sneaking suspicion that I will be worn out by Saturday evening. I think this will be the end of the dance lessons.

This is a fitting example of "be careful what you wish for.", huh? Momma's not as young as she used to be.

AND, at this point, the house is covered in glitter and sequins.

Stay tuned. Tomorrow, I have a tale of Three Turtles. If I didn't love these kids so much, I would have gone bonkers a looooong time ago!

Have a happy Thursday, hooligans. Please say a prayer or send good thoughts my way for this evening. I can't say why - it's nothing like I might have cancer or anything near that pressing, but I'm gonna need some courage. Thanks, guys.

Love,

1234

Or 12:34...This is post 1,234 and it is exactly 12:34 on the clock right now. I have a friend who loves it when she looks at the clock and it's 12:34, because all the numbers are in a row.

Personally, I like 4:22, but I haven't seen that time in the AM in a loooong time.

Anypoodle, I guess over 1200 posts is not to shabby in the scope of things. I don't always have anything interesting to say, but when I have diarrhea of the mouth - LOOK OUT!

We're gearing up for Sissy's Dance Recital this Saturday and there are so many things to remember/do. I still haven't tried on her ballet costume, the tap costume was a wee loose in the shoulder straps when I tried it on her in February, so either: Let's hope she has grown or feel sorry for me trying to take up those straps with a needle and thread.

And, yes, I do have a sewing machine (squeee!), but it seems like an awful lot of trouble to haul out just to tighten 2 little straps. I'll just pin it and do it by hand, if necessary. Friday evening is the dress rehearsal, so I need to work quickly.

I also have mounds of laundry, kitchen work and grocery shopping. I need to find time to sort thru bills (not as quick and easy as most people think).

Alright, hooligans, I'm off to check the laundry and take care of a couple other little things, then Sissy and are off to the Mart. :-) I hope you have a Happy Hump day!

Love,

A Week of Summer Fun

We've been busy this week. I'm trying to catch up on housework, banking and trying to keep the kids entertained.

In our little burg, they're having a Fair/Carnival for the first time since the early 70s. They're raising money for a community center for the younger people in our area.

Our two kids had never been to a rickety old carnival before, so we figured it might be fun for all. I invited a friend of mine and her two boys (the younger one and Sissy are good friends) to come along with us. She doesn't drive and the family only has one car. Her husband works long and late hours, so I figured they get bored in the evenings - they were thrilled that I thought of them, although it was really nothing on my part. Giving a friend a hand is never a big thinking process for me - Generally, I'm a "more the merrier" type if I know the "more" well.

We didn't tell the 3 smaller kids what was going on. I did tell Buddy, but I said, "You can't tell the poo poo diaper babies what we have planned because it's a surprise." It was funny to listen to the smaller kids try to guess where we were heading.

When they spotted the ferris wheel, they all went bonkers...Except for Buddy, who at 14, is way too cool for that sort of display of happiness. He DID have a good time, though and rode several rickety rides with my friend's 9 year old, who was too tall to ride the same rides that Sissy and her Bestie were under the height limit to ride (the "kiddie" rides).

Here they are entering the area of the carnival:



They held hands or were hugging each other all night. :::Swoon::: I love my future in-laws! :-)

Of course, it was the typical carnie atmosphere. Complete with toothless individuals with crappy prison tattoos, but it was fun and crowded, but not too crowded.

I told the children that they just haven't lived until they eat carnie food from some dude with a herpe on his lip. Even I had a funnel cake. Who doesn't at a carnival? Those things are tasty as all get out. And yes, I did have diarrhea this morning. Thanks for asking.

I've got to run off and plan dinner and also deal with laundry. I hope all my hooligans have a super happy Friday and a wonderful weekend!!

Love,