The greatest thing about kids is that they are the Kings or Queens of the one-liners. It's not worth visiting a comedy club if you have children. The kiddos are MUCH funnier, even if they don't mean to be.
For this one, I think I'm going to go back into Buddy's toddler-hood and share a few stories that really cracked me up.
In the Summer of 2001, Buddy was 3 and a half. In the hottest point of July, I had to run out and do a few errands. When I came home, my entire shirt was soaking wet from the humidity and sweat. (nice....sexy, huh?)
So I decided to change into a plain white t-shirt and completely remove my underwire bra while I cooled off a bit. During the changing process, I was shirtless, braless and leaning over my shirt drawer of the dresser when Buddy came charging into the room.
He screamed, "Mommy, what's that? That, right there?" as he pointed at my naked breasts.
I looked behind me and asked, "What?"
Buddy said, "Those right there! Are those your penises?"
Later, I told the Evil Twin that if my tits looked that bad, I was in worse shape than I had imagined.
I had to give the kid credit for proper pluralization of the word "penis", though.
Another time, he was about 4-ish and in preschool. When he wasn't in school on Monday, Wednesday and Friday from noon to 2:30, we liked to watch Sesame Street together.
One episode featured Grover in Nicaragua showcasing how adobe bricks were made. The men and boys working on the bricks were clad in only shorts.
I mean, it's hot there in Nicaragua and those people do lots of physical work!
After a few minutes of watching the activity, Buddy turned to me and said, "Mommy, I know why they call that place Naked Agua - because those people are half-naked!"
Happy Naked Water Day!