Menfolks, You Don't Want to Read This

I am serious as a heart attack here. DO NOT read this if you are squeamish about "female issues".

I had a hysterectomy in early September. It's still one of the best moves I've made in life, according to me.

Through the grace of God and my stubborn willfulness, I managed to give birth to the 2 children I always wanted. After that, I figured all that inside junk was just cancer waiting to happen. It took me a few years to convince my OB/GYN that the junk just needed removal. I was able to keep my ovaries, so while I am peri-menopausal due to my age, I do have the "good" hormones working for me - at least for a bit.

The thing I am happiest about is no more monthly "female trouble". I started at 12 and even back then, I opted for OB tampons because they seemed less intrusive and easier to use. The thing is, you have to actually touch your va-jay-jay with these. There is no applicator. Those applicator types always skeeved me out.

After the "deed" is done, you have to dispose of the "soiled" applicator. And all that crap goes into a landfill. The plastic ones can take years to decompose. Plus, it's filthy.

This is coming from your conservative correspondent who does not believe in Global Climate Change (global warming) or any of that other horse shit. I just believe in keeping the Earth clean. WHY do ladies still use the plastic or even the scritchy cardboard type tampons when they could use OB or the Diva Cup?

If I had known about the Diva Cup before my surgery, I would certainly have invested in it. Sure, it seems icky, but it's YOUR body. Why would anyone be ashamed to touch their own body parts?

For females, menstruation is a fact of life. It's the giver of life, if you want to see it that way. You ovulate, the lining of the uterus builds up a "nest" for a fertilized egg and that's the way things go.

However, I find the people who would perch in a tree for months to save it from loggers don't want to touch their own lady parts with their hands. WTF???

Follow the lead of this Conservative Republican and save your smarmy plastic tampons applicators for some other use, not in a landfill. That's what is the grossest thought of all. Not that someone touched their own hoo-ha.

You can always wash your hands. You can't always save the environment.

Happy Tuesday, hooligans!
Love,



P.S. It is Jeff Kay (from the West Virginia Surf Report)'s birfday. Get over there and wish him happy happy! (Sorry to tack you on the end of a period post, Jeff. You know I love ya!)