Monday, January 11, 2010

Like A Cluster of Grapes

For Christmas, Santa brought Sissy a little play kitchen with some plastic foods. She already had a shopping cart and foods that were hand me downs from her brother, so this gift just rounded out the fun she could have with meal preparation. (Just wait 'til she gets older and meal prep is the bane of her existence as it is mine!).

One of the plastic foods in the set is a cluster of grapes:

Cute, huh?

Well, every time I look at these grapes, all I can think about is a story the Evil Twin told me years ago.

Way before he and I ever met, he worked at a grocery store as a stock boy. While he and his co-workers were hanging around shooting the bull, one co-worker said he had "hemorrhoids like a cluster of grapes" coming out his ass.

Now, while this is a funny scenario to imagine, I also have to think it must have been pretty painful to have that much hemorrhoid action on ones' butthole. How did he wipe? I'd say: very gingerly.

And this was back in the days before the convenient little boxes of wet wipes were all over the place.

Frankly, if it were me, I'd be seeing a doctor about that business.

Life's too short to have a sore bunghole all the time!

Funny enough, when I see grapes at the grocery store, I never think about it. They're big bags of grapes. But, when I see this plastic "cluster of grapes", I think of the hemorrhoid story.



  1. holy crapola!!!

    that's horrible, really..

  2. LOL... OUCH! Wonder if he still has them?

  3. OH that is so disgusting...poor fella...OUCH!

  4. Great ... now I'll never look at grapes quite the same ...

    Thanks! You've ruined me for life!! *snicker*

  5. I'll never be able to look at another cluster of grapes again...


  6. i once saw truck driver get out of his truck, pantless of course, with carbunkles like clusters of grapes.

    i'm so glad i got fired from that job.

  7. Sorry....but those plastic grapes look like what I imagine fish farts would resemble.

  8. Thats exactly what I thought of when I saw the picture, quite honestly.

  9. ewwwwww...& LMAO!!! pun intended! ;)

  10. I love you, Woman! Thanks for the chuckle.

  11. What do think would be a suitable wine and cheese to go with those grapes?

  12. Grapes? I thought was some sort of new adult toy.

    Yikes! Be glad the Evil Twin's co-worker didn't have access to YouTube back then.