1. I used to look at gay porn before work. Now I look at it after dinner too. My wife would be disgusted if she knew.
2. I wish I knew Living Laura better.
3. I have a crush on my best friend's sister. I don't know if it's because shes hot or if it's because she looks just like him and I have a latent homosexual attraction towards him
4. I'm naked right now.
5. I'm afraid to have sex with black chicks because of the image of roast beef wrapped in a brillo pad comes to mind, but I still think they're sexy.
6. I have a long-running lust for peggy bundy.
7. I only put milk in my coffee if I'm giving my girlfriend jizz.
8. I'm turning 30 and I still like watching old Transformers cartoons.
And those are your Friday Secrets. Sorry I'm late with them. I just can't get motivated today.