799. The Dinosaur Era

This is post 799 for me. And, I'm going to talk about dinosaurs for a couple of reasons. First, Buddy had a science project where he had to do a diorama-type visual aid on the dinosaurs of the Jurassic Period.

He had all the ideas, I merely helped him find some resources for information. I already knew that some dinosaurs were herbivores and others were carnivores, but I didn't have a distinct knowledge on specifically which ones ate leaves and shit and which ones ate littler dinosaurs. I'm now further educated on that topic.

It all made me think about my days as an herbivore (or vegetarian, to bring it up to date).

For nine years, I ate no meat, no meat by products. I did eat dairy - milk, cheese, eggs, that sort of thing. But, I did seriously scour labels. If the product had lard, beef broth, chicken stock or anything of that nature, it was not for me.

I practically lived off Campbell's Vegetarian Vegetable soup, hard boiled eggs, yogurt, Dr. Pepper, beer, potato chips and macaroni and cheese.

No wonder I only weighed 105 pounds in college (at 5 foot 9). I had a vegetarian and very controlling boyfriend at the time who monitored my food intake. I stayed at 105 for him. (and there's more, but that's a whole 'nother blog).

This was all back in the early 80s to the early 90s and being a vegetarian at that time was not only difficult, it was expensive.

Extra fun was had by trying to get food at any sort of restaurant - be it a nice sit down one or fast food.

One time, the ex BF and I went to Bennigan's. They had a black bean soup on the menu that sounded really good. So, I asked our server: "Is this soup made with any beef or chicken broth or stock?" Of course, in all her pimply teen server manner, she rolled her eyes and said she would check with the kitchen.

She returned and reported that the soup contained nothing I had asked about, so I ordered it. It arrived on my table and I sipped a spoonful. There was SAUSAGE in it! Um, hellooo? No meat means no meat, right? Dum dum took the soup away and didn't charge me for it.

Another time, I went to Burger King with some college friends. I ordered a whopper with cheese and everything, except NO patty. They looked at me as if I were growing a dick from my forehead, but charged me and delivered the product.

I never eat a fast food sandwich without first inspecting under the top bun. Most times (even today), I wipe off most of the half a jar of mayonnaise they like to slather on. I like mayo, but let's use some moderation here, mmmkay?

Okay, so I lifted the top bun and found teeny bits of meat flecks. What in the stir fried hell of patchouli was up?

I had to take the sandwich back to the counter, point out the offending meat flecks - and tell them that it was very obvious that an employee had just removed the patty from an already made whopper, re-wrapped it and acted like everything was just hunky-dory. I explained that I had been meat free for many years and if I ate that sandwich, I could possibly get very ill from it.

They fixed me a new sandwich, but I can't be sure there wasn't a booger on it or something. You know how vindictive food service employees can be.

After I met the Evil Twin, I knew keeping up with my meat free lifestyle would be difficult and I really missed tacos and bacon. Tofu tacos just don't cut it and fackon just isn't right, either.

So, I became an omnivore. Even though I still like ordering the vegetarian options at restaurants.

And there are some meals I fix (i.e. Thanksgiving dinner) where I won't eat anything except side dishes and the rolls. It's okay, I've been like this my whole life.

But, these days, I do truly love a single burger from Wendy's with cheese and everything - then I pick off the onions and wipe the bun down! ;-)