We had a load of friends over last night (hence, no Saturday update - I was far too plastered to attempt something that complicated). There were 10 adults, 6 children and more hootch than anyone has a right to.
The drinking got started around 5:30 pm and went downhill from there. But, oh!, we had such a wonderful time! The Evil Twin risked life and limb to trek to Kroger's and get chips and veggies and snacks.
Some of our guests had other people/parties to attend, so the crowd thinned out around 8:30. By 9:30, I was wrecked and ready for bed. I bid our other guests a good night and got in bed before I got naked or did anything else to embarass myself. I slept amazingly well and woke up at precisely 5 am.
I felt great, but I couldn't get to sleep again, so I decided to make myself useful. I got up and started the prep work for a beef stew in the crock pot. At one point, the Evil Twin, hearing noises in the kitchen, came in (naked!) to see what was going on. I assured him that I hadn't lost my mind and was just *awake* for the day. Before he went back down the hall, he said when I was finished in the kitchen, I could come back and finish the naughty business we had (apparently) been involved the evening prior.
I gave Mr. Twin an early Christmas present. We were talking and I was sitting up in bed about halfway. I reached over to grab my tube of Vaseline I keep on the nightstand (NOT intended for dirty use). It's what I use before bed to moisturize my lips and when I wake up and they feel dry ... I'll give 'em a swipe of Vaseline and they feel great.
So, I'm slathering it all over my mouth when I notice that it didn't smell like Vaseline. No, it wasn't. In the dark, I had picked up a similar sized tube of DIAPER RASH CREAM and was liberally coating my lips with it.
I asked the ET if he could hand me the jizz towel on his side of the bed. He said, "Well, it's covered in jizz." and I said, "It's also going to be covered in diaper rash cream because I'd rather have jizz on my face than diaper rash ointment."
After that bit of excitement, I was able to lay back down and snooze for another hour or so until Sissy woke up.
We still have loads of booze left, so I think it's going to be a very Merry Christmas, indeed at Casa Evil Twin.
Oh, my word, that's freaking hilarious. Merry Christmas to you both! O Come All Ye Faithful, or something!
ReplyDeleteI'm still dying at how that diaper rash cream must've looked on your lips, since the last time I used diaper rash cream it was kinda thick, white, and pasty.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry you had butt cream on your lips, but I'm glad you shared the laugh with us.
Uh...
ReplyDeleteMmm.
Merry Christmas to all at La Casa Del Mal Hermana!
You made me laugh and cry because I am laughing so hard....crap, I need a Depends.
ReplyDelete