I had to go to our family physician yesterday - a follow up visit, trying to manage my anxiety (bah!) and the nurse weighed me and asked me my age. I literally had to think about it! I'm 38. I don't feel 38 and I certainly don't act it. (Anyone who has heard me sing the Diarrhea Song knows this already - I was making up new lyrics just last night!) And, here's the thing - I don't think I look it, either. When I get out of the shower in the morning and I'm sitting at my make up mirror - I look at my un made up face and I like what I see.
Sure, there are a few lines here and there, but really, to be pushing 40, it's not that bad. I use moisturizer religiously and I think that's helping. Yes, I do have to color my hair these days, but I choose the dye that is closest to my natural color. I've had black hair all my life. That's not gonna change now.
Here's a dark confession: when I'm getting in the shower in the morning and catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror, I like that too. I've had 2 kids and things aren't exactly in the same place they used to be, but hey, that's alright. My hips are rounder than I'd like to see, but I've worked that off before and I can do it again. That's where my handy exercise ball comes in play.
I hope I always feel like a kid. At my age, raising two kids (one of whom is only 13 months old), I'm going to need my sense of humor to stick around for a while. Of course, when Buddy does or says something that is kind of off-color, I give him the stink eye as if I disapprove, but that's what my mom did and I feel I at least need to make the effort to have him grow up with some sense of decorum. You know, like it's okay to sing the diarrhea song at home, but not at school/work, etc. LOL.
I am actually attending Mass this evening at 5 pm. I hope the walls don't crumble as I enter...I didn't feel any trembling when I was there for Ash Wednesday! Time to go find a pair of jeans and a shirt that is at least not dirty. One reason I love being Catholic - casual wear at every service! :-)
Aw, c'mon! There's nothing wrong with singing the diarrhea song at work!
ReplyDeleteI love being silly with my kid. I am trying to find the delicate balance between instigator and parent...
ReplyDeleteI am finding, oddly, that the older I get...the happier I am with WHO I am.
Also - not Catholic, but wear jeans and work boots to church almost every Sunday. It's freeing to just show up as...YOURSELF, isn't it?
- Side note: My Nooze MAY have a little WV in her; I lived there for 6 years (college and after) - and I STILL MISS IT!
I don't think I look 46 when I look in the mirror. But when I see a photograph.....
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