Not Enough

This is today's topic for the Madhouse

I often say that there is not enough Ativan in the world to keep me even semi calm in large crowds or unfamiliar situations.

And, I often say there are not enough hours in the day. But, really? What would I do with more hours? Continue to stay anxious a few more hours? Let my children drive me to the loony bin for sure? (don't get me wrong - I love them to bits, but they like to ride my last nerve - with spurs on).

I have to say I do feel blessed to have just enough in life. Enough to pay the bills and keep food on the table. Enough love to go around to all my family and also to receive enough love in return.

I guess we have to get our "enough" from different areas of our lives.

I am not happy with this entry, but it's got to be enough for today. I have a busy day ahead and need to get started. I'll see you hooligans tomorrow.

Have a great Wednesday! :-)

Love,

The Source of Anxiety

I think I know why I've been feeling so anxious the last few days. Today is Kindergarten Round Up day for Sissy. She and I will get to meet the teachers and she will be put through a battery of tests: eye exam, hearing, can she count to 10? (she can count to 100 and also do basic math), etc.

Yes, I've done this before - with Buddy - and I was just as nervous even though I knew everyone at his school. Buddy went to a private Catholic school. To the tune of many thousands of dollars a year. Well, we can't exactly afford that these days and also while I think it was beneficial to him to have a small class size, I don't think his education was superior to any school I ever attended.

So, Sissy will be going to the public school in our district. It is touted as the best around and I'm sure we'll be happy there. Plus, we'll be able to take a vacation every year or three (as opposed to no vacations ever, because all the money was spent on tuition).

Anyhoo, even though I've been through this with Buddy, it was a different school and different circumstances. Today will be a new adventure. And, I really don't like "new" or going to places I've never gone before. It kind of makes me want to have diarrhea. Know what I mean?

I don't care what they think of me, personally, but I do care how I will react in a situation. I mean, I'm a nice person and I like to joke around, but some people don't "get" my sense of humor.

I never want to be "one of the crowd", but I also don't want to be a jackass:

Innit he cute? :-)

It's time for me to face the music and get ready for uncomfortable meeting of new people. Wish me luck! :-)

Love,

Hello, Monday

Say that in your head like Jerry Seinfeld when he would say "Hello, Newman". And by the tone of his voice, you know it wasn't a pleasant greeting.

I used to love Mondays. I knew that after a hectic weekend with the whole family, I could decompress on Mondays and have some quiet time to myself.

Now, Mondays just represent another day of running around, making lists for groceries and errands for the rest of the week and feeling blah. I'd like to have one day to just relax. I mean, I don't get many breaks on weekends and during the week, I try to tie up all the loose ends while everyone else is at work/school.

The good news is that I finally gave the Evil Twin a sample of the kind of tattoo I want. Now that he knows what direction to go in, I think he's actually going to do it! This will be my 5th and last tattoo (I promise!). I'll post a picture of the final design and then another pic of the finished product on my person! And, no, I am not getting a tramp stamp, thankyouverymuch. I'm thinking upper left arm. We'll see.

Well, I must hurry off here and get a few things done before picking up Sissy at preschool. She was so excited to go today because she got some Sketchers "Twinkle Toe" shoes over the weekend and she wants all her classmates to see them. LOL. It must be nice to be 5 and get so excited over a pair of bedazzled shoes!

I hope all my hooligans have a good Monday and I'll be back!

Love,

Sooooo

I had my hair cut yesterday and it feels great. It's not much different, just a tiny bit shorter. I decided on having the cut done before I bleach, dye and re-purple the front (the back needs some grey coverage). Less hair to have to deal with, ya know? I am not only a cheapskate, I'm also not very patient, so spending hours on my hair is not my idea of a good time. But, if I do it myself, it's super cheaper! YAY!

I did not receive any secrets this week, so we can cross our fingers for next Friday, right?

When I get the hair all "right", I'll post some new pics! :-)

Until then, enjoy your Friday and weekend, hooligans. I'll be back with more later!

Love,

Struggling

I've been struggling for a few weeks. I don't know if it's the time change - which has never bothered me before (not like the Fall time change) - or if it's mild depression, when I don't have anything to really be depressed about or what??

I'm tired all the time. I'm starting to feel those old anxiety feelings creep back in. The feeling that I couldn't leave the house, because then I'd have to interact with ACTUAL PEOPLE. ::::shiver:::: Let's just say I won't be leaving the house without my Ativan and a bottle of cold, cold water.

The weather has turned cold again. Just when I was reveling in wearing shorts and sandals, today I am freezing. I wasn't going to turn the heat on, just out of spite, but when I was still shivering after blow drying my hair, I caved.

After I drop Sissy off at preschool, I'm getting my hair cut (YAY! That always makes me feel better). And, since my hair dresser is in the same area as the Mart of Wal I like to shop at AND since gas prices are ridiculous high and probably going higher, I decided to roll them into just one trip. It's only about 10 miles one way, but doing 2 (two) 20 mile round trips in 2 days seemed like a waste of time - and gas! You know how cheap I am!

I forgot about the Wednesday Madhouse yesterday - I swear, this week has seemed like a month, with no breaks! Perhaps I will get to that topic tomorrow and not bore you to tears with my Debbie Downer feelings. What can I say? Sometimes I need to vent my spleen. Aren't you all SO lucky?

Have a good Thursday hooligans. Mine promises to be extra busy, but maybe that'll keep my brain preoccupied and I can't dwell on things that make me crazy. :-)

Love,

A Shout Out From the "Tech Wizard"

That's the nickname my 13 year old Buddy has bestowed upon me - seeing as how I'm very uncool and some technology confounds me. Not all of it, mind you - just certain things.

I do okay troubleshooting on the computer, but even I have moments of WTF? And, Blogger is giving me one of those moments.

I get comfortable with my routines and therefore, I'm less likely to change things. But, I need HALP! With Blogger, you can "follow" other blogs and then they magically appear in your "dashboard" reader thingie (and yes, that's the technical term). However, BLOGGER limits it to 300 blogs.

Most of the blogs I "follow" don't post every day or even very frequently. A big bunch of them have stopped blogging and just *POOF* disappeared all together. But, they're still on my "dashboard" list.

There are some newer blogs (or new to me) that I would like to add. I can't add them because of the maximum "300" rule. Here's the deal: I would like to delete several that have gone missing or gone under or just plain stopped blogging months ago, but the "dashboard" feature does not make that process easy or seemingly, even likely.

Is there anyone out there who can help me with this conundrum? Or even offer a number or email for Blogger, so I can question them myself? I promise that I am not deleting anyone who is a regular...I just want to add a few new regulars. :-)

And, that's it for Wednesday, hooligans! Hope y'all have a great one. I have to shop at the Mart and it's looking like rain soon. Should be fun!

Love,

One Step Closer

I can call today to set up an appointment for Kindergarten Round up for Sissy! She'll get to meet the teachers and I'll get the scoop on what to expect.

Buddy was sent to private Catholic school, but I was not very happy towards the end and I thought, "Self, you can get the same bullshit down the street for free." The Evil Twin and I both attended public schools and had adequate (or even beyond adequate) educations. Heck, I even went on to waste my dad's money on a Bachelor's Degree - which I did in fact graduate and now I use that education to schlep my kids around town and take care of them.

And to think: I wanted a Master's Degree at some point! My dad paid every shiny penny of my higher education, including rent, food, bills, etc. Before he passed away, he bought a pre-paid college plan for Buddy. We're hoping Buddy gets a scholarship and we can transfer that on to Sissy. Otherwise, she'll just have to be a stripper or something (not that there's anything wrong with that).

At any rate, with the crotch parasites being 8 years apart, we won't have 2 in college at the same time. Unless Buddy is like my brother who spent 8 years at the university and still flunked out. (dad paid his way, too).

Anyhoodle, I guess my point here is that next fall, both of my little charges will be in school full time.

I'll certainly be able to get more accomplished during the days. My mom was a stay at home mom all my life. It was nice to come home from school and have her there.

We'll see how it goes, I suppose. If it comes to keeping a roof over our heads or food on the table, I might consider something part time - like selling my already worn panties on the internet. That should be lucrative!

I'm excited to find out what's in store for my baby girl. The school she will attend is often touted as the best one in this area - thank goodness we're in that district! :-)

I'm off to get myself in check for the day and get Sissy ready for preschool. I have errands to run (stop the presses! No one would guess I have errands! LOL).

One thing I DO know: I will be glad to walk away from the shitty pre-school she has attended this year. The only reason I didn't move her is because she had already made friends and I know, first hand, how having to change schools mid-stream is stressful.

I may not be "Mother of the Year" material, but at least I keep their best interests at heart!

Happy Tuesday, hooligans!

Love,

Thoughts

It's been a helluva week around here. I've had some fun and some stress, so I guess it all evens out in the wash. (Damn! I forgot about all that laundry! Ugh!). It'll have to wait until my return from the Mart.

I received an email this week asking if I planned on bringing back the Friday Secrets. I would love to. Maybe not every single Friday, but what if I collected them until I had a handful or so, then posted? eviltwinswife@gmail.com if you're interested in sending in a secret. Or, hell, if you just want to chat. It can take me a day or two to reply to regular email (I never reply to secrets), so just know I'm the queen of procrastination.

I do have a funny story before I head out. On Tuesday, I had planned to run by the Kroger in St. Albans to pick up a few things and a prescription for the Evil Twin. Well, I had a stomach bug or food poisoning or something because I felt like crap. I asked the Evil Twin if he would mind going by and getting the few things after work.

I'm sure pharmacies everywhere are like ours. With all the medical privacy laws, there is a sign about 3 feet from the counter asking the next person in line to stand THERE for privacy of the person ahead of them. So, being a rule following sort of fellow, he stood THERE. The woman in front of him apparently had a blue million questions. He did overhear her asking about expiration dates on several of her truckload of pills.

The woman was wrapping up her business, making her purchase and some guy swooped in and practically hopped up on her shoulder. He even put his other items on the counter - before she was even finished! The clerk said nothing even though the Evil Twin (at over 6 feet and about 250lbs) had been CLEARLY standing there for about 20 minutes.

The Evil Twin just about had a stroke. He yelled, "Am I invisible? I'm standing right here!"

Doofus line cutter: "I didn't see you."

TET: "You didn't see me? I've been standing here for 20 minutes to give this lady her privacy while she dealt with the pharmacy. Did you not see this sign?" (he then proceeds to turn the sign around and read every word very slowly).

DLC: "Well, you can go ahead of me, if you want."

TET: "You're damn straight because I WAS HERE FIRST." At this point, he brushes his arm across the counter and sends most of the DLC's items flying. By this time, he had completly lost it and by all accounts, the air was turning blue.

Then, Lady he had shown courtesy for speaks up, "I think you should watch your language."

TET: "I don't think it's any of your business. Besides, I was standing back at the sign to be courteous to YOU."

The entire store had stopped shopping to gawk at the scene unfolding.

Um, yeah.....I don't think we'll be using that pharmacy any more.

Love,

Annoyances

Plenty of things get on my nerves. When I was younger, I would listen to AC/DC turned all the way up to 11. Now that I'm older and slightly hard of hearing, I don't enjoy noisy distractions of any kind.

Sure, I'll pop a CD in my laptop every so often, but I never turn on music in the car. There are a couple of CDs rolling around in there, but they're probably things the Evil Twin put in the little storage area, then forgot.

If I'm home alone, the TV is off. There isn't anything worth watching during the day anyway.

Both of the kids have a DSi and plenty of games to play on them. Buddy will generally turn the sound down or use earbuds to listen to his. Sissy has no such interest in being courteous.

Thanks to my early days of AC/DC at ear shattering levels, I sometimes can't tell where a sound is coming from. Everytime I hear those silly games going, I think it's my cell phone.

It's pretty sad when I can tell what game it is just by the corny music. I need a life!

Or maybe I should look into becoming a librarian...

Love,

Life or Something Like It

Having two children eight years apart can be exhausting. They have different schedules, they're in different schools, they don't always get along.

I've been having a tough time lately. Most likely due to the still cruddy weather. But, also feeling unappreciated and overwhelmed. This too shall pass. Right?

I just need to get in the shower, get Sissy to preschool and get back home so I can concentrate on some regular household things. I always feel better when I manage to accomplish some sort of organization. No one notices - I don't know why I bother, but I guess my OCD might derail. And, then I'd be stuck. Being crazier than everyone thinks I am.

I'll get back home and do all my jobs. Maybe I can sneak in a nap - I think I deserve it.

Enjoy your Monday, hooligans. Maybe I'll be in a better frame of mind tomorrow.

Love,

My Absence on Friday

I went to wake up Buddy at the usual time on Friday morning - around 6:30/6:40A - and noticed that he had dried blood on his face.

This is not unusual, since I had frequent nosebleeds as a child and he has inherited that lovely malady. It's also cold here and the dry air doesn't help much. I had them until I was about 18 or 19. He has become used to the ordeal and it doesn't freak him out - it always looks like a lot more blood than it really is.

So, I don't know - he had a nosebleed at some point during the night or early morning. I get him up and run a wash cloth under some warm water to clean off the dried stuff on his face. While touching his face, I notice his skin is very warm and he looks a little green around the gills. He put his head down on the towel bar in the bathroom, then took a few steps back into the hallway.

He started to fall, collapse. I tried to hold him up, but he's too heavy for me to lift anymore. His head hit the linen closet door and he was unresponsive and his forearms were all twitchy. I screamed for the Evil Twin who was downstairs in his office. I shook Buddy and called his name. No response.

I hopped over Buddy and ran downstairs as fast as I could. By the time the Evil Twin and I got back up the stairs, Buddy was on his feet - in the kitchen. He said he felt dizzy and nauseous, and just wanted to lay down.

I took his temperature (99.9 - nothing serious) and called his pediatrician. We spoke and she said because he had been sick, then the loss of blood and possible dehydration, those all added up to something that would trigger a fainting spell.

I gave him ice water, which he wanted and kept an eye on him. I woke him every half hour or so to make sure he didn't have a concussion. His doctor said she'd be glad to see him if he got worse or I was too worried, but it didn't seem like anything out of the ordinary. He had blood loss, a fever, (possibly a virus), but needed rest and fluids. So, that's what we did all day.

By about noon-ish, he was looking much perkier and was sitting up, drinking ice water and watching TV. It was scary for yours truly because while I personally have fainted (due to dehydration and being over heated), I have never witnessed another person fainting.

I have since ordered wireless intercoms for our house. It's only 2700 square feet, but it is laid out in an unusual manner and the insulation is serious biz. Not much can be heard from one end to the other or one floor to the other.

So, that's where I've been: Freaking out about my 13 year old all weekend, because Buddy will always cause me a heart attack when he is sick.

Happy Daylight Savings Time, my hooligans! Enjoy your Sunday, get a nap and come back to visit me soon! Rowwwrrr.

Love,

Fun at the Mart

Oh, joy, joy! I had to visit the Mart again today. I had forgotten to pick up a couple of things on Mr. D's list and our list was piling up again already. What can I say? I've got a 13 year old boy who enjoys eating and a 5 year old daughter who is a big fan of the snax.

Also, my glasses needed a new left lens. The first one was too strong. My lens was in, and while I was out and about, I hit the Mart. In the pouring rain. I hate driving and even less so when the weather is craptastic. I white knuckled it about town and now I have a massive headache.

If I had placed a piece of coal in my ass, it would be the Hope Diamond by now.

Good news: I made it home in one (wet) piece and my glasses are AWESOME at assisting my vision now. I don't even care that the Evil Twin now calls me "Mawmaw". He's been wearing progressive lenses for years now, so he became a crusty old "Pawpaw" waaaaay before I needed glasses to read. LOL! Stick that in your pipe and smoke it, bro!

Anyhoodle, I went by the Mart - as disgusted as I was with the weather and the fact that I read an article yesterday that most shopping cart handles have fecal matter on them...I'm already OCD about my hands. I did NOT need to read that. I better just buy stock in hand sanitizer now. Gag!

While tooling about the gross Mart (the one I hate shopping in, but it was closer to the eye docs place), I saw this little gem:

Hello? Are people so lazy/busy today they have to squirt applesauce down their gullets on the go? Seriously?

This is almost as ridiculous as the "crush cup" yogurts. I mean, my own husband had to use a plastic drinking straw that he pilfered from the kitchen at his office to spread chicken salad on his bread after I forgot to add a disposable plastic utensil for chicken salad spreading (I pack the chicken salad and bread separately, so the bread doesn't get all soggy). That's ingenuity for ya!

Afterwards, he sent me a kind text message to thank me for my oversight. I thank my lucky stars that he is smarter than the average bear. He didn't have to resort to dipping the bread into the container like he was having hummus and pitas. Although, I'm sure he would have resorted to that before just lapping up the chicken salad with his tongue and then taking a bite of bread.

Sorry this is a late update, but what can ya do when life gets in the way? You just have a happy Thursday, hooligans and I'll see ya tomorrow!

Love,

How Many Mondays in a Week?

Last week, every day was a Monday. This week hasn't fared any better so far.

Around here, we don't do much for birthdays or anniversaries. We generally let the birthday person choose a restaurant and then go have a nice lunch or dinner. Sissy chose Red Lobster (Why? I'm not sure...she doesn't even like seafood). Due to the weather and our schedules, we weren't able to coordinate her birthday dinner with her actual birthday (February 2nd), so we decided to go on an "off" night - thinking it would be less crowded.

Last night was the date chosen. A Monday.

After all, who would be eating themselves into a seafood coma on a Monday evening?? Ha! That place was packed! We had to wait to be seated, then wait on our appetizers, then more waiting because we had no silverware.

But, eventually, things turned around and we had a lovely dinner. The Evil Twin started with the stuffed mushrooms and Buddy got the calamari appetizer. I knew I'd be doing well to make it past the salad and cheese biscuits. We brought home 3 boxes of food that no one could finish!

We got home late and got Sissy in bed. Buddy had mentioned earlier that he had science homework, but by the time I was fully engaged in my food coma, I had forgotten that and asked him if he wanted to watch an episode or 2 of a show we're getting on the DVR.

This is the time he should have spoken up and said, "No, I have homework. Remember?" And, I would have said, "Oh, that's right. We'll save the shows for another time."

The way I see it: He's 13. His homework is his responsibility. I did not need his pity party or to hear him yelling at his sister for no reason, other than her she was in his line of sight.

So, this morning, there was much carrying on and gnashing of teeth. I was primarily blamed for being the distraction that will make our son get an F on a science project he KNEW needed to be completed. I was also vilified for not doing enough dark clothes in the laundry since the Evil Twin didn't have a pair of matching black socks (he did, just not a pair he liked).

I'm going to start making Monday my day "off" and not doing a damn thing. It doesn't really matter if I do anything or not.

Now, my head hurts - along with my heart. I think I'll go start a load of dark clothes, so everyone has black socks to wear.

Love,

My True Love

Well, besides the Evil Twin....it's make up.

I don't think all women should HAVE to wear or FEEL they need to wear make up, but I love it.

It's like my own personal art project every day. And, I do mean EVERY.DAY. Even on days I don't leave the house. I just feel better when I have it on. I also like for my hair to be clean, dried and styled.

One of my many quirks, but I love it all the same.

I often "multi-task", by blow drying my hair and doing my make up at the same time. I use the mineral powder make up, so it's easy to apply with just one hand (I use all brushes).

I've got a hellacious day planned, so I'm off to the races.

Hope y'all have a lovely Monday, hooligans!

Love,

It's True: I'm a Klutz

Growing up, my mom always said I was like a bull in a china shop. My parents sent me to many charm classes along the way. Charm classes are for Southern girls to learn to be genteel, walk with a book on our heads, and sit so we wouldn't develop spider veins on our legs.

Little did my parents know, I would grow up to be a punk rock chick with 12 earrings and (now) 4 tattoos and purple hair. But, I do have impeccable manners! I think that surprises people...how often I say "Excuse me" at the grocery or offer to help tiny older people reach that one can of beans on the top shelf.

So, I'm gracious, with good manners. But, that doesn't change the fact that I'm a klutz. As a teen, I took out both sides of my parents' garage trying to back a car out (their garage was oversized, too - how could I hit both sides??).

I routinely trip or fall or just spazz out at unknown times.

Last week, Buddy wanted some popcorn chicken. I threw them in the oven, on a sheet pan. When they were ready, I pulled them out, but knocked the corner of the pan on the edge of the stove above and 3 renegade nuggets went flying to the bottom of the oven.

Well, I couldn't have food bits on the bottom of my oven! (Southern, remember?)

I had to go after those 3 nuggets! I was wearing an oven mitt, but it wasn't very long. I had to reach UNDER the hot coils to retrieve the offenders. I ended up burning my right arm about halfway between my wrist and elbow. It's awesome. (NOT).

I keep putting oinkment on it and scar therapy cream, but it's very unsightly and it itches like a mofo.

If I was a model, this would be me:



I call this "The Baby Calf look". Totally me. And the reason I don't wear heels. I'm already tall enough.

I'll be sure to report on all the other ways I injure myself through my own stupidity in the future.

Have a happy Friday, hooligans!

Love,

A Little Time

I spend a large portion of my day taking care of my family - especially the children. Buddy is self sufficient, but Sissy needs help for *everything*, even though she wants to do it "all by myself".

I'm so scattered, I have a mile long list of things I need to do.

It's no wonder why I am tired and ready to unwind by 8:00P.

I love taking 20 or 30 minutes in the evening to sneak off to our bedroom and curl up in the cool covers. It's so quiet back there.

I almost never fall asleep. I just like to stretch and have a peaceful moment or so. It's not something I get a lot. Everyone thinks being a stay at home mom is a super cushy job, but it takes lots of patience and planning. Two things I don't particularly have in spades.

I just need a little time to myself every day. I don't think that's too much to ask. My heart has been shattered into a million tiny pieces, so I'll let this go for now... See ya soon, hooligans.

Love,

Fire

This week's Madhouse topic is Fire. That's a toughie. While I have never experienced the trauma of a house fire, a very close friend of mine did (it was before we met). She and her son lost everything, including a few beloved furry family members. I can't even imagine the pain.

To add insult to injury, her home insurance is astronomical now. She's a single mom, trying to do the best for her son and then the insurance company jacks up the rate because of a fire that was NOT THEIR FAULT? This is one reason I can't stand insurance companies. Sure, I know it's necessary, but it's also highway robbery in my book.

You can pay and pay and pay for YEARS, then the second something does happen and you need it, you get punished for needing it. It's not likely that your house is going to burst into flames every other year or anything like that. I don't think any sane human wants their house to catch on fire.

My friend doesn't like to talk about the fire. I can see the pain in her eyes. It's too bad the insurance companies only see the bottom line ($$$) and not what is in the best interest of their customers. There! That's my rant o' the day, hooligans!

Have a great Wednesday!

Love,



________________________________________________
This is only a partial list of Madhouse participants...I'm working on adding other links, so please bare with me! :-)


Sara – yoyu mama
JMLC – Daydreams and Ruminations
Batty – Batty’s Adventures in Spooky Knitting
Barb – Spencer Hill Spinning & Dyeing
G – Not-A-Box
Evil Twin’s Wife – The Glamorous Life of a Hausfrau
Louise – Child of Grace
Allison – Allimonster Speaks
Heather – She Flies With Her Own Wings
Melanie – usually, things happen
Jennifer – Ask Poops, Please

A White Hot Mess

That's me! My allergies are out of control, but if I take anything, it makes me so sleepy. I just need to get in the shower and let the steam clear up my head a bit.

Then, on Sunday morning, as I tried to step over Sissy (who was conveniently laying in the middle of the floor), so I could get some water, my left foot got tangled up in the raggedy bottom of the right side of my lounge pants and I fell. HARD. On porcelain tile. Thank goodness, I only spilled water and the cup is plastic. But, I landed hard on my right hand. It hurts like a mofo.

I don't think it's broken, because it's not swollen or bruised or anything. Just VEEERY tender. On top of that, I was taking popcorn chicken out of the oven and the top of my arm brushed the upper rack. Burn city.

Mom always said I was like a bull in a china shop.

And, NO, I am not going to the Doc in a Box for Xrays. I spent over an hour in the MRI tube on Saturday and I need to make an appointment with my new neurologist to read the films, Buddy and Sissy both need appointments for their well-child check-ups. I'm waiting on my new lens for my glasses to come in (the left was too strong). Then, I was emailed a "to do" list from the Evil Twin who doesn't feel my housekeeping skills are up to par. That's fine...I appreciate having someone prioritize for me. I tend to be scattered.

I'm just so sick of sitting in waiting rooms. If I had a J.O.B., I'd have been fired by now. That's how much time I spend juggling schedules.

I need to get motivated for the day. I think I can clear my "to do" list slate before I take Sissy to pre-school today.

Happy Tuesday, hooligans!

Love,